- 4 years ago
- Wedding: July 2012
I just need some words of encouragement. I know I’m already doing all I can, and getting the best advice but the reality of it is so hard and I keep waiting for things to get easier.
My twins turned 3 weeks old on Wednesday, their official due date….thus they were born at exactly 37 weeks. Neither can latch without a shield, tandem feeding is just out of the question, as each of them needs alot of stimulation and individual attention to nurse effectivley….I’ve struggled with finding a routien that works for us until they get the hang of breastfeeding. My goal at first was to EBF, tandem feed….but come to fidn out, according to lactation nurses, pediatrican, etc, that’s a pretty ambitous goal for a FTM of twins, especially one without help at home. But of course I get to hear stories from everyone about mom’s of twins and triplets who somehow managed to EBF, blahblahblah….most of these stories are not about FTM’s I’ve noticed, and maybe that’s part of my issue is lack of patience and experience, who knows.
Anyways, we started supplementing in the hospital…. after alot of aggresive work to get my milk to come in it finally did after a few days at home. Basically all I have been able to manage is BF’ing one twin, bottle feeding formula to the other and alternating the twins at each feeding. I pump to stock up on breast milk at night but it never seems to be enough…my supply seems good but these boys are hungry, hungry hungry and I cant’ keep up. I can’t stay awake to breastfeed at night as we are still dealing with a few nights here and there of cluster feedings….given all the attention and stimulation they need, I find myself falling asleep during feedigns and the twins getting nowhere so I bottle my breastmilk for hte night and they get about half breast milk and then I supplement and ounce or two of forumula if they aren’t satisfied.
One twin never seems satsfied, the other may have some reflux issues, he spits up after each meal. It’s helped by taking frequent breaks, burping, etc during feedigns, keeping him upright, etc…but given that I’m only one person, I often have to rely on others to help me get all that done and I think there is some inconsistency. Doctor said the reflux should go away without any treatment and unless hes forcefully vomiting more than once a day, or not having wet diapers I shouldn’t worry. My family acts like there is something wrong with him because he spits up a little after he eats…..and his brother only does it a couple times a day….I sware everyone is hell bent on making me feel like I’m doing a crap job….also I get alot of suggestions from everyone that might as well give up on bf’ing….it’s too hard, too time consuming, etc.
I am not quite ready but I am frustrating…soemthing that supposed to be so natural is causing me so much stress. I had images of grabbign my babies at night to breastfeed in bed with me and placing them bac k in their bassinet….but the reality is me pulling out sheilds, strippin them down to their diapers, getting in the perfect seated position in a chair, getting the baby into a perfect postion holding one breast and massaging it until my arm falls asleep, holding babies head with the other….periodically stimulating them to stay awake, or helping them to re-latch…over and over.
Also, my brilliant routine of bf’ing one twin and bottle fedding the other during the day has gone to shit….as I don’t have help all day long, and how can I possibly bf eitehr twin when the other wtin is screaming their head off because he wants to be held.
Yes, I am seeing a lactation nurse, I am taking all their advice….but it’s still so hard. It was determined each twin is getting at least and oz to and oz.5 in a 20 min feeding (per those nifty scales they have at the lactation office)….so I know they are drinking, but another issue is they never seem satsfied with just my milk.