Post # 1
I’m already starting to freak out about going back to work and my little bean isn’t even HERE yet! :'( My mom just moved to our city and she’s going to be watching the baby after I go back to work and Darling Husband goes back to school, so I know I’m VERY lucky in that sense…I just hate the idea of going back to work at all.
I’m VERY lucky in the fact that my boss is flexible and understanding, but I can’t take advantage of that and burn any bridges…even if I want to 😉
Any words of wisdom? Advice? Anyone want to chat about it?! GO! 🙂
Post # 3
I am afraid that it’s just plain hard to leave your first baby with someone else. But you need to tell yourself that you are getting the best of both worlds, working mom and stay at home mom. Your baby is gaining time with his grandma and won’t be missing out on a stay at home. Usually we parent very much like our own did. I am really jealous as my mom lived across the country and my kids only saw her once a year. not saying it won’t be hard and you won’t feel guilty cause you will, we all do. I made sure to have little rituals during the day as my kids got older, a phone call a few times a day, a note for their nap that kind of thing:)
Post # 4
I unfortunately had to go back when Dirty Delete was only 7 weeks, it was the hardest thing I had to do. I also had my mom, Mother-In-Law and Darling Husband had one day that they took turns watching her and I knew she was in great hands. However that was a very short time and being at work thinking about all the things I should have been doing that they were getting to do made me really upset, I even missed her first time rolling over, thankfully Darling Husband was watching her and took video and sent it to me, but it def. hurt as a mom, I couldn’t wait for weekends and holidays. This time around I am due around the same time and I plan on staying home longer bc I don’t want to go through the heartache, but I do know that money doesn’t just grow on the tree so I can’t take too much time off. But to make you feel better I did survive and she is happy and healthy and I am thankful that I did have family to watch her.
Post # 5
My daughter started daycare when I went back to work at 12 weeks. She goes there 3 days/week and stays with her grandparents the other 2. I feel very fortunate for those 2 days. I won’t lie. The first day was hard. But I was ok after that. I guess my one tip is to leave your little one for brief periods before you have to go back to work. I think it would be much harder if you had never left the baby and then suddenly did for an entire day. Oh, I guess I have 2 tips. If you can, try to go back to work mid-week. Making it through 2 or 3 days may seem like something you can handle. Five may seem like an eternity. Good luck!
Post # 6
@bricon: I was afraid we wouldn’t have the option to have familly watch him, but my mom is actually moving back from California to KS for the baby (she’s single and has been wanting to get her master’s degree, so this is a win-win for us all). I love your advice on leaving little notes and having little rituals. I’m close enough that I can come home for lunch. I’m also really hoping I can work out working from home part-time. I think if I could work mornings at the office then come home a couple/few days a week that it would be SO much more bearable.
@ms sweets: Ugh, the rolling over story is what I’m most afraid of. I don’t want to miss his “firsts” 🙁 My Dad gave us a video camera for Christmas so I’m really hoping it works out that my hubby and my mom can work out video taping ALL day EVERY day. 🙂
@candicemcc: Good call on getting out a little during my maternity leave and going back mid-week. I’ll for sure talk to my boss about that!!!
I can’t thank you girls enough for your support. Even just knowing that other people have the same issue makes me feel better…I’m not alone in this.
I have a close group of girlfriends, 4 of the 6 of us are pregnant/having babies and I’m the ONLY one going back to work so that’s making it even harder because they have this amazing gift and I don’t think ANY of them appreciate it the way I would. And maybe that’s only because I know I can’t, but damn I wish I could…*sigh.
End rant. 😉
Post # 7
I am now working full time, I have a 4 year old and a nearly two year old.
The best thing in the world for me is that I love nest door to my parents. A lot of people freak out at the thought of that, but we are very careful not to live in each others pockets, and my mother has been a god send. I literally would not be able to work without her. I do shoft work and she stays with the kids for the 2 – 3 hour gap between my partner going to work and me getting home.
My kids also go to day care two days a week, for the days when I am on day shift.
I am also fortunate that my boss is awesome, and when I was in a hard sport where my partner was away, my mother was in Sydney and my sister couldnt get time away from her own family. They did everything they could to make it work for me.
My advice is to ask for help if you need it. Some people refuse to and try and struggle through. Find yourself a support network, and have people you can use as backs ups. So that way if you usually rely on your family and they suddenly can’t help for whatever reason, you already have some sort of process in place to fall back on without to much stress.
Post # 8
I teach Pre-K in a daycare, so my daughter comes to work with me, but I was STILL nervous. she had’nt been away from me for a lont time, never mind 4hrs! (I visit her at lunch.) As we settled in the routine, it got better.
You are going to miss your baby, but it does get better. Take comfort your mom is watching her. I wish my mom could, but she lives an hour away.