(Closed) Furious with father..

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1891 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I’m sorry to hear about this!  It sounds like he’s just one of those people who doesn’t know how to care about others.  My dad is the same way, and now I just try to have zero expectations of him.  Most of us would be so excited about getting married that we’d want to tell the world, but maybe your dad is just getting married because his new gf wants him to marry her, so he isn’t really excited about it.  Just focus on your own upcoming wedding and try not to let his behavior bother you!

Post # 4
Member
2462 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

ugh i’m sorry, that is an awful way to find out!

also, some people are just stupid when it comes to facebook and don’t understand it’s not the way to communicate important info!

Post # 6
Member
353 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I have a very similar relationship with my dad. He left my mum and my siblings behind about 10 years ago and married the new woman about 7 years ago. I didn’t find out at all beforehand but only a couple of weeks later, her family and her kids were invited to the ceremony but not us and to be honest, even though a lot of time has passed, that still hurts.

The way I found out my dad got married was talking to him over the phone and asking what’d they’d been up to recently, I was expecting him to say redecorating the house or something but instead he said oh well, we got married the other week. If I hadn’t asked I’m not sure when he would have told me.

The only advice I can give you is to let go, you have no control over what your dad choses to do and you can either worry and be upset or you can try and take a step back and not let it get to you. Your dad will live his life the way he wants to and there’s nothing you can do to change that, realizing that helped me let go and focus on myself rather than getting upset by my dad’s antics.

Post # 8
Member
5658 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

Well, you are not close and you dislike his FI, would you want to go to that wedding anyway? He sounds pretty unreasonable overall, so something like this isn’t surprising to me. : I think you should just ignore his immature behavior.

Post # 10
Member
353 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

It’s heartbreaking when you think about it, but when I get sad I think about all the other wonderful people I have in my life and at least my relationship with my dad makes me so much more grateful for the rest of my family and my SO. And I still have hope, maybe one day he’ll pull himself together! But until that happens I will not spend my energy on being upset about him…

Post # 11
Member
5658 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

@The Unsuspecting Bride: “I will not spend my energy on being upset about him.”

OP, I think this is the attitude you should have aswell. If he won’t even call you to tell you when he’s getting married, than he’s not worth a single tear.

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