Post # 1
One of my close friends didn’t have to wait. She was engaged after 1 year. I asked her how she felt about this and she said she wasn’t expecting it and didn’t even go through the waiting period at all. She wishes she got the chance to yearn about being engaged to him and playing around with Pinterest.
I am so glad that I am a waiting bee. I am 100% positive it will make the actual moment more savory. My friend has said that the proposal fell in her lap and sometimes she wishes he waited so she could have felt the need to be engaged to him and so it would have made the experience that much more worth it.
Being a waiting bee has helped me pick up new hobbies and learn about myself. Thoughts?
Post # 4
DH proposed to me less than 8 months of dating. I didn’t mind at all; I knew I wanted to marry him very early on. Planning was completely fine, and we had a long engagement so there was plenty of time to figure everything out.
Post # 5
Huh. I’m not a “waiting” type of person and see no value in it. When we knew we wanted to marry each other, we did so.
Post # 6
To each their own. I never heard of the term ‘waiting’ until I saw it on the ‘bee. Each couple has their own timeline.
Post # 7
I had also never heard of “waiting” before the bee and never experienced it myself but I can understand your logic. Like looking forward to a vacation. Glad you’re happy about where you are with your relationship! Enjoy your anticipation!
Post # 8
I would never “wait.” If we know we want to marry each other then there’s no point in waiting.
Post # 9
Yeah, I didnt know waiting was a thing until I came to the bee. I think a proposal is a proposal and is special whether or not you’ve been obsessing over it or annoying the hell out of your SO
Post # 10
@lesliesmithson: I’m sorry but I think posts like these are really harmful and do nothing but pit women against each other. Whether you have to “wait” or not, who cares? One proposal isn’t better than another just because you did or did not have to wait.
I’m happy that you’re really digging the situation you’re in, but insinuating that your proposal will be better or that you’re somehow a better person for having to “wait” is nonsense, and also sets really high expectations that usually leads to all the “I’m disappointed in my proposal” posts I see on these boards.
Like other PPs, the idea of “waiting” was foreign to me before joining the Bee. Aren’t we all basically “waiting” once we find the one we love?
Whether you’re waiting or not, whether you’ve been together for 6 months or 16 years, everyone’s proposal and relationship is special and unique to them and them only. Stop comparing yourself to other women! Be happy for everyone, including your friend! Be strong enough to be truly, unselfishly happy for someone else!
Post # 10
This is such a strange and sad post to me. Once FI and I knew, we knew and didn’t mess around. This life is so short, and isn’t a dress rehearsal. I worry about the bees whose SO’s have been holding onto a ring or dangling bait for many months or even years. I don’t like that you ladies feel like you have to “shut it up” in hopes of speeding along a proposal. It just seems shitty.
Post # 11
leahthehun: just said it all….
Post # 12
FI and I technically “waited” – we held off on getting a ring and announcing our engagement until after I met his out of country parents – by mutual decision. I don’t think it improved or took away from my experience. I can’t see how it would. We were two adults who decided to get married, and then we got a ring and started booking stuff.
You can still pick up new hobbies and learn about yourself after engagement as well, so your friend hasn’t missed that boat.
Post # 13
Proposed to on our one year dating anniversary. Total surprise. Didn’t know I should’ve been waiting? I had no idea! I’m glad nobody held marriage or a ring over my head,that I didn’t have to “shut it up”, and that I wasn’t even thinking about “is he going to ask me”. I’m glad that I was enjoying our relationship without fretting over if/when it would happen.
I highly doubt your proposal will be any better or any more special than mine just because you’re knowingly waiting. And, I certainly did not feel a need to be engaged or propsed to.
Post # 14
My DH proposed to me after 6 months of dating, and we were married after 10 months of dating. I was so happy to be engaged to him, and now I’m so happy to be his wife.
What your friend is feeling is her experience, not everyone else’s who didn’t have to “wait”.
Post # 15
lesliesmithson: I never knew such things ” waiting” until I joined the Bee anywho to each their own. My So propose to me 9 months into our relationship I had no idea he was going to make me his wife. He propose in 2011 next year we will be one as hubby and wife. Just be happy for your friend