Post # 1
Darling Husband and I spent this afternoon at my IL’s house. My BIL/SIL and their two boys, ages 8 and 5, were also there.
So when we first got there, SIL told the 5 year old (Caden) to be really gentle with me (he’s usually one that likes to tackle) because I have a little baby in my tummy (I’m 32 weeks pregnant).
The conversation that followed, verbatim:
SIL: Caden, remember to give Aunt Sarah really gentle hugs so you don’t hurt the little baby in her tummy.
Caden: You have a baby in your tummy?
Me: Yes, I do.
He looks at me for a long minute, scrunches his face up, and puts his hands on my belly.
Caden: Why did you eat it?
Me and SIL couldn’t stop laughing.
He then proceeded to tell his brother, BIL, Darling Husband, Mother-In-Law, Father-In-Law and DH’s aunt that I have a baby in my belly, and I ate it. SIL told me they’ve been working up to the “how babies are made/grow” conversation, but he’s been having trouble grasping it. She kept telling him today that I’m growing a baby in my body like she grew him in hers, but the “tummy” part really threw him off.
Seriously the best part of my day.
Anyone else have any funny kid quotes they want to share?
Post # 3
I was thinking about this one recently –
when my brother was younger, he had trouble with tr- and fr- words.
So one morning he asked my mom if he could have f****** Flakes for breakfast. Then after Christmas service at church, our pastor asked him what Santa brought him.
“a dum f***” (dump truck)
my parents were pretty mortified.
Post # 4
@hisgoosiegirl: My stepsister’s first word was “fruck”. The story goes that they were trying to teach her to say “truck” but we’ve always been a little skeptical…
Post # 5
Yeah haha when my brother was 15 months or so he would tell everyone “I want to see a titty!”
We finally figured out that he was talking about the stray cat that sometimes came around the house, he was saying “I want to see a kitty.”
My daughter has been walking around the house going “I am so DONE!” because that is my default answer these days when everyone asks me how I’m feeling haha. This morning after she finished her breakfast I asked her how it was and she said “I am DONE with this mommy!”
Post # 6
I remember when my niece was around 4 she had climbed into bed to snuggle with me one morning. It was very nice and quiet, and then she quietly said “I’m sowwy Aunt Sawah, I’m sowwy.” I said “What is it Amber?” “I fawted Aunt Sawah. I’m sowwy Aunt Sawah I fawted.”
Post # 7
My niece is an interesting individual….if I can put it that way. She is 5.
My mother is single and so my husband and I will help around the house when need be. We were working on the yard when my lil niece ran up to me and started rambling, I did not understand what she was talking about, but I did pick up on this.
“I had a dream that the coffee table turned into an alligator and bit my head off, blood was going everywhere! and I was running around with no head!”
Post # 8
One night when I was hanging out with my two best friends and one of their young daughters, she said something that had us in stitches all night.
She was about 2 at the time and had a horrible cold, with a stuffy nose and strained voice. That on top of the already hard to understand language of a 2 year old, and we had comedic gold.
She kept walking about saying what we thought was “I want c*ck, I want c*ck”.
Her mother was mortified, and we had to record it and send it to the girls father to see if he could understand what she was trying to say.
We realized later that we had bought a cake as a treat, and she was trying to tell us she wanted some!
Post # 9
A few years ago I was babysitting my little cousin who was 4 or 5 at the time. She was playing Santa Claus and had her stuffed animals lined up, telling them what they were getting for Christmas. One animal had apparently been naughty because she exclaimed, “…and YOU are getting nothing but a douchebag of coal for Christmas!!”
I thought I would DIE laughing. I now tell Darling Husband every now and then that he will be getting a douchebag of coal for Christmas, it’s become a bit of a running joke. 😛
Post # 10
13 year old: This boy in my class kept asking me out and I kept telling him I didn’t know if I wanted to. Next day he kept bugging and bugging me for an answer. (sighs) Men are so demanding!
Me: (holding back laughter) Men? He’s a man?
13 year old: Yeah he’s a man. He’s got armpit hair so he’s a man!
Post # 11
While on the dance floor at our reception this weekend, DH’s son (he’s 6) asked if there was a baby in my belly yet. I told him no. He said “you have to make it first?”. I couldn’t even respond other than laugh. He’s obsessed with wanting a baby sister… He might not get that 🙂
Post # 12
My sister was rushing to get ready upstairs while her 4 year old was downstairs at the door with my mom and I.
My sister was complaining about something or another loudly from upstairs, and my nephew looks at my mom and goes
“Grandma, Mommy is sooooo dramatic. She does this when she wants attention.”
I’m pretty sure I laughed for like ten minutes straight.
Post # 13
@Mrs Sarah McK: This pretty much made my day!