Friends not invited anyone else?

posted 3 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
6270 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

friends/acquaintances have asked me about the wedding who are not invited.  when they ask me a question, i answer them in a general sense.  if they press for more info, depending on the question will depend what answer i give.  it is not a secret i am getting married, they are just not invited.  i can’t feel bad, i can’t invite everyone.

i have not had anyone invite themselves to my wedding or expect to be invited from these conversations.

Post # 5
Member
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

It’s a small wedding, they can’t go. End of story!

If anyone bugs me about my wedding, I start getting cranky so I really don’t have any advice there (though being cranky keeps people off my back hahaha)

Good luck!

Post # 7
Member
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@ontbride:  Haha nope! I was going to say before that I’m jealous of your small wedding! It sounds like it’s going to be lovely.

I would love a small wedding, but FI has always dreamed of a bigger one so that’s what we’re doing. It’s not crazy big, might be 100 people tops… but I’d rather elope sooo it’s big to me. 🙂

People will want to hear about all your wedding details no matter whether you’re having a big or small wedding. It doesn’t mean they expect to be invited, but I can totally feel for you… sometimes I get suspicious that those people are fishing for an invite.
I’ve found it helps a little bit to not talk too much about my wedding to people who aren’t invited, even if they ask. It feels mean (well, it makes me cranky, like I said) but saves me a bunch of stress.

Anyway, you just have to stand your ground and remind yourself that it’s just a wedding!
If anyone bothers you about it despite your (perfectly good) explination, at the very least that says something about their character.

Post # 10
Member
9412 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@ontbride:  We are only having my parents – no parents, siblings, family members, or friends. No one has really cared and they are happy we are doing what we want (and saving money!). Obviously we don’t expect gifts.

Post # 11
Member
1243 posts
Bumble bee

@ontbride:  We are having a very small, mostly family (we’ve ended up inviting a few close friends) to our wedding ceremony. I’m talking 20 max.  We are however hosting a large2 evening reception (130 invited, about 100 attending).

None of our friends mind at all.

Post # 13
Member
2318 posts
Buzzing bee

@ontbride:  I think when you make sure to say that it’s a small family wedding, people will understand. Everyone is used to the “oh the venue had strict number limits, our wedding is small, etc etc” but to say that it is specifically a family wedding, wouldn’t hurt my feelings.

Post # 16
Member
2851 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

We are not able to invite all of our friends. We are each inviting a few, but FI has a lot of them. There simply is just not room to fit everyone. We are lucky we are getting to invite them, my parents are already inviting tons of people :/… Hey they are paying for it, the call the shots!

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