Friends husband keeps hitting on me. Do I tell my husband??

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
2649 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

EllasGrace20:  Um, when did he hit on you? 

Nothing he did or said amounted to hitting on you, particularly since he did and said everything in front of his wife.  The comment about joining him in the shower was a bit off-color but harmless.  Offering you a ride home or paying you a compliment is not hitting on you. Has it ever occured to you that John is trying to make his wife jealous? Are you trying to make your husband jealous? 

Dont stir up drama. If you are getting a creeper vibe from John then distance yourself.  Make it clear you are not open or receptive to his advances.  If he ever comes out and properly propositions you then shut him down hard and tell him if it EVER happens again you will tell his wife and your husband. 

Post # 4
Member
1021 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

Zhabeego:  Agree. Don’t really see anything here that screams “hitting on me.” He seems like he might just be a little socially awkward and makes some off-color comments and/or doesn’t know when to drop something. Plus, I usually land in the camp of “cheating is anything you do or say to someone one-on-one that you wouldn’t do/say in front of your SO.”

Post # 6
Member
1878 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - Valparaiso, IN

Yes! Tell your husband! Be honest with him! I know my husband would want me to be honest with him about that. It’s not like you have anything to hide. I would venture to say your friends marriage is far from “good”.

Post # 7
Member
2649 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

EllasGrace20:  It’s normal behavior for some men. 

It’s okay you don’t like it but I don’t see where he has come anywhere close to hitting on you.  At worst he’s maybe been a little flirty and lots of people, even those in relationships, are.  Most of the time, it’s completely harmless, sometimes its not.  

If it’s the latter in your situation, you can easily handle this without making it into a huge thing.  

Post # 8
Member
7410 posts
Busy Beekeeper

EllasGrace20:  and that is great for you and your husband. But clearly other people think differently. 

I personally see nothing wrong with what he said. Nothing he said would qualify as hitting on you. He isn’t your husband so you get no say in how he conducts himself. 

Post # 9
Member
4641 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I fail to see how you’re being hit on.. John sounds like he has a perverse sense of humor.

I’d think if he were actually hitting on you, he’d do it out of earshot of his wife. If you don’t like his creepy comments, distance yourself. This is hardly worth starting drama over.

Post # 10
Member
3389 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

What exactly would you tell your husband? what a shitty relationship Tess and her husband have? I agree with pps don’t create an issue here. 

Post # 11
Member
2649 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

MrsWoods47:  If the OP wants to tell her husband some of John’s behavior makes her uncomfortable and she would like to keep her distance, okay – but accusing him of hitting on her when he hasn’t is over the top and unfair. Frankly,  I think she would risk looking foolish to her husband if she gives these examples as being hit on. 

 

 

Post # 12
Member
1926 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I might mention to your husband that some of his comments have made you uncomfortable, but I wouldn’t say he is “hitting on you”.

Some people just act differently. Just because YOUR husband would never act that way doesn’t mean someone else’s husband also doesn’t… it might be perfectly normal for them and just a part of their behavior.

Post # 14
Member
2131 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

FI’s dad has said WAY more inappropriate things to me in front of his wife, son, whole family! I never took it as he was hitting on me, because he isn’t. He’s just wildly inappropriate and thinks sex jokes are the highest form of humor. 

If you don’t like it, don’t hang out with this couple. I know I don’t like it when FFIL says weird/creepy stuff, but unfortunately, I’m stuck with him for the rest of his life.

Post # 16
Member
1244 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

.

Post # 16
Member
2455 posts
Buzzing bee

Just sounds like he was talking to you…

Leave a comment


Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors