Post # 1
DH and I are coming up on our third anniversary in January, and have been TTC since July. Sometimes it just seems like the world is out to prevent us getting pregnant! The first month we started, my mother was visiting and had to stay longer than planned, making it hard for us to be *ahem* alone very often. August and September we got in good tried, but in October my husband got sick right before I ovulated. My poor husband has always struggled with “finishing” when he is sick, and it sometimes lasts a while after the fact. It was a full month before he was back to normal, which meant our chances were shot for November, too.
This month we were really hopeful. I chart, and I also began using OPKs last month. Yesterday my husband started getting sick again, and yesterday I got a positive OPK. I also had more fertile quality cervical mucus (ewcm) than I have in ages. He did his best, but was not able to finish. Today he doesn’t even feel like trying, and I am likely going to ovulate tonight.
I am so disappointed and so frustrated! It has been 6 months, and I just really thought it would happen a lot more easily for us. I know it can take up to a year for healthy couples, but if he keeps getting sick at the wrong time (he has never had a great immune system) I don’t know what we’re going to do.
Has ANYBODY been through anything similar? I’d love any to hear any suggestions you might have, but honestly I just feel so let down.
Am I alone in this particular problem??
Post # 3
I’m not TTC yet, but sending a hug your way! This is Murphy’s law. He should wash hands, avoid sick people, get enough sleep, eat healthy, and be up to date on vaccines. Otherwise, not much you can do. Hope it works out soon!
Post # 4
@missrain: you are not alone. We’ve been ttc for 7 cycles…this will be 8 and we’ve had some very similar issues. We had out of town guests, I had to travel for work, I had to leave town suddenly b/c my sister who got accidentally pregnant was in labor, and he has issues finishing at times. It can be so frustrating and lonely. I feel all panicky if I’m going to O and we don’t have good timing and then I spend 2 weeks deciding if this pain or that cramp could mean what I hope it means. You are definitely not alone.
Post # 5
I’ve been having a tough time with this too, but honestly, I rather be in your position and at least know I’m ovulating and have a chance to even try. I got off BC almost 4 months ago, got my withdrawal bleed and then one ‘normal’ period 4.5 weeks later I think and then nothing. I’m on CD71 now, no sign of ovulating, or anything.
Post # 6
@guitargirl: Thanks for the virtual hug! I will try to keep DH from getting sick again. Maybe we will have better luck in 2013.
@august05: It is especially frustrating considering how many times we worried over getting pregnant when we were preventing. If I had known it would be so hard you can bet I would have pushed to TTC a lot sooner! I hate to say “glad I am not alone”, because it sucks that anyone else is dealing with this, too. But I am glad somebody knows what I am going through! Thanks for your comment!
@pinkshoes: I’m sorry you are struggling with your cycle. I struggled with really long cycles for a while after going off BCP, so I can empathize. For me, dietary changes and lunaception helped get my cycle back on track. Good luck!
Post # 7
@missrain: DH and I have been together for 12 years. His brother made a comment before we were even TTC and he said “Geez yall have been together so long, you should have probably had an oops baby by now, I hope nothing is wrong with you”…..well now that’s all I can think of. I have times where I seriously am mad that we waited to TTC until after we got married until after school and jobs and house. I know it’s irrational, but i keep thinking “we missed our shot”
Post # 8
@august05: Dh’s brother sounds like a real sensitive guy. I have had similar worries about not having an oops baby, but then I remind myself of all the couples I know who didn’t have oops babies and were able to successfully conceive later. We’ll get there, too…I am hopeful. Lately I have been wondering what we’ll do if/when we reach a year, though.
Post # 9
@missrain: sorry you are struggling – it’s not fun. if you do get to a year with no bfp, make sure you’ve kept track of the months that you were unintentionally ‘not trying’ so that you don’t get over-medicated or over-investigated for no reason – some medications can actually interfere with good baby-making 🙂 at the moment it looks like you’ve only been able to try 2 or 3 times in 6 months…
also, my hubby was often sick this year, because he has IBS and that seems to have killed off his immunity. My Naturo has been working on improving his health too, and he hasn’t had a cold since.
Post # 10
You are not alone!
We are on Cycle 3 of trying and I too feel like it’s never going to happen. My husband suffers from what the doctors can only label as “IBS”. He has a whole slue of issues and basically because the doctors are unsure of what it is, they unofficially ended up labeling it “IBS”. The problem that we have is that he is often in the bathroom for HOURS at a time. I do everything I can to make him aware of my fertile days. I remind him, mark it on the calendar etc. I was expecting him to be mindful of what he eats/drinks etc. during these VITAL days to help ease any symptoms he may have. Unfortunately it appears that I am wrong. He does nothing to increase his chances of being less symptomatic which ultimately results in us not having intercourse enough (or at all) during the fertile days. I am so extremely frustrated but feel bad blaming it on my husband as I realize he has very little control over the illness itself. I just wish he would understand my frustration and at least make an attempt to make it work.
Good luck and well wishes for a better year in 2013 to all those Bees TTC