(Closed) Future sister-in-laws.. Do I need to ask them to be in the bridal party?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
2702 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Nope, you do not need to include them. Are you close? Are you having any readings at the wedding? If you want to include them maybe you can have them read.

My DH’s brothers wife wasn’t in my bridal party. We get along great but we’re not close. I’m sure there will be no hard feelings especially if you’re having such a small affair. They will understand!

Post # 4
276 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@peachlavendergold:  I would base your decision on 2 factors. The size of your wedding, and the age of your future sisters. For one, they will understand if your having a small wedding why  it might be unfitting to have an extra large bridal party. Second, asking is also asking a task of them which might be a burden id they are older and have busy lives. If you were to keep it small, they might appreciate that you didnt ask just as much. they’ll get it

Post # 6
2589 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Unless you’re really close to them, no, but I’d try to involve them in some way, like a reading – as PP suggested.  My FI’s sister is a mom, and her daughter is going to be the flower girl – but since she’s only going to be 18 months old, sis is going to walk with her down the aisle and be listed as a guest of honor.

Post # 7
1734 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@peachlavendergold:  I think as a med resident and with little ones, they’ll be thankful to not have to do the bridesmaid gig. If there’s a reading they could do, that would be nice — in the meantime, if there’s a chance to do some bonding stuff with you, that would probably be cool. Go out to lunch, or email them with something you found that reminds you of them, etc. Ask if they’d like to come along for doing nails and hair on the day, if that’s something you’re planning. But no, I woulnd’t sweat it, as long as they aren’t the weird resentful type.

Post # 8
4485 posts
Honey bee

Don’t ask anyone out of obligation. Only ask them if you absolutely want them to stand up for you and you have a great relationship with them.

Post # 9
1512 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I say nope. My SO has a sister, but we’re not close at all. I’ve actually only spoken with her a couple of times, and it was awkward. I’m not asking her because, frankly, other than her being his sister, she’s a stranger to me. It would just feel weird for her to be up there, especially since he’s not close to her at all. IF we involve her in the wedding, she’ll most likely play the piano when I walk down the aisle. That’s a big IF too. She may not have any part to play, which I think would be perfectly fine her. If you feel that your bridal party is already large enough, or you’re not that close, don’t ask them. Maybe you could just work on getting closer once you’re married and it doesn’t feel obligatory

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