Post # 1
My FH asked me if it was ok if his sister invited her friends to the wedding. I cringed and said no. I mean, Im not super-close with his sister and I dont even know her friends. So I thought it was kind of rude, selfish and tacky of her to even ask.
Our wedding is supposed to be intimate and cozy, Im barely inviting famliy so I feel that if Im not inviting my cousins, then I shouldnt invite strangers that are not even someones guest.
While we were out driving last week my FSIL mentioned (slightly angry) that it was effing ridiculous that I invite my boss, but not her BFFs of 9 years. I tried to ignore her but it made me kind of angry.
Am I wrong? Cuz part of me feels bad, and maybe I should give in?
Post # 3
Just wondering, how old is your FSIL? It’s absolutely appropriate to invite your boss. Are you extending the invitation to +1s of single guests? Maybe you can suggest that your FSIL can bring a date if she is worried about not knowing anyone there.
Post # 4
Your wedding is about YOU! You should not have to invite anyone you don’t know to please anyone else. I think eveyone gets torn between inviting people for their parents, friends, sibilings but at the end of the day these are people you are sharing an intimate, special day with and you want to be able to spend as much time as possible with your loved ones.
We had a cell phone policy; they’re not in our cell phones, they’re not on our guest list.
Post # 5
It’s not her wedding.
How old is she? This sounds like something a 16 year old would do. Maybe you should give her an option to bring a guest, which would allow her to bring a friend. But, she isn’t the one getting married. I would assume at her wedding you’re not going to bring YOUR BFF’s.
She’s being ridiculous. It sounds like your FI needs to talk to her and let her know why she’s not allowed to bring her friends that you don’t know.
BTW- Don’t give in. It’s your wedding. If you aren’t able to invite all of your family, she should be allowed to invite her BFFs.
Post # 6
@EAQ219: Shes 25, Im 26 and her brother is 27, so Its not like we are little kids, but she makes everthing about her all the time. Shes just a brat. Not a cute brat, a mean one! And I am doing the +1 to singles. But its not like shes not going to know anyone there, more han half of the guest are her family! And once upon a time we used to be friends. So she knows my friends.
@Katgar17: hahah no cell phone policy sounds great! Our parents have been really good about the guest list, even the moms! Its just her.
@Miss Stellar: My FI probably has! Thats why she said it to me when he wasnt there. If it was 1 BFF I woulndt even mind but its 6!!! Who has that many best friends?
Thanks for the advice ladies! Much appreciated:) xo
Post # 7
OK, girl, you need to push her in front of a bus. 25 years old?!? And wants to bring her 6 "BFFs" to YOUR wedding?! Oh, lord. I feel for you, I really do. I’d suggest having an adult conversation about it with her, but I fear that she’s probably not mature enough for one.
ps, I’m only kind of joking about the bus thing.
Post # 8
Hahahhaha, I just burst out laughing in front of my boss! I have those Ally McBeal moments all the time!
Post # 9
@Katgar17: I’m officially adopting the cell phone rule!! LOL
If you aren’t inviting your cousins, don’t feel bad about not inviting TOTAL strangers. She is a brat!! Forget about her. She may brood about it, but you don’t even have to give it a second thought!
PS-It’s your FIs job to make sure she understands the reasons, not yours. She definitely shouldn’t have even brought it up!!
Post # 10
My sister is inviting her BFF to my wedding but her BFF will be her +1. So maybe you can spin it that way.
Post # 11
Ya, but there are 6 BFFs… so what to do with the other 5?
Post # 12
How insane– how about thanking her graciously for planning and paying for your wedding… and then throw in since we’re having a bigger wedding now thanks to you maybe I will invite my friends too— And do it with a straight face….
Would she invite strangers to her house for dinner???
Post # 13
How about a compromise? I remember how much fun weddings were when I was young and single… who doesn’t love a good wedding? Maybe her friends could come later, like after dinner for dancing. I can understand why you’d want to keep the ceremony and dinner intimate for close friends and family. Most of my guests scattered after dinner… I would have welcomed a few more people on the dance floor!
Post # 14
Don’t give in. It’s rude and inappropriate for her to ask you to invite her friends (who you don’t even know!).
When she has her wedding she’ll hopefully realize how rude it is and apologize for it.
Post # 15
Don’t give in. What a brat! Even a compromise is ridiculous. Speak to your FMIL if she doesn’t give up. Man, some people! How obnoxious!
ps I LOVE that you referenced Ally McBeal!
Post # 16
Tell her to pick one, not six. That way it will be her problem now because she’ll have to choose on one of them. Remember it’s not a house party, it’s a freaking wedding!!!! What if you wanted to invite 6 of your BFF to her wedding. How would she feel?