(Closed) Friend's lame reason for not attending wedding

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
2376 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I’d say:

“I completely understand, it’s been a crazy few months for us too!  Hope things are going well for you, enjoy the beautiful Spring!”

Post # 4
2759 posts
Sugar bee

@MariContrary:  +1

Not really sure how his response is “lame”. Sounds like something I’d say when I was trying to not hurt someone’s feelings about an invitation I needed to decline due to too many other things on my plate. It’s too bad he can’t make it, but he was polite in his declining your invitation and deserves politeness in return.

Post # 5
1729 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Honestly, he probably doesn’t have enough money to go, and he’s using this lame excuse to not have to say he’s broke. Him not attending buys him time to get a gift together for you.

Post # 6
4439 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall

@littleacorn:  We got some shitty excuses too, it sucks and hurts, but you can’t control other people’s actions so I just say “thanks for letting me know” and move on!

Post # 7
5967 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

@littleacorn:  I get that hearing your wedding got trumped by installing a new deck and redoing the downstairs bathroom sucks, but saying anything other than, “Wish you could come!  We’ll see you later!” makes you look ungrateful.

Post # 8
3697 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@littleacorn:  I understand how every decline feels personal, but I’m sure it’s not.  Maybe you aren’t as close as you think you are.  Or he doesn’t have the cash due to whatever else he already committed to.  Whatever his reason, he doesn’t feel like he can attend.  As has been said, it was just an invitation – his to accept or decline. 

Post # 10
1281 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@littleacorn:  I totally feel ya.  I’ve gotten a couple flaky “no’s” as well.  Just try not to let it sting too much and reply gracefully… it’s all you can do!

Post # 11
5007 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Maybe he has another reason he doesn’t want to tell you (too expensive, family issues, etc). I would just say what the PP mentioned and move on.

Post # 12
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

You’re going to hear a lot of “lame” excuses, especially from more distant high school friends. Best to get the venting out of your system now :-).

Post # 13
37 posts
  • Wedding: October 2013

Yeah, I’m with phillybride on this. He may be terrible at excuse making but something else is going on. Just keep it moving and focus on your loved ones that will be there joyfully with you!

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