Post # 1
FI and I want to get married sooner than September 2011. We were thinking May 2011.
To save money, we were pondering a Friday evening wedding and reception. Is this a good idea??? Have you ever been to one?
I’ve a friend whose brother married last Sunday. But my church and family being Baptist…hehehehehe that wouldn’t work.
Post # 3
A friday wedding wouldn’t be bad but a lot of guests might not come if they have to travel. A lot of people like to use Friday as their travel day so it’s hard to say how many guests attend. I think it depends on the group/your family and friends.
You would also have to have it later so local people have time to get after work.
Post # 4
Personally I prefer a Saturday wedding, but that doesn’t mean a Friday wedding is BAD. I’ve been to 2, they were like regular weddings. I was also unable to go to one because it was on a Friday and I couldn’t leave work early, so that may effect some of your guests.
Post # 5
From a Friday Night bride, I can give you some pros and cons (my wedding in next month, so this is still pre-wedding advice)
Pros: Cheaper! In our case, by a lot! Night weddings make for a more party-like atmosphere. You also have the rest of your weekend to either a) leave for your honeymoon or b) relax with family. We opted to leave Sunday early morning for our honeymoon to be able to spend more time with the folks who came from out of town.
Cons: You will get comments and there will be people who won’t come. In my case, we said no kids because the ceremony is at 7 pm? That part has been a nightmare. People will try to leave work and scramble to be there, and for that reason you might end up with late comers to your ceremony.
For us, the pros considerably outweighed the cons. It’s a tough decision to make, that’s for sure!
Post # 6
I’ve been to a Friday night wedding, which was held locally, and it was wonderful! I would’ve done a Friday night wedding had most of my guests been local (which they’re not). I think it’s a great way to save money, and still have the weekend left!
Post # 7
As a guest, personally I hate Friday weddings. As a bride I totally understand them 🙂
I’ve had a few friends/family opt for a Friday wedding and it was so annoying. I had to scramble to get there from work to be on time. One of my cousins was furious that I didn’t take off from work in order to be at her ceremony. Then she pitched a fit when she found out I wasn’t planning to go to the reception so I decided to go and then she was mad b/c I came and didn’t go to the ceremony. I’m not saying you would be like that, but make sure you have lower expectations of your guests. If they can’t come, they can’t. If they can come to the reception and not the ceremony and your ok with that, don’t give them a hard time when it happens!
Post # 8
We’re having a Friday evening reception with a bunch of OOT guests (FH’s family), so we’re anticipating a large turnout. But our ceremony/reception is also later in the evening (beginning at 6:30), so it gives people a little more time to go home and change after work. Just be aware that you might get smaller numbers because of travel.
Post # 9
I think it depends, how much do you want all of your oot guests to come? I wanted a small wedding, so having a Sunday wedding was good b/c lots of people couldn’t make it.
Post # 10
@smith2be: So as a Friday bride – I’m going to respond on this comment – not to attack you in any way personally, but to give the OP the feedback she is asking for. I think your cousin (the bride) was out of line to pitch a fit with you, but I see why she was upset. Her approach was the issue IMO.
When considering a wedding on a Friday, expect people to respond like this poster. Do you think you can handle this? (It personally really upsets me.)
Although I wouldn’t say anything to the guest directly, this is the type of behavior that I find completely disrespectful. It’s an invitation, not a demand to attend – but it’s for a WEDDING, not a party. People who show up to the reception only in my opinion are really rude. I feel like if you can’t get the time off to show up on time for the ceremony, you simply should not attend at all. While guests aren’t always ‘into’ the vows, the ceremony is actually the part of the wedding that is the most important and meaningful to the couple. To skip that but show up for food and drinks is just wrong.
Post # 11
@christalynn11: I understand what you are saying about people missing the important part but coming for the “party” but I think when you plan a Friday night wedding you have to be accepting of some of that. These people aren’t skipping the ceremony just because they don’t want to go; they’re missing it due to difficulties getting off work, traffic, getting home and changing, etc (which are due to the time that you chose to have your event). They still want to share in your special day and celebrate with you and are doing so in the only way that is possibile due to their other circumstances.
To the OP: As a guest, I don’t like Friday weddings. If I’m OOT, they require me to take extra time off work when I already get an extremely limited number of vacation days to begin with. And even if I’m in town, they just aren’t feasible to make it to on time very easily. I don’t normally get home from work until 6:00pm so it makes it difficult to change, take the dog out and feed her and get back on the road to make it to an evening wedding, especially one at 6:30pm. DH often has conference calls that run until 6 or 6:30pm, even on Fridays. People can’t just skip that kind of thing to make it to a ceremony. I understand the reasons why some brides choose to have Friday night weddings but they do also have to understnad the dificulties it poses to their guests.
Post # 12
We’re getting married on a Friday. My date (the next day) was booked THIRTY MINUTES before I got to the venue to book. So we opted for Friday and it turned out to be better all around. Not only is it $10/person cheaper, I get to get in there on Thursday and decorate. The bride getting married on Saturday will not have this option since we’ll be there on Friday.
As far as guests complaining of it being on a Friday…complain away. Your snit isn’t going to bother me. And since they are not paying for, they have no say.
Post # 13
@Mrs.KMM: I see your point. This is kind of where it gets tricky – and why I pointed out the concept of turning down an invitation. I think if the bride is going to call people and be upset that they miss the day – then the bride should not have been a Friday bride. However, nearly every single bride who chooses a Friday night actually DOES think about the problems it poses for her guests… it’s sometimes (as in my case) the only option.
I just feel like if you can’t be at the whole thing (i.e. the ceremony and reception) then you should not RSVP ‘yes’
Post # 14
I actully like them better because you still have your whole weekend! I feel like saturday weddings take up a whole day and you cant really get much done.
BUT i can see it being a con if you have a lot of OOT guests.
Post # 15
I prefer saturday weddings overall, but in order to save money, I would definitely choose a Friday wedding over a Sunday wedding. I have to go to a Sunday wedding next month in Baltimore and I’m from Buffalo and I kind of find it annoying, but that’s just me. I’d say go for the friday wedding, do what’s best for you.
Post # 16
Just another thought you might want to consider-
My fiance and I are in our mid twenties and between the two of us were invited to 17 weddings this past year!!! (all but 2 of them required greater than 8 hours of travel) Because of this, we have had quite a lot of time and money spent on car rentals, hotels, and airline tickets and consequently can’t afford a honeymoon.
Depending on your age, you may be at that point in your life where “everyone you know is getting married” in the same year. I think good friends will try to sacrifice as much as possible to be at your wedding to help you celebrate (as we did for most of the ones we were invited to). Unfortunately, if we had had to also take a day off of work, the “cost” of our trip would have nearly doubled. As others previously have mentioned, if most of your guests will be local, this might not be a problem. But for us, finances were the biggest factor in whether or not we could make the trip as those plan tickets add up quickly.
I am sure you have already considered the finance issue, but I brought it up because I honestly don’t think most people will ‘not show up’ because of anger that you picked a Friday, but rather because they have limited time off of work, other financial commitments, etc.