Future Sister in Law Advice

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 2
Member
655 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - SPRING VALLEY COUNTRY CLUB

First, know that you are not responsilbe for her happiness. You’re only job is to please yourself and you future husband.

Now on to her. There is no law saying she has to be inculded in your wedding. and if she has some feelings about not being in the wedding. She sould have addressed them months ago. And she didn’t so…yeah. 

She can’t outshine you on your day. She is supposed to want to help you in everyway she can. Not treat this like’s a competion. You can’t please people like her!

I think it’s great that even with all that you are think of still trying to incorporate her into the wedding. She will either come around or she won’t.

 

Post # 3
Member
2649 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

JessicaM05551:  By all means call her and apologize for hurting her feelings and offer for her to walk down the aisle, tell her about the corsage, etc.

I don’t see what the issue is regarding her communicating with her brother instead of you.  He’s her brother and the groom.  Don’t take it as a slight.

Also remember that she isn’t obligated to offer help.  

Post # 4
Member
42472 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think you are going above and beyond with your plan to apologize and ask her walk with her parents, but there’s no harm in that.

She is likely used to whining and pouting and getting her own way becuse her family likely caves to this kind of pressure.

You have done nothing wrong. She is behaving like a petulant child.

Post # 8
Member
655 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - SPRING VALLEY COUNTRY CLUB

JessicaM05551:  I am going through a similar thing. and i really had to remove my self from it emotionally. I used cry and get so upset over it. But realize my future sister in law feelings of distain and unhappiness should be clouding how i feel about my day. Everything is going to be fine. and she will get over it.

Post # 9
Member
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

Ugh, she sounds awful. If she can’t act like an adult and support you, why should she expect any special treament? 

I really wouldn’t worry about her. If she brings it up to your FI again, maybe he can gently suggest that she be supportive and helpful rather than demanding and unresponsive?

Post # 13
Member
423 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2016 - Our Castle

If she doesnt want to help then to bad.. My sister will be helping organise caterers etc on the day according to my instructions.. she is a bit OCD so everything will be in order or heads will roll..hehe

Tell her to help or get over it.. I say be a little bridezilla when needed to pull people out of their selfish minds.. Do the whole my wedding wont be as good as yours but can she help you.. she might think she is better because you need her to help?.. there for in her mind she is better and happy to do it?.. Play it up for your benifit if you have to.. accept her for the way she is and learn how to use it is a possitive manner?

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