- 6 years ago
*I’m halfway venting/halfway asking if anyone is or has been in this situation before*
My SO is obsessed with becoming a pro gamer… He is 22, just graduated college with an engineering degree and is starting his first real job on Monday in engineering. He has been playing this game longer than I’ve known him (we’ve been dating 1.5 years). He has always played this game and ALWAYS gets irrationaly mad whe he loses because he wants to be a pro. It’s ridiculous. It’s like his happiness is ONLY dependent on how he does in the game. It wouldn’t be so bad if he didn’t take it out on me or objects around him.. He smashes computers, breaks tables, punches walls, and calls me a bitch when I get upset at him smashing things.. all because his elo is getting lower.
I’ve talked with him about how his anger outbursts make me feel.. then he uninstalls the game for a few days and swears never to play it again. That doesnt fix the problem because he re-installs it then has his anger outbursts. His anger honestly ruins our relationship and I don’t know what to do about it anymore. I am so unbelievably frustrated.. why can’t he just enjoy playing just for playing? Why is a 22 year olds highest hope to become a pro gamer..? He will try to get better then just give up and revert back to being his angry self. He was treated terribly by his father growing up and thats what I attribute his anger issues to… but he is like Jekyll and Hyde honestly. I’m starting medical school in the fall.. I’m not sure if I want to deal with this the rest of my life. I truly believes he plays games all day because he ‘has nothing better else to do’ and he thinks whatever I suggest us to to is boring and he’d rather play… I’ve always thought that once we start a family that he will then have something better to do with his time like work, and take care of the children but man…… what if it doesn’t change? what if he gets angry all the time the rest of his life?
I’m really making him out to be a terrible person.. he’s really great when he doesn’t play games and is entertained.. which rarely happens. I can never find anything that he wants to do with me to replace video games in his life.. I’m startig to believe that i deserve more.. does the “ah-ha this is the ONE” moment really exist? arent relationships supposed to be better than this or is this just happening because he really doesn’t have anything else to do?
Have any of you been in this situation?? It doesn’t hurt me to deal with this… It’s just so freaking frustrating.