(Closed) For the non-religious bride…

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Does it bug you when a vendor you're interested in is OBVIOUSLY religious?
    Yes... : (30 votes)
    45 %
    No... : (13 votes)
    19 %
    Haven't run into that... : (23 votes)
    34 %
    Other {please explain} : (1 votes)
    1 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    14186 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    Interesting but I feel the exact same way! i actually shy away from people who blazen “i’m a Christian!” all over their product, business cards, etc etc. It’s a little too in your face and I’ve always felt that religion was private and should never be like “heres my business card, see my Jesus fish in the corner?”

    I read an interesting book called “I’m fine with God, it’s Christians I can’t stand” that discusses a lot of the “turn offs” that people run into with some Christians and this was actually one of the points, about how people use God as a marketing tool for their own benefit.

    Just an interesting book with lots of excellent points. my very strict Christian friend took great offense to it. Ironically the book mentioned a lot of her habits and interestingly enough, are most of the reasons I have trouble being friends with her and others who are very forceful about it, particularly when they are completely unprovoked. Something about believing they are doing God’s work by shoving it down your throat and telling you you are a bad person and going to Hell, in a nutshell

    Then again, I write off most people who are really extreme about anything in my face, not just religion. I’m equally discriminatory =]

     

    Post # 4
    Member
    2144 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I never ran into it. I don’t know if I would have a problem with it though. It would just depend on if they were rubbing it in my face or not and how much I liked the service they were offering.

     

    Hubby and I aren’t religious either, btw. The officiant did say God a couple of times, but I didn’t mind since my family is on the more religious side. I already erred in having a wedding outside of a Church (I think I’m the first lol not that they said anything to me about it).

    Post # 5
    Member
    69 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I wrote off a couple of vendors b/c of their lack of timeliness on responding to me in emails. (not a short amount of time, it was like 2 weeks before they got back to me!) But I haven’t run into any super religious folks to turn me off. I usually feel the same as you on people pushing their religion onto you, and the only thing I can think of that would pos that issue would be the officiant. But, my FI and I are going to be able to write our ceremony, so we’re planning on writing out all the God talk. 🙂

    Post # 7
    Member
    685 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    Although FI and I are more religious than others around us, he does find it odd when people use Bible verses as signatures.  As FI said, it’s fantastic they love their faith and all but does that have to do with our photos?

    Post # 8
    Member
    60 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I answered that I haven’t run into it, which is true for the wedding so far, but it does put me off a business of any sort when they have something religious incorporated into their business related materials.  It’s just so irrelevant–it seems like to only reason to do it is to attract customers of the same faith, and I’d be kind of bothered by someone for whom religion was a factor in choosing a plumber or something.  The whole thing just strikes me as odd.

    Post # 9
    Member
    253 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    I didn’t contact one cake baker that was recommended to me because of her website…the name of her business didn’t register with me as being religious until I saw the website and then it was SO obvious.  I was a little uncomfortable with the overtly religious material on the website and I knew that FI would say absolutely not, so I didn’t even bother looking into it further, especially since there are a million other places around.

    Post # 10
    Member
    15 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    I ran into this when I was looking for someone to do my alterations. I found one highly reviewed vendor, but her website was overrun with religious quotes and practices. I was turned off and found another vendor (who is wonderful). I guess I was worried that if it ever came up if I was religious, that I would not be welcomed. It’s a big assumption, but I just didn’t feel comfortable.

    Post # 11
    Member
    3316 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    I’m Jewish, and my FI is an atheist.  I have ordered products from vendors who advertised their Christianity, but it always creeps me out a bit.  I can’t imagine using one for a service that required more personal contact.  Then again, since we are a same-sex couple, I suspect those people wouldn’t want to work for us, either.

    This is not to say that I would avoid a Christian vendor generally.  People have a right to their private religious convictions.  However, if it is something that is advertised all over their professional site, then it would be likely to be too “in your face” for me.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1205 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2009

    I haven’t run into that with wedding vendors. Before I moved I did use a garage for car repairs that had a tinge of that, but it never bothered me. I’m not religious at all and I can’t pinpoint why it doesn’t bother me.

    I think that a verbal remark or something brought up for discussion would bother me more than a bible verse in an email (or in the case of the garage, on the receipt).

    Post # 13
    Member
    258 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I haven’t run into this issue with vendors but maybe it’s because of where I live. In this part of the East Coast, it’s really not big on pushing religion which is great. I know that if I did run into a vendor that ended every message, business card or email with some sort of God message, I wouldn’t use that vendor, it’s just not my thing.

    I have stayed away from vendors that are not quick in returning phone calls, make spelling mistakes in their emails or are late to appointments.

    Post # 14
    Member
    406 posts
    Helper bee

    I haven’t had any experiance with this with our vendors but with family and even our old newspaper delivery person’s voicemail. I’m agnostic and FI is athiest and we still get mail from the church he went to as a child that NOBODY in his family goes to.
    It does bother me to hear “God Bless” in a professional sense (unless it’s from someone in the church or religion “industry” [my brain is fried so I can’t think of the correct word to use]). I feel like it’s being pushy and inconsiderate of others. I NEVER say anything and NEVER would but I hate that they assume it’s not offensive to someone.
    Our ceremony doesn’t mention God at all, but is more nature based. We chose our Celebrant because of that. It might upset a few members of FI’s family but honestly we don’t care… everyone had to stand up at that Aunt’s daughters wedding and say that we’d help their marriage be God based and I was offended but did it anyway.
    Just my two cents…

    Post # 15
    Member
    14186 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    I live in the Bible Belt, too, and it’s fairly common practice to have religious paraphenilia on your business websites, etc. It’s one thing to say “my skills come from the Man above” or something, but then to list a bunch of quotes, verses, etc. You can be subtly thankful without being all intense. Unless of course, you are catering to that particular population. I’ve noticed a few vendors who use religion a LOT in their blog posts, and a PP is right, if you don’t share the exact same viewpoint as them, it would make me feel unwelcome or like I wasn’t going to receive as quality of a product because they look down on me. I do have a friend who prefers to use businesses who market their religion because she says she likes to support people who are open believers like her. Hm. Okay. I want good business practice, period.  

    I didn’t notice this when I lived in California, or even here in Georgia or when I was in Seattle. But I notice it EVERYWHERE in St. Louis, and down in SW Missouri where my parents live. Everything is huuuuge on religion and Christmas is insane. I was shocked to see Christmas trees in public schools when I transferred. It wasn’t allowed in California because we had lots of atheist, buddhist, jewish, hindu, etc, students and the school system respected their beliefs. Even as a Christian, I wasn’t too pleased with all the christmas stuff around for holidays. I knew we had some ohter-believing students, and I’m sure they felt uncomfortable, but simply didn’t want to speak up against the overwhelming majority. Ok i’m getting off topic.

    I really hate when people try to give me pamphlets then stare at me like I’m some horrible person because I don’t want to read what they handed me about saving my soul.

    Post # 16
    Member
    1896 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2009 - St. Thomas of Villanova Church & the F.U.E.L. House

    Wow, I guess it’s because we’re having a Catholic wedding, but I never really thought about this perspective!  Another awkward/uncomfortable/annoying aspect of wedding planning, I guess.  🙁

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