Post # 1
Sorry for the cryptic title. Character limit, and all. haha.
So a long while back, I posted on here (9 months!? Jeesh… I’ve been absent a long time…) this poll about waiting until marriage for sex. ( http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/okay-so-super-big-private-question-you-probably-know-haha#axzz2ZT5R6g3V ) I was mostly curious about Christian posters, as it was a question based on their beliefs. I guess I assume most people wouldn’t wait their whole lives unless they had religious convictions. I understand waiting months or whatnot until the wedding night to make it special, but not just… NOT having sex your whole life, I suppose.
I was interested to see how many girls who were virgins versus their guys, and who were both virgins. I was somewhat surprised to see how many virgins still exist! Especially on the guy side…
My next question is about masturbation. Yep. A step further.
Especially for the virgins, and/or those who have guys who are virgins. How do you feel about masturbation from a Christian, moral perspective? Does your guy masturbate, or do you know? Do you? Does it bother you?
Post # 3
I was a virgin and masturbated (and I’m a Christian). At the time I felt guilty about it. My views are more relaxed now, and looking back I’m glad I did. Not only for the gratification, but because I knew what aroused me once we married. I’ve had regular Os in sex, from the very first night; I very much doubt that would have happened if I hadn’t been experimenting beforehand.
DH masturbated too. I think he still thinks it was bad 🙂
Post # 4
Neither DH or I have found masturbation as acceptable in the light of scripture, the intent of sexual intimacy, lust, or staying pure (not just in body but in mind too). That’s not saying we never have, or that it hasn’t come up in our marriage, but at this point it is something that we have both learned & grown closer to Christ in so it is not welcomed in our marriage and we both abstain (nor was it accepted in the time leading up to our marriage… we both abstained during that time although it has still come up occasionally since then for a portion of time… we had both become complacent & the enemy was able to easy sneak back in in that area).
From what we’ve gotten to experience, it’s really worth completely sacrificing that portion of your own carnal desire to Christ & He’s done some really amazing things in our relationship & hearts individually since we allowed Him to change our worldview on it. 🙂
Post # 5
To rule it out seems a bit harsh, doesn’t it? I mean you don’t get ANY release? No fun allowed at all? Yeesh.
Post # 6
The Bible doesn’t specifically mention masturbation. However, as Christians we are encouraged to: “Deaden,therefore, your body members that are upon the earth as respects fornication, uncleanness, [and improper] sexual appetite.”—Colossians 3:5.
Masturbation fosters a distorted and self-centered view of sex.
This info was provided by http://www.jw.org for more info based on this subject please feel free to visit.
Post # 7
@adavid718: I totally agree with this
one female Preacher once explained it to me in a manner that made me see masturbation in a new light.
she said, the act is not wrong but inorder to achieve the act and the purpose of its intent, we have to create thots in our minds and scenarios that would help us achieve the intent of this act. God would not appreciate these thots…. she went on and I had a moment of clarity.
Post # 8
I am a virgin and so is my FH (yup kinda rare but they still exist, we are also the first and only relationship we both have ever had). My SO and I had a conversation about masturbation and he was the one that brought up that he didn’t feel comfortable with it and felt convicted to stop, so he obviously believes its wrong and hasn’t done it in over 5 years! Without him knowing it, I believed the same thing so we were and are on the same page and we both believe it is wrong (mainly for the reasons PPs have mentioned). I guess we are in the minority, sex isn’t a taboo subject in my relationship though, it has never been with my parents either. It is something we openly talking about in a very healthy way and we’ve made sure to be very educated however we know what boundaries not to cross.
We have never seen each other naked so everything is going to be extremely new when we get married but we’ve decided to just have fun with it and ‘go with the flow’. We’re pretty open with each other and I think if we had problems in that area in the future we would both be willing to just seek help as well as tell eachbother what works and doesn’t etc.