(Closed) FURIOUS at what our friend said!!!!

posted 4 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
Member
2833 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Well good!… Do you even want someone like that at your wedding? Don’t give it a second thought. Just be happy that your other 2 friends were so excited 🙂

Post # 4
Member
334 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Have you ever had any suspicions that Sam might have feelings for you and is upset that you’re engaged?

Post # 5
Member
66 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I can understand a bit, but it seems like you are just overreacting.

If he can’t make it maybe A). He doesn’t feel close to you anymore so there’s not point in spending all this money to go to a place for a party. Or B). He’d like to go, but he knows that he can’t, and doesn’t want to get anyone’s hopes up. Also maybe he would rather you use it for someone else who can go. That might be why he didn’t take it and open it.

Also you might of offended him when you were joking about the Xbox.

Post # 8
Member
490 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

Honestly, if I were that guy in that situation, I would feel pressured whether or not you intended to put pressure on him. I think the way he handled it was wrong but really guys tend to not swoon over wedding details. I’m not saying I wouldn’t be hurt too but I do think you’re overreacting. Not trying to be harsh, just hoping that seeing it from another perspective might help you let go of some of the hurt/anger. I could see my brother doing something like that and I know he would never do it maliciously 🙂

Post # 9
Member
4528 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Huh. There must be something else going on with him. It’s really disappointing, I’m sure, but for whatever reason he’s just not interested in friendship anymore. 

Post # 10
Member
2057 posts
Buzzing bee

@AquaGrey8962:  Sam was extremely rude, but I think you’re overreacting. Would you honestly want him at your wedding?

My advice: Tell him how his actions/statements have hurt you both, and then let it go.  I say tell him because 1) he won’t know how hurt you are if you do not communicate it to him and 2) then you can move on and focus on celebrating with the guests who will encourage/uplift you at your wedding. It is not worth the added stress to keep it in and harbour resentment.

I am also confused what his ring price inquiry has to do with this incident.

Post # 12
Member
66 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@AquaGrey8962:  Maybe something just happened to him. That’s odd that he would just snap like that, but I am not him, I can’t tell you what he’s feeling. The possiblity of him liking you is sounds very plausable right about now. Maybe have a serious conversation with him about the way he is acting?

Engagments really do change people.

Hope you get this sorted.

Post # 13
Member
1020 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Hmm. Something strange going on there with Sam. Do you think it’s possible he has feelings for you?

ETA: Oops, just saw several PP got there first :p.

Post # 14
Member
1077 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

He might be upset you’re taking his best friend away from him.

 

It might be better that he doesn’t go. What happened to my friend is that the guy was confrontational TO THE BRIDE ON HER WEDDING DAY and told her that she pretty much knew nothing about his best friend and that he was really happy to meet her for the second time (sarcastically).

He got completely drunk and was extremely rude to the whole group of people at the wedding just because he was mad his friend was “leaving” him.

 

Obviously, he was asked to leave and my friend was pissed.

 

Just let your FI deal with him.

 

Post # 15
Member
3032 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Even though I don’t understand what Sam is acting like that and I’m very hurt for you that he seems to have done a 180 for no apparent reason, I do think the xbox comment was inappropriate. If I were him, I would have interpreted it as “our wedding should be your foremost priority and you should do without luxuries you actually want in order to attend.” If you want to be upset with him, I think you have the right, but don’t let his willingness/unwillingness to sacrifice be a factor. It’s really none of your business.

People constantly tell me what they think I can afford based on their observations, i.e. “oh, I know you can afford to a buy a stroller as a baby shower gift. Who are you kidding, I saw that new so-and-so you just bought.” Well, first of all: mind your manners and quit counting my pockets. Secondly, think about what you just said. If I just bought a new so-and-so, I obviously don’t HAVE that money anymore. And even if I did, who are you to suggest how I should be spending it. 

Post # 16
Member
710 posts
Busy bee

Please, don’t assume you know what his change in character is or is not about.

Had the invitations not been hand delivered, in front of your other friends, you wouldn’t have had to see his reaction, which it sounds like you had reason to think might not be enthusiastic.

Whoops. It’s ok. Let it go.

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