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For the marrieds: wedding dos and don'ts?

posted 1 year ago in Beehive
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    1.
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    Bumble bee
    Selene221    October 31, 2012  

    What were you glad you did? What would you do over if you could?

     
    2.
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    Helper bee
    gurlwithapen    October 2, 2010   Allen, Tx - wedding in Athens, TX

    bump

     
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    Worker bee
    sheisaeval    August 8, 2010   DW at estes park, co

    I'm glad I had a small destination wedding. We could spend more time with each person and only people who cared enough to come came to the wedding. I'm glad I chose the location - it's beautiful. I'm also glad that we didn't have to spend a ton to have a nice wedding.

     

    I regret not hiring a less traditional, younger, more experimental photogrpaher - ours was older and traditional, and we didn't get any fun, relaxed, casual, silly shots that we wanted, just posed and traditional shots, wihch is not us

     
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    Buzzing bee
    EvaBostonTerrier    July 3, 2010  

    Glad I did: hand made my veil and headband, handstamped the napkins with cute marriage sayings, helped write the ceremony to make it us, hired a violin duet for the ceremony, paid a lot (for our budget) for photography, and small wedding size (only 90 guests total)

    Do over: not agree to remake my seating chart (for the 3rd time) the day before the wedding, stress out so much about the details!

     
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    Bumble bee
    Dragonsus    December 19, 2009   Lexington KY

    1 - I would have had a bustle for my dress

    2 - I would have not splurged on special paper for the ceremony programs (or would have made them myself on the paper)

    3 - I would have told my mother in law that we could make our own albums and used the extra part of the photography budget to do an aniversary or TTD shoot.

    That's about it - otherwise it was a wonderful day!

     
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    Honey bee
    yrret107    November 28, 2009   Seattle, WA; Married in West Chester, PA

    I think most of the smaller details and larger ones are up to the bride and groom. Everyone's different.

    Like some brides really want a video of their wedding.  I didn't.

    But the one advice that a friend of mine told me and I would pass on to other brides and groom would to remember to eat.  Either tell your bridesmaids to give you something to eat while you are getting dressed.  Of course, I was too nervous to eat while I was getting ready.  My sister did have grapes for me to nibble on.  It didn't fill me but at least my stomach wasn't empty.

    And the day will go by fast! One minute you are at the church and next minute it's the end of the reception.

    I didn't have the chance to say hello to everyone which I'm sad about.  But then again, if I did, I maynot have been on the dance floor as much as I was and that was something I didn't want to give up.  I had 130 guests come and I wish the guests that I didn't get a chance to talk to would have come up to me to say goodbye.

     
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    Bumble bee
    rachelss    August 22, 2010   Fort Collins, CO

    I'm very glad we'll have video. I'm glad I had a long discussion with my photographer before the wedding about exactly what I wanted. I'm glad I ate lunch. I'm glad we had several get togethers for out of town guests in addition to the wedding.

    I wish I'd planned the packing up better. I wish I had eaten more food and some cake.

     
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    Helper bee
    absolutbettie    May 2, 2009   New York, NY

    Glad we did:  One random decor detail I am so glad we included was to have our cocktail bar placed along one side of the dance floor.  This helped make the reception so much more social and fun, like we were all at a bar or lounge.  This was at the suggestion of our super awesome and experienced wedding coordinator, which was overall the best wedding decision we made, hands down!!!  

    Do over:  stressed over the seating chart; overpaid for ceremony music; lost my original STD mailing list and accidentally forgot to send invites to 2 guests (I'm still sooo embarrassed about that last one)

     
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    Sugar bee
    ddubzz    June 5, 2010   Los Angeles, CA

    Glad:

    • for the photobooth-- it was a great success! 
    • that I didn't spend a small fortune on my dress... I had my moments of dress regret, but I'm glad I stuck to my guns and did not buy more than one dress
    • I didn't sweat the little details... no one will care if your linens don't match the dress that don't match the men's shirts.
    • I ate my meal-- it was so yummy!
    • we did table toasts... we were able to at least say hello and thank each table for attending
    • we paid a little more than we had originally budgeted for our photographer... she was worth every penny!
    • I wore 2.5" heels... I was able to dance the night away and still be comfortable

    Regret:

    • sending STDs... they were really cute, but not worth the extra time and money
    • not remembering my hair flower accessory!  I left it at our hotel!  :(

    I don't have too many regrets... I really really loved and enjoyed my wedding day!  I wish I could re-live it!  :)

     
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    Bee Keeper
    His Barista    September 4, 2010   Spokane, WA

    I'm glad we had a BM stay behind the morning of to help set things up. It was nice to relax knowing she had it covered.

    I'd re-do the rehearsal. We were supposed to start at 6:30. But we were 30 min late because I was downstairs stressing over flowers. Get some help, and don't worry about it! = )

     
    11.
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    Busy bee
    Lindsay05    August 21, 2010   Canada

    I am so happy I did about 95% of the work planning. It's great because then you don't have a million people putting in their input. In addition to that, we paid for it all ourselves which also deterred people from trying to plan our day. We splurged on the photographer but it's so worth it. Took a week off before the wedding to do last minute stuff (which there is way more than you might expect!). Didn't go around visiting people all day, made people come to me. Instead I hung out with my bridesmaids and had SO much fun. Sat back and let everyone else take care of all the little things.

    I regret not paying for everything way beforehand. Fully pay for things as you book them or at least pay a huge chunk. Makes the money issue way less stressful. Also we didn't have everything completely organized down to a timeline. But it all worked out in the end!

     
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    Worker bee
    bissell    July 23, 2010  

    Super glad we did: -first look

                                -sweetheart table

                                -Friday night wedding

                                -Candy buffet

    We didn't (or at least tried not to) sweat the small stuff.  Realizing that all of the little details that brides usually get so worked up over are the things that guests really don't notice. Ex. We didn't have ceremony programs; nobody cared, we didn't have a wedding party; nobody cared, we didn't do a champagne toast; nobody noticed, we didn't have elaborate centerpieces; nobody noticed. 

    ADVICE: Do what YOU want, don't worry about what others are going to think...afterall, you are the one who is going to remember it forever, your guests, however grateful they are, will enjoy themselves and move on. 

     
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    Helper bee
    PumpkinSpiceChai    September 2009  

    Our wedding was at one p.m.   Bridal party members as well as several family members were there from 11 a.m. on.  I'm so glad I ordered food for everyone (two sub trays, one veggie tray, chips, soda, water - all from wegmans) and put it in the kitchen at the church.  My mom said I didn't  need to and everyone could run out to get food as necessary.  But we had lots of OOT family who didn't know the area.  Plus, I didn't want people leaving and not returning when necessary.  It was nice to have plenty of food available for whoever needed some food before the ceremony.  It was awesome!  My mom spotted two guests who had driven 5+ hoiurs and come straight to the church.  She offered them a sandwhich for which they were grateful.  It was a little detail but many family members/ bridal party members expressed appreciation.

    Also super glad that I had a friend fully take on the role of DOC.  It was so nice to not have to worry about details the day of.  I knew everything was in capable hands and if any issues arose they would be handled - but not by me! :)

     
    14.
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    Bumble bee
    rabbit    September 3, 2010   Milwaukee, WI

    Glad for: our DOC- she was seriously a life saver! Without her I don't think we could ahve pulled everything off so smoothly! My husband wants me to add,"She was a Godsend. It couldn't have happened without her!" We're both glad we had our friend, Brother Michael, as our priest to marry us. I'm glad I opted for a veil with a blusher which covered my whole face- standing in the room getting ready to walk up the aisle and catching a look at myself in the mirror with it on is when the "OMG! I'm getting married!" moment hit me. It was the spark which lit me all day. The open bar- it was a huge hit with guests, it helped fuel much of the dance-floor fun, and it allowed me to over induldge in mimosas. Mmmmm...

     

    Regret: Not inviting more people. Out of 185 guests invited, only 80 were able to make it. I wish we'd gone ahead and invited a few more people whom we wanted to be there, but didn't invited thinking we'd have too many guests. I would have enjoyed having the company of more of our friends and family members around us! I also wish we'd had the foresight to designate someone(s) else as the sober drivers at the end of the night. I ended up in a stressfest after everything was all over because Out of the 15 or so people left after cleaning up, only 3 of us were sober and there were 4 or 5 vehicles which needed driving. Not getting more pictures of the double rainbow which arched over the reception hall!

     
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    Honey bee
    amariem25    October 2009  

    Glad I did - made a special guest book where each guest had a loose page of paper that they answered questions on - like how do you know the bride/groom, what do you want them to remember about this day, what's your favorite memory of the bride or groom, draw a picture of yourself, draw a picture of the married couple, etc...

    Do Over - I would have brought safety pins - my bustle broke and no one had anything on them to fix it!  it was freaking annoying and my grandma kept yelling at me to fix it and asking me "why don't your bridesmaids have anything on them to fix it for you?"

     
    16.
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    Blushing bee
    chocolatemalt    July 25, 2010   Austin, TX

    Glad we did:

    The photobooth

    Rehearsal BBQ the day before where we got to see everyone, because on the day of the wedding we were too busy to talk for long!

    Wrote our own vows

    Had a family member perform the ceremony

    Danced with my dad

    Didn't stress about programs, save the dates, or any other (to me) extraneous items

    Would do over:

    I would have taken more photobooth pictures with my sisters and niece

    I would have eaten more of the delicious wedding cake and maybe even finished one drink! But I'm glad I ate the dinner, it was delicious and my first meal of the day. I honestly can't think of anything else I would have done differently.

     
    17.
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    Helper bee
    Merry02    June 2010  

    Glad:

    -I did not allow myself to get worked up on my wedding day. I went in with realistic expectations, thinking something would probably go wrong, but knowing that no matter what happened, I was lucky enough to my best friend. Minor things did go wrong, but having that attitude really helped, and I have such overwhelmingly positive memories of that day.

    -We worked hard to make the wedding representative of us as a couple. No church wedding, funky, creative invitations, etc.

    -I didn't spend much money on my dress.

    Wish I had:

    -Enjoyed the ride more, and stressed less about all the planning.

    -Not worried so much at the beginning about what other people would think about the choices we made.

     

     
    18.
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    Busy bee
    MzMarzipan    July 24, 2010   Califonia

    Glad I:

    • had a beautiful wedding that I will remember for a life time!
    • spent the weekend at the venue.
    • got all the little things I wanted like cotton candy, photo booth, and cupcakes!
    • had videography (even though I haven't seen the finished product yet).  We didn't think we wanted it at first, but I think it will be nice to be able to relive the night and see all the things we missed.
    • had more fun at our wedding than any other wedding I have been to!

    Wish I had:

    • Taken a Xanax (my cousin/MOH suggested I do this months before the wedding...wish I had listened!).  I think I would have been able to eat more that day, and sleep more the night of the wedding, if I had done this.
    • not stressed over the programs OR wish they had been placed in a better location.  After stressing A LOT over these the day before the wedding I ended up with almost ALL of them when it was all over (they weren't all that cheap either!
    • was able to spend more time with guest that came from out of town.  We had oot family members and bridal party at rehearsal and brunch the next day...but for some reason didn't think of the friends that were making the treck across the country to be there for us special day..duh!
     
    19.
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    Sugar bee
    clarebee    August 21, 2010   Vienna, VA (wedding in Greensboro, GA)

    Glad that:

    • I was snacking all throughout the day AND ate my entire plate of food at dinner --> we actually asked our waitress to serve us our food first so we could eat quickly and then start going to tables
    • We had our friend marry us and wrote our own ceremony - it felt really personal and meaningful and a lot of our guests commented on this
    • I had a laid back attitude the day of and just said "whatever happens, happens" - it helped me SO much
    • had a massage the morning of my wedding - it helped to relax
    • we had all our guests at our rehearsal BBQ the night before AND about 75 guests at our day after brunch - it allowed us to spend more time with people outside of the wedding day
    • we took a boat from our reception to our hotel - one of my favorite memories from the night

    Wish that:

    • I had taken more pictures with friends and family at the reception
    • I had spent more time at the bar and/or outside on the beautiful balcony
    • We had taken some pictures at sunset
    • I had put my foot down even harder about how much I HATE tulle!
    • We had hired a different DJ because ours was NOT what we paid for!

    Overall I loved my wedding and it was the best night of my life (so far)!!

     
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    Blushing bee
    michigosling    June 26, 2010   married in Michigan, live in South Carolina

    Glad:

    • wedding coordinator-- not having to figure out where everyone was, or how the boutonnierres were getting to the dad, or if the decorations would be set up correctly let me enjoy the day
    • DIY centerpieces and guest book-- having small details that represented "us" was something that made our wedding special for me, even if many guests didn't understand why there were little paper airplanes all over
    • We went around to tables before the food was served
    • We did a destination wedding at the island I've wanted to get married at since I was little
    • We cut corners on things that didn't matter so much (I bought my veil at Michael's for $15, my shoes on the clearance rack at DSW, we opted for cupcakes instead of a tiered cake and saved $500...)

    Regret:

    • not looking at myself in the mirror after we got ready
    • spending so much time trying to find the "perfect" bridesmaids dress-- I wish I would have found something I liked the look of, had my MOH try it on, and then asked the girls to order it
    • getting worked up over people not coming to the wedding-- I didn't miss a single person on the day of the wedding
    • not having the photographer take pics of just the bridesmaids and just the groomsmen without the bride and groom
    • not calling the DJ out when he had only played 1 of our 12 "must play" songs with half an hour left in the reception
    • not talking with our photographer before we signed the contract to make sure we'd have our wedding pictures in time for our hometown reception
     

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