- 3 years ago
Ugh, just so sick of waiting…i think it started to bother me more when i turned 30, SO is going to be 36 in a month…..
i was expecting a proposal in the early part of this year when we went on vacation to our favourite resort in Mexico, so much so that i had been eyeing this wedding dress that i fell in love with, and caved and bought it because i didn’t want to miss out on it! i must have jinxed myself, because 3 days after i bought it ( online, so i didn’t have it yet) his younger brother proposed to his gf of 3 years ( we’ve been dating for 4.5 years!)….This all happened in March.
my heart sank, i knew that if he had had anything planned out, he wouldn’t want to “steal his brother’s thunder”, so i’d be waiting longer…..i was so upset…and he knew it….he repeatedly asked me if i was annoyed with him the day we found out about the proposal, and i said YES! he told me not to be mad, that our turn was coming soon, but he said soon a year ago! i mean, i’ve been so good, i NEVER nag at him, and we both know marriage is what we want, so i know we are on the same page and i’m not just assuming things!
and to top it off, they are getting married in Mexico, right next to the resort we wanted to have ours at one day, now i feel like we can’t also have a destination wedding because the whole family has “been there, done that”, and his parents don’t like the heat in the first place….it just feels like everyone has been getting everything i wanted, while i just get to sit on the sidelines….
so after that, SO tried to talk about rings and marriage stuff a little more, because he had kind of stopped discussing stuff with me altogether earlier, and i had told him that was making me think he wasn’t even thinking about it anymore! but his talk of marriage and rings has died off again…and i keep hoping it’s because he is planning something and wants to surprise me, so i’m trying to keep quiet and not nag and not bring up rings or anything wedding-y!
he’s the kind of guy who is going to want to surprise me with something amazing, even though i’ve told him i don’t need anything flashy, expensive, complicated, or public! i’ve even told him and shown him moissanite rings i love, or other rings that i think are reasonable, and his response is always “well, it’s not a diamond” or “it’s not big enough” or ” i’m not buying any future wife of mine a ring from a mall jeweller!”….well, that’s great and all! fabulous in fact if you want to spoil me, but if it’s just going to prolong things, i don’t care! i just want to be married to the best man i’ve ever known!
*grumble* but i’ll wait, for this guy, i’ll wait as long as i have to, because i’d rather be with him and not married than with anyone else! 🙂