Frustrated today just thinking about my year so far…

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
720 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I feel ya. My SO and I seriously started talking about engagement last August. In November or so he started talking about rings. And made me feel like it was really coming soon. We’ve gone on a few trips, there have been lots of opportunities, and still, nothing. A year later and I feel like we haven’t moved forward much at all (except on the ring thing – I know he’s doing his best there). 

I also feel you about the sibling thing. My SO and I are 24, but his brother and his SO are 32 and 28, respectively. They’ve only been dating for a year and a half, while we’ve been dating 5.5 years at this point. His brother and his SO are going to get engaged soon too – and they want to have their wedding at his family’s beach house in Rhode Island. When I found this out, I thought I was going to faint. My SO and I have been planning for longer than they have been together to get married at his beach house in RI. I swear, I don’t usually get angry at other people getting married or engaged (especially not people I love, like my future brother-in-law), but this really got to me. Now, I feel like it’s a race to get engaged so that we can lay our claim to the venue first. I just don’t want to get married in the same place as they do not long after they do. 

Anyway, I don’t know if I really have an advice other than just keep on keeping on. Sounds like you’re doing a much better job than I am at not talking about it and/or nagging your SO. I’m sure in a few more months both of us will look back and think we were so silly to be that upset. But right now, it’s hard. Especially when you (like me) don’t even CARE about the ring or the proposal or any of that. Ugh. You have my sympathies!

Post # 5
Member
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

In many ways, this has been a good year so far. I got to volunteer in Guatemala and I got into a grad program. DBF got a great new job and visited me in Guatemala and Belize, where we had a great time.

however, he was thinking of proposing in February, and pushed it back. So if it doesn’t happen, I’m afraid this won’t be,”the year L lived in Guatemala” or “the year A got that job” but “the year we didn’t get engaged”

Post # 6
Member
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

And I mean February 2013, the one that already happened, not February in six months.

Post # 9
Member
2395 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@totalchaos58:  we both know marriage is what we want, so i know we are on the same page and  i’m not just assuming things!

Really?  How do you know that?  If he really wanted to marry you, he would.  Why do you want to wait around for someone who doesn’t seem to want to commit?

Post # 11
Member
703 posts
Busy bee

@totalchaos58:  I can totally relate to your story! I turned 30 in dec and my waiting impatience stepped up a notch! I get frustrated. My SO is 33 we’ve just passed our 3 yr anniversary. We talk about marriage the type of wedding we’ll have,kids etc. I really did well shutting it up but like you when other ppl get engaged I can feel my mood change! So has told me to be patient and do I not want to be surprised?! etc.  that’s all well and good but I want to get on with my life, our life, I don’t want to be under serious pressure to have kids and like you I feel that most ppl in my circle now have been there and done that when it comes to weddings!  Like your SO my SO was preoccupied with other things he’s renovating his place we just upgraded our cars. I really don’t think they can think of more than one thing at once!

we’ll both get there! I don’t think our SO’s are in anyway misleading, yours sounds like a great guy. I think a lot of guys need to have all their ducks lined up first! 

Post # 13
Member
4483 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

@Bettyboo1982:  mine says the same thing. No, I don’t really care about being surprised, to be honest

Post # 14
Member
703 posts
Busy bee

Lol it’s so annoying! I told him yes the day can be a surprise! The surprise should be whether its gonna be 6 months a year or 2 years away!

Post # 15
Member
703 posts
Busy bee

Shouldn’t be I meant to type!!

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