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What would you do if you got pregnant? i am putting up a poll for the people who don't want to respond, but I willingly admit that I wouldn't be up for adoption, so it would either be keep it (5% chance) or abort (95% chance).
PLEASE - I do not want people coming in bashing those of us who are not pro life. I am pro what is best for me and my family, regardless of what anyone else thinks
This is exactly why DH got clipped, then there is no "what if's". Best $72 I EVER spent, thank goodness for insurance.
We had this conversation, and I informed Mr. Lk that if it were to happen despite our diligent prevention efforts, we'd be having a baby, and he'd better be prepared to rub my back and feet for 9 months or so. At this point in the conversation I do believe that a vasectomy started looking more and more appealing. LOL
I am pro-choice all the way, and would gladly go back to the front lines to protect that choice for all women. I just already know what my choice would be. I couldn't terminate. It's just not right for me.
@MrsSl82be: I'm exactly with you. I feel like it isn't right to give a kid the life I would provide for them. I'm gonna be honest - I love spending money on traveling around the world and doing things for myself. I would end up being super resentful toward the kid, and they don't deserve it, so it's best for all parties involved if I just didn't go there.
@MadameTussaud: Couldn't have put it better myself and I think it's so awful we're made to feel sub-human and guilty for this choice.
@MadameTussaud: yup, we think exactly alike. I know some people look at me like a horrid beast when I say I would probably abort, but they can suck it, cuz its not their life that would be ruined if I had a kid. Plus, every med I am currently on have warning labels that say you are not allowed to take if pregnant, suspect you are pregnant, or breastfeeding
@lovekiss: and I totally get that choice as well. Glad to know that you still support either way :)
We've talked about it (and I'm trying to get him snipped too!) but we'd keep it.
I couldn't live with the thought that closed adoption or no that someone would be out there able to find out their parents were married and could have had a family, not some 14 year old girl that didn't know who fathered her baby and her parents just wanted to make it go away, because those kids normally go looking for their parents
I'm all for everyone's right to choose, who am I to force you to go through labor. It just isn't for me.
Abortion. No doubt in my mind, no hesitation. FI is on board with this 100% as well.
@skyeatnight: yeah, why is it so wrong to want to live our lives for ourselves?? I'm so tired of being made to feel guilty or terrible. I see how much people sacrifice their own lives for the sake of their kids... good for them, but I would much rather spend quality time with my FH doing things we love instead of obligations like sesame street, disneyland, and soccer practice.
I voted not sure. FI and I are in the works of getting the snip, snip but the main problem is we face discrimation because of his age (24) so it has been an uphill battle of doctors trying to convince me I'll be changing my mine (I have not ever wanted children, I think my first sentence ever was "I hate kids" *age 3). If I were to get pregnant however I am not sure what I would do. I am pro-choice but I would have to weigh the pros and cons of situation at that time.
@lovekiss: I feel exactly the same way. I'm fully pro-choice as well but yeah, I couldn't terminate.
@expecting rain: we are (almost) 28 and 30, and we are still getting flack from docs that we are too young!! It seriously pisses me off. But, I am not willing to let hubs get a snip yet...I worry to much that something would go wrong...I can't live my life without sex
@expecting rain: will they do a vasectomy on a guy who hasn't had kids? My FI wants to look into that, but I figured we'd get "no" from every doc because we haven't had kids already. I've already been told lots of no's for me to have any procedures done to myself, and I get super bad migraines from birth control, so it's been pretty frustrating.
@MrsSl82be: It really pisses me off. It is our relationship, our bodies, our choice. I have even had a shrink give his a-ok on it. It would be foolish of us to have children with FI having genetic defects that WILL be passed on to our offspring. It just doesn't make any sense. I wish doctors sometimes would stop playing God and do their jobs.
@MadameTussaud: I live in Canada so my situation may be different. They really don't want to do it if you haven't had children but if you find the right doctor apparently they will with sound reason. Here it depends on the doctor's personal feelings towards the situation, which is kind of stupid in my opinion.
@expecting rain: if you find one, pass his name onto me!! I'd be willing to drive up there and pay whatever it costs, lol
@MadameTussaud: Sure, I have plenty of young single childless guy friends who have had them. It is a simple procedure, fast, and an easy recovery. I watched DHs, it was facinating. The doc even had to tell me I was in his light. Our doc did the triple threat: cut, clip, and burn.
@MrsSl82be: Those complications are so so so rare. We did a ton of research about it before making the decision. DH was in bed for the weekend with bags of peas on the boys and back to construction work on Monday.
I didn't even think about docs saying no!
I asked for a hysterectomy for my 12th birthday...this isn't a phase!
@expecting rain: We are wondering if we will encounter the same sort of issue, since Mr. LK is only 32 and does not have any biological kids. Fortunately, since I got knocked up young and we're almost done raising DS, they won't give me a problem. If it needs to be me, I am thinking a lot about Essure. have you explored that option?
@WILLIAKELLLB: LOL, you sound like me!!
@tksjewelry: that is super awesome to hear! We'll start asking around, then. 
@lovekiss: No I haven't. But again, I have ran into problems too. Like doctors not wanting to give me an IUD, or giving me the shot. Maybe it is because I live in Canada's "bible belt" (really not that bad, but sometimes it feels that way) I am having these problems. But I will look into it.
@skyeatnight: woo-hoo!!! My FI has never been to the UK and I've been wanting to go back, so it's the perfect reason!! 
@tksjewelry: you got to watch? that's so cool!! Maybe we will give more thought to a vasectomy. Seems like it would be easier to get than permanent bc for me.
Do they do a test afterwards to make sure it was a success?
@expecting rain: now see, my doc is totally willing to give me an IUD, but I don't want to deal with hormones anymore. I want to get the Essure, but he doesn't do it, so I'd have to find someone who would. I have a friend in my area who has kids and is looking into it, and if I still want to go that route, then I might go to her doc.
Also have to think about if insurance will cover it or not too...
Ladies... I just want to remind everyone that this is a controversial topic and this thread may get heated. You are free to express your feelings on this topic but please keep this in mind from our commenting policy.
"Weddingbee is a diverse community with members across the globe. No single culture is better than any other, and we value every member’s perspective. "
Also, please refrain from personal attacks. Comments may be removed if personal attacks are found.
If you feel that you can't comment without using personal attacks then I think you need to step away from the computer. Or maybe you should agree to disagree.
Thanks for understanding.
ETA: This thread is not heated yet but I wanted to remind any newbees of our policy.
@MrsSl82be: They test, I think it was, 4 or 6 weeks later and a follow up a year later which is not required. I made DH go in for the year test anyway and he will go every year just for my peace of mind. I have seen one too many TLC show, LOL. The table is like the ones they use when we go in for a pap. I held his hand the whole time, guys get nervous with sharp tools around the boys. DH said it didn't hurt at all and wasn't even uncomfortable. We both highly recommend the procedure and our doc whenever the subject comes up.
@tksjewelry: Thank you for your feedback. I will pass it on to FI as it actually answers many of his questions.
Also, I like the warning on our thread. I like how not wanting children is a controversial topic.
@MrsSl82be: A urologist, but all he does is Vasectomies and those types of procedures.
@expecting rain:yeah, pretty much
@tksjewelry: I think I would prefer that as well, someone who only does them or specializes in them. Thanks for the info!
Also ladies, I just put in an idea for a DINKS section, please go vote! http://ideas.weddingbee.com/topic/can-we-have-a-dinks-section
@expecting rain: It is not the wanting of kids or not that is controversial, it is the abortion part. It can be a heated subject whenever that comes up.
yes, some people just can't help but push their views on others, which is probably why she had to come in here about it. Guess my disclaimer wasn't enough...
@MrsSl82be: I like you. :)
And I thought the warning was enough as well. It is just sad that this can't be discussed as adults.
@MrsSl82be: much like real life, eh? Can't go about your life without someone trying to tell you why you should want to have kids.... *sigh*
@expecting rain: haha, thanks! I like you too :)
I just prefer to not have these discussions around pro lifers, cuz they refuse to see your side. To them, you should have your child no matter what. Sorry, the world doesn't work that way. Even some people who say they are pro choice really aren't when you get down to actually discussing it (IRL, I've seen both). Just sad
@expecting rain: haha, thanks! I like you too :)
I just prefer to not have these discussions around pro lifers, cuz they refuse to see your side. To them, you should have your child no matter what. Sorry, the world doesn't work that way. Even some people who say they are pro choice really aren't when you get down to actually discussing it (IRL, I've seen both). Just sad
@MadameTussaud: agreed. which is why I like to respond "my sex life is none of your business!" to those people :)
@WILLIAKELLLB: haha, nice! My bff and I both are trying to find a doc who will do a voluntary hysterectomy...no luck yet :(
@MrsSl82be: I am assuming we got the warning because the comments got flagged which I find happens a lot on here when you are discussing anything other than "I want to have so many BABIEZ!?!? OMG?!?!"
I commented on your suggestion in the support page. I really hope it happens as I would like to talk about the struggles and suggestions with other like minded people.
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