Friends 'disappearing' after engagement

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Did any of your friends 'disappear' after you got engaged?
    Yes : (6 votes)
    29 %
    No : (12 votes)
    57 %
    Yayyy it's almost Friday!! : (3 votes)
    14 %
  • Post # 3
    3735 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @lanibug:  Are you sure it’s not you who’s pulling back?

    Post # 4
    534 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    Are these two friends people with whom you were very close, or were they more casual friends?  If they were good friends, you should be able to talk to them about how you feel.  Don’t blame them for pulling back but definitely tell them you feel like you haven’t seen much of them lately and you really miss their friendship and want to know if everything is okay.

    Post # 5
    114 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    This happened to me too. The two friends in question were not super close friends, per se, as we had fallen out of touch for about 6 or 7 years when they moved across the country but after they moved back we were in the process of getting together/talking more again. Then I got engaged. Friend A’s response was, “Wow, that was fast!” (I’d been dating then-FI for almost 4 years.) The other friend started evading my suggestions to have girls’ nights. Neither of them came to my wedding. That’s really the only part that hurt my feelings, because one RSVP’d yes, never showed, and then texted me a few days afterwards to say she had been sick. Whatever. It is what it is. Your imagination probably isn’t working in overdrive; if you feel like your friends are ignoring you, they probably are. I figured maybe my friends just felt like we were at different points in our lives and we didn’t have much in common anymore, because they’re into going out and trips to Vegas while I’m more of a homebody these days. Maybe that’s the case with your friends. Maybe they’re jealous. Who knows. Just keep reaching out to them now and again; that way, you at least know you tried and they know you still value their friendship.


    Post # 6
    3202 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    Yep, I had a friendship totally end after our engagement. There were a lot of reasons, but I think the engagement was definitely one of them. I think she and her boyfriend of 4 years may have broken up a few weeks ago–she really wanted to get engaged, but he was MUCH younger and was totally not ready for that yet. Her BFF and I both got angaged within a week or two, and I think it was hard for her to deal with. But our friendship was sort of rocky anyway.

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