Friendship Frustrations!!! (Vent, a little long sry!)

posted 3 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
Member
1147 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@veryberry13:  I have a very close friend who maks decisions that can drive me up a wall sometime. for example introducing guys she’s “just sleeping with” to her children, having sleep overs at this guys house, etc. I was pissed because I thought she was putting her kids in a bad situation & being selfish. Luckily she’s moved past all of that and now has a really great guy in her life etc… but it seriously used to stress me out. I finally had to ask myself, “is what she’s doing hurting ME in anyway? How does it affect MY life?” and when the answers were “no and it doesn’t affect my life” I had to let it go. Life is too short to be bothered by other peoples decisions who you don’t agree with. It’s a very liberating experience when you get to the point where you aren’t going to let other peoples lifestyles/actions/work ethic bother you.

Post # 4
Member
615 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@ThePrincessBride10612:  I lOOOOVVVEEE WHAT YOU SAID.

I have to remind myself of this constantly. Thanks for putting it so eloquently.

Post # 6
Member
1503 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I hate when people come into the office who are sick. That does affect OP’s life because now she could get sick. Just stay home and keep your germs to yourself, bleh.

Post # 9
Member
1503 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Some people just like to complain and nothing is ever good enough. My mother can be this way and I agree–it can be very draining to listen to/deal with.

And ick! Sanitize that phone, haha. I have a co-worker that is always sick. He comes to work and whenever he leaves the room I sanitize his area and anything that he could have touched. ICK.

Post # 10
Member
6964 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

@veryberry13:  Yeah none of this is anything for YOU to be upset about. People go into work when they are starting to get sick all the time. You go in while you feel like you can handle it and then don’t go in when you’re floored a couple days later. This is completely normal behavior. And why are you worried about how she was rude to her parents? That has absolutely nothing remotely to do with you. And maybe she’s a shitty owner, but again- it’s not like it’s YOUR dog. She’s going to pick up her dog and then go out to eat. Sucks for the dog, but if it needed constant care I’m sure the vet would tell her that. 

You are going to give yourself an ulcer if you get worked up about a bunch of crap that has nothing to do with you. Save your energy for your own problems.

Post # 12
Member
6964 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

@veryberry13:  I would say something like “Well, yeah, I see why you feel guilty. Now you know better next time!” She WANTS you to say it’s not her fault and ease her guilt. If you become the person who is going to tell her, “Yeah, you’re a bitch” (in a nicer way, obviously) she will stop going to you for validation. 

Post # 13
Member
1147 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@veryberry13:  I totally understand how exhausting friends like this can be. On the bright side she considers you a close enough friend that she feels comfortable complaining to you =) But the downfall of that is that you get all of her issues dumped on you when she wants to complain. The same friend I was talking about earlier, I used to ask her, “Do you want my opinion or do you just need me to listen.” Most of the time she just wanted me to listen, which was okay but it can be totally overwhelming! Sometimes distance is the best thing (but I’m not sure how easily you can do that w/you two working together.) Good luck! 

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