FSIL always wants to do things with FI… without me

posted 2 years ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
1103 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I frequently see my sisters without their husbands, but I feel like that’s different!  We never ask for them not to be there, they just don’t want to go, ha!  Also, I would never expect either to pay for me, we always split the bill or trade turns paying, that’s the part I see in this as being wrong.  He needs to ask for split checks or say something in the beginning of the meal next time. 

Post # 3
Member
8425 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

She pouted the entire time and didn’t look at me.

<div style=”overflow: hidden; color: #000000; background-color: #ffffff; text-align: left; text-decoration: none;”>lolalulu_24:  How old is his sister?  This is strange behavior.</div>

Post # 6
Member
461 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Definately does not sound right to me!! She seems quite possessive of her brother. 

Post # 8
Member
1888 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

lolalulu_24:  it’s a little weird. I have one on one time with my sister all the time but we don’t deliberately exclude my fiance and her boyfriend, in fact sometimes we end up in a group of three when either my fiance or her guy can’t make it. Your fiance needs to have a chat with his sister and tell her that while they can still hang out one on one once in a while, he isn’t going to deliberately exclude you and discourage your from coming along, and if she has a problem with that, she can always cancel the outing.

Post # 9
Member
8425 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

lolalulu_24:  I think you need to talk to you FI about this, she needs to respect you as his partner and if he continues allowing her to behave like this he’s just enabling her.  Does she not have other friends, or is she desperately lonely or something?

Post # 11
Member
1737 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2014 - 13th ~ TN

lolalulu_24:  When I first saw your post I was thinking “man, what a b*tch for not wanting her FI to spend time with his sister”, because, as an older sister I know I would get upset if I wanted to do something alone with my brother and my SIL acted like b*tch about it.

Then I read your post. Now all I can think about is the Friends episode with Rachel dating Danny (the Yeti) and his sister. Tickle fights, and taking a bath together. Ewww!! In the episode Rachel asks Ross and Monica about their closeness and they get in a wrestling match, that would be more me and brother. But not even that these days, 1) we are too old, 2) I would never even play fight with someone with PTSD.

Anyway, this does not seem right, your FI needs to talk to her.

Post # 12
Member
2065 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

lolalulu_24:  shes jealous of you. my first thought. she doesnt want to share her brother with you. if it were my brother yeah i might go to dinner without his girlfriend but if she wanted to come i would totally be happy to have her. whats she gunna do if you two have kids. invite them and your husband and leave you at home?

Post # 14
Member
6507 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

Meh, I don’t think it’s weird that she asks to hang out alone once a month. 

I do pay for my brother when we go out but he is still in college and lives paycheck to paycheck. Since I’m financially comfortable I offer to pay. However, in this situation I would tell your FI to ask the server to split the checks from now on.

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