- 6 years ago
- Wedding: May 2012 - Salvage One, Chicago
I almost posted about this a few days ago, I thought we had won the battle, but now something else came up and we’re fighting in a war. Sorry this is a little long.
Mr. Bing had been growing his lovely, thick, curly brown hair for more than a year. It now sits on his shoulders, he has a healthy ponytail, etc. It started as an idle notion and now he really likes it long and when he does cut it (probably for our wedding in May) he’s going to donate it to Locks of Love. I’ve measured it, it’s about 9 inches long when straight and right from his scalp. I think the donation length is 10″. He is standing up in her wedding.
SO- the Future Sister-In-Law has made it known she doesn’t like his hair for months. She passive-aggresively asked her mom to ask him to cut it for the wedding. He ignored it because he felt if she wants him to do something, she should ask him herself. She’s getting married next weekend. Last weekend we had a family dinner and at the verrrry end, in the parking lot, she asks him when he’s cutting his hair. He said ‘for our wedding’ (meaning his and mine). She asks, “Do you mean OUR wedding?” (meaning hers) and then starts in on how it would be ‘distracting’ and that it ‘sends a message’ (no one could offer up what this message is, however). She even threw the word ‘hippie’ in there when Mr. Bing is the exact opposite. Anyway, she and her parents are really set on making him cut his hair. He told her he would tie it back, but product in it, that it would look really nice. Not that it has ever looked bad- he has great hair and it’s always washed, combed, de-frizzed, etc. We just went to a wedding where he pulled it back and from the front you can’t even tell. And really, is his ponytail going to distract from her in a big white dress at her wedding??
We thought this was over once he calmly told her that he wants to donate it, it’s not long enough yet, and he doesn’t want to cut it. We just got am email from his parents, who are divorced but presenting a unified front on this topic, saying that they want to meet to discuss ‘family issues related to the wedding’. I feel like we’re in trouble for being ourselves. And further more, I think it’s extremely rude that they want to make him change for one day, in effect saying that they don’t like him how he is, and that he needs to alter himself in order to be accepted socially at this wedding. For the record, Mr. Bing is almost 30, has a fantastic, professional job, is extremely smart and independent, dresses well, etc. He’s not some wayward dirty kid needed to be forced into a suit.
So, we’re supposed to meet with them tomorrow night. I can only hope they see reason on this. I also hope I haven’t committed some unknown faux pas they are upset about. Mr. Bing is standing up in the wedding, I’m not involved in hers at all, nor is she in mine. I also really like my Future Sister-In-Law, we hang out as couples a lot and she’s level headed except when it comes to this! I get all angry when I think about it…ok, thanks for letting me vent!