For the Long Distance Bees – Benefits of Being in an LDR

posted 3 years ago in Long Distance Relationships
Post # 2
Member
1627 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

We were LDR before we got married and a year and a half after. Haven’t clicked on the article yet. Thr benefits we noted was strong communication.  We had to talk things out. We couldn’t be upset and just sit on a couch and be mad at each other. We had to communicate because we weren’t in the other’s space. We also made our weekends together really fun. Tried new restsurants and had really fun dates. We even went to a Christmas tree lighting.  Lame, but sweet.

Post # 3
Member
8425 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

My husband and I were LDR briefly before we moved in together.  I feel that LDRs aren’t necessarily “good” or “bad” for a relationship, but rather a catalyst.  If the foundation of the relationship is good, it makes the couple appreciate each other, listen, etc.  If the relationship was rocky to begin with, an LDR can make things even more difficult.

Post # 4
Member
4072 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I definitely agree with some of the points the aritcle made. LDR isn’t all bad. It has its ups!

I know for us, we became excellent communicators. It was actually probably something I really needed. I have a tendency to keep things to myself until it builds up and I blow. I couldn’t do that when we were LDR. I couldn’t give a cold shoulder or sigh or act fussy because the man wasn’t there to see it! I had to write things out and tell him if I was upset about something, and that skill has already benefitted our marriage. It was a good way to kick that habit mine.

That said, living together is 100x better. Hah. But I’m actually thankful for our time apart, as I can see the benefits it’s given us.

Post # 5
Member
103 posts
Blushing bee

I am currently in a LDR with my FI.  Have been for over a year now.  It’s definitely not easy and I don’t know if a lot of people would want to do a LDR for a very long period of time but I do feel like it forces you to have better communication with the other person and I feel like my LDR forced me and FI to actually look at the relationship seriously and decide whether it was something we wanted to take further or not.  Having the limited ability to see the other person does make you appreciate them a lot more because the time you do get to spend with each other is seen as precious.  I recall many visits with my FI that I would force myself to stay up late to try to get in as much time with him because I though that sleeping during our visits was wasting our time lol.

Post # 6
Member
2713 posts
Sugar bee

I would actually PREFER being in a LDR relationship.

Post # 7
Member
610 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I think being long distance was incredible for our relationship and for ourselves as individuals. We were one of the many high school couples that went to different universities and were told we wouldn’t make it. Out of, I believe, 8 couples from our high school that tried LDR, we are the only ones who made it. We absolutely became better at communication, and the time we had together was made so much better after spending weeks to months apart. We also had the opportunity to grow as individuals the way that college kids should. We both have our separate and strong groups of friends, something we probably wouldn’t have if we had gone to the same school. Having been in a long distance relationship for 4 years and all that doing so had taught us about ourselves as individuals and as a couple is the reason we feel fully confident marrying at 23 years old. We will actually be long distance again for 3 months this summer as he is away for work and it would be too much to move our entire lives (two furbabies included) for that short of amount of time. I’m actually looking forward to it because I know that when we come back together in August and spend that hectic month and a half before the wedding together it will be that much sweeter. I think all couples should do long distance at some point!

Post # 8
Member
1178 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

We did long distance for three years a while back (been together seven years total). And we’re now looking at another few months of long distance thanks to some goofy relocation timing.

It is no fun at all, but it did make us all-star communicators, lol. We came out of our LDR experience a much stronger and more committed couple.

Post # 9
Member
556 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

We were long distance for about a year and a half. It definitely strengthened our relationship. We got to know each other so well because we talked all time time, about everything. When we did get get married and move in together there was no difficult transition period that some couples can experience. We were just so happy to finally be together all the time. Plus, we had talked so in depth about everything, we knew each other and knew what to expect. As difficult as it was, I think being forced to be long distance for awhile has really benefited us.

Post # 10
Member
2455 posts
Buzzing bee

LadyBear:  Those all seem pretty true in my experience! FI is ex-military so when he was deployed we were LD (obviously). And then while in college he had an internship over 3 hours away and rented out there. Then I finished college first (due to him being military before college) and relocated for a job 2 hrs away.

Now we’ll be moving in together FINALLY!

Post # 11
Member
2150 posts
Buzzing bee

LadyBear:  FI and I were LDR for about 6 months before he moved in with me. One benefit I loved was time to myself, or #8 in the article. 

I love spending time with FI, so when he’s around (which is a lot since we live together), I want to spend my time with him. I often forget to make time for myself now.

We’re getting married over the summer, and depending where I get a job in August, we may be LDR again for a year :/

Post # 12
Member
3280 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

We’ve been long distance most of the past 3 years. I think the only benefit for us is productivity! I’m a full time student and worker and he works 14 hour days 5-7 days a week so we get a lot done when were not together. But it’s also hard because when we are together we want to drop everything and spend time together but it’s just not possible. It’s not like it’s ever even been remotely hard to stay faithful or busy, it just sucks not seeing my best friend every day! I could seriously not be any happier that we will be done with long distance in 6 weeks!! Ah, I pray we never have to do this again. 

Post # 14
Hostess
24457 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I agree with that so much!  We were LDR at the beginning and I still crave me time often!

Post # 15
Member
109 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

We were long distance for 2 years while dating/engaged/waiting for k-1 visa before we got married (he is from Germany). I think it helps tremendously with communication, because that’s all you really have. 

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