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are you having a caterer? Our caterer was really helpful with those types of numbers. we went with some extra stuff on the tables because I wanted it to look really formal in a dinner on titanic way lol. 
Haha! That is very funny that you just mentioned titanic. Before I wrote that post I was thinking of that scene, where she says to him "just start with the fork on the oustide and work your way in." lol. Very pretty pic:)
If it's not super formal, do the basic knife, fork and spoon for each person and then if you're having soup, get a soup spoon and anything else you might need, such as a seperate spoon/fork for dessert as most people prefer to use separate ones.
It depends on what you are serving. For a salad, entree and wedding cake for dessert I would do 3 forks (1 for salad, 1 for entree and 1 for cake), along with 1 knife for entree and 1 spoon for coffee (or if people want to use it for dessert). You need 1 fork per course served and a knife for anything that would require it such as the entree.
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I have to rent all flatware. So what is necessary for the place setting anyway? Our wedding is not super formal, but not casual either. It seems like there is a separate knife and fork for everything, but do I need it? What about spoons? We aren't having soup, do I still need them? Thanks!