(Closed) FSIL drama is coming…need help

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
2247 posts
Buzzing bee

Oh honey, I am almost in the same boat as you.  I despise both of my FSILs.  They don’t like me, either, I don’t think.  I’m planning to have FCIL as a BM, but I’m not asking FSILs.  I know they’re going to be pissed.  FMIL will probably be mad, too.  But, I’m not having people who hate me in my wedding!  If I were you, I’d stick to my guns.  Don’t allow her to be in your wedding when she treats you so awfully.  That will end up ruining your special day.  If she gets mad and confronts you, tell her exactly why you did not ask her.

Post # 4
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

I was in the same boat, except I chose to ask her to be in the wedding, and it was a huge mistake! Stick to your guns.

Post # 5
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

Discuss the potential problems now with your fiance so you are both on the same page.

Have a canned response that you both tell anyone when or if it comes up.

Just say “Sister hasnt spoken to me in over a year and she has demonstrated to us that she doesnt approve of our relationship. If I am wrong I would love for her to come and talk to me” And don’t give examples, or justify or defend. Just stick to that- both of you.

 

Post # 6
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Accept people for who they are and not who you want them to be. She doesn’t mean well for you. So have your wedding as drama free as it can be expected without her being involved. I’m sure SOMETHING will come up no matter how dipolmatic you try to be. So just keep planning your day and ignore the hater.

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