Friend Wants to Throw "Stag & Doe" but……

posted 3 years ago in Parties
  • poll: Let him plan it?
    Yes : (6 votes)
    24 %
    No : (3 votes)
    12 %
    Yes, but only if there is no "raising money" component : (16 votes)
    64 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2421 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: February 2015

    I don’t have an issue with a big party like that.  I have an issue with the fundraising (it’s the only reason I really hate Stag and Does).  🙂  So guess what I chose in your poll.  If there’s no fundraising its just a fun party in your honour and a chance for friends to celebrate your upcoming wedding.  

    Post # 5
    Member
    489 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2015

    @CarterLove:  I don’t think it’s ok to have a pre-wedding anything (shower, bachelorette, whatever) where people who aren’t invited to the wedding will be present, it’s rude.  Stag & does are supposed to be fundraising events for an event you’re supposed to host, so they’re never ok.  

    Post # 7
    Member
    489 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2015

    @CarterLove:  Aww! That’s probably the best thing to do, make sure he knows he didn’t do anything wrong you just don’t like what it means (fundraising, etc) and how you don’t want people not invited to the wedding to feel bad! 

    Post # 8
    Member
    11772 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2013

    What if he threw a celebratory party AFTER your wedding, for all the friends who weren’t invited because of numbers? He could still use the venue, still play games…

    Just no money and no pre-wedding party!

    Post # 11
    Member
    1202 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    I wish everybody were as polite as you, but it’s ok to have this party!  It’s ok to even get gifts.  You’re only having a small ceremony and no reception.  Unless I was your best friend, I wouldn’t be offended that I wasn’t invited.   This party gives people an opportunity to celebrate you- if they want to come they will, and if they don’t they can stay home.     

    Post # 12
    Member
    1249 posts
    Bumble bee

    @CarterLove:   I think it is fine since he is throwing the party. I think it is just like showers thrown by family-friends/ church members who are not invited to the wedding.  No pressure.

    Post # 14
    Hostess
    9910 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @CarterLove:  I dislike stag and does in general because I find the fundraising aspect to be inappropriate (personal opinion).  If they want to throw you a pre/post wedding party, I say by all means!

    Leave a comment


    Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

    Find Amazing Vendors