(Closed) "Forced to attend wedding" —> Fmil rant (long)

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
464 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I think she’s just complaining.  My sister got married in Hawaii, a tax writeup for his whole family because of an Amway convention, and we grumbled, but ended up going and having a good time, happy to be there.

Sorry she’s giving you so much grief!  I’d don your sealskin coat and just let her criticisms roll off your back.  Obviously as a self-supporting bride she wouldn’t be able to dictate anything anyway.

Post # 4
Member
737 posts
Busy bee

@gemchick82:  Yup stick to your guns.  Try not to show negative emotions if she mentions anything.  Just say, Oh well… everything is in place now.  It’s your wedding, you should have what you want. 

Post # 6
Member
1785 posts
Buzzing bee

Does she travel other places?  Maybe the idea of travel, even if it’s for an event as special  as her son’s wedding, just is not something she’s comfortable with.  In any event whatever her reason, she needs to respect your decision to have the wedding where you desire. 

Post # 7
Member
4660 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m not into cruises either but geez, I’d just politely decline if I felt the need, not start a fuss about it…

Post # 8
Member
8320 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I think a DW is a big ask for family and friends (I had a DW). In a way for parents it is kind of forcing them because can you imagine the posts if the parents decided not to come? Or the guilt they might feel for not attending.

I think when you choose a DW you need to accept that some people are not going to be happy about it especially if it is going to be tough for them to attend (money/time/life). Your family and friends love you and want to see you get married. It is a big thing to see your children get married no matter how many times they have done it before.

I am not saying you have to change your wedding but I do think you need to accept that DW’s can cause a lot of tension.

 

Post # 10
Member
1785 posts
Buzzing bee

@gemchick82:  Ah, well, so much for the “doesn’t travel” excuse.  Too bad she’s insecure enough that she needs a sidekick around to think she can have fun. 

Post # 12
Member
114 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

We had a DW wedding and had similair responses from family but stick to your gut. We have now received thank you’s from all these people that we had a DW and that it gave them a holiday. It has also given a few of them the travel bug and they are already planning there next holiday 🙂

Post # 13
Member
25 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2015

I would love to attend a wedding like yours!! It sounds awesome! Maybe she is just jealous that that would have been a wedding that she wanted. Or maybe she’s just a sour puss. Don’t worry about her, as long as you and your fiance are happy doing it that way then go for it! It’s your special day so do it the way you guys want 🙂

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