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Gave up my career and now hating my life

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
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    1.
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    Busy bee
    PandasWifey    September 26, 2009   Denver, Colorado

    Hey Bees, I figure you all are usually such a big help with everything else, maybe there would be something you could say to make me feel better about this. Or maybe a miracle will happen and someone from Northeast PA will actually be able to help me find a job.

    Long story short, I lost my professional managing editor job in NY one week before getting engaged. It was bittersweet. We moved to PA for the cheaper cost of living because my job was the only thing keeping us in NY. Little did I know, there wouldn't be any magazines or job opportunities within 60 miles of this hole in the ground. The nearest trade magazines were in NJ and their offices are smaller than my living room. I know because I went in to each one personally to hand out resumes before finally giving up and looking for a restaurant job.

    Four months of grueling searching and tons of rejection later I finally found a stupid waitressing job. The one manager knows how successful I once was, and I think he resents me for it. He is completely abusing me for making simple mistakes that people who have been there for years make all the time.

    I worked there for a month and made $262 TOTAL getting paid $7.15 an hour to train (only a few hours at time), and then having to start at just two tables. I finally had a real section last night and he cut me down to two tables again for spite. I can't make money this way, I can't live. I thought I'd do anything to just work again, but now I think I was better off unemployed ... at least then I made $400 a week.

    I need help. I miss my career. I'd do anything to be in an office again working 9-5 for even just $12 an hour or more.

     
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    Blushing bee
    Miss Cherry    August 22, 2009   Southern NJ

    Are you only willing to stay in that field?  Maybe this a sign that you need to start branching out!  You need to find something that you can work from home, atleast part of the time!  Can you start doing freelance type work while working a part time job?

    And my suggestion is to call a temp agency!!  With your qualifications that might be a better option than a restaurant job!  And it might help you find something closer to your field.

     
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    Busy bee
    PandasWifey    September 26, 2009   Denver, Colorado

    Thanks Cherry, I am willing to branch out and do something different. I've applied for several administrative and entry level jobs and haven't found anything like that teither. I contacted a local temp agency and they didnt have anything for me. This town is just so small. I feel so hopeless and stuck.

     
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    Busy bee
    Habibi      

    Is it financially possible for you to stop waitressing? If so I would suggest that. If you stay there you will only feel more demoralized. And eventually it's going to effect your self esteem and your ability to work up the energy to find a new job.

    Have you thought about going back to school? Or perhaps freelance editing since you have publishing experience? What about starting your own business? Is your town lacking something that you think you could provide? You could also be a consultant with your managing ed experience. Google around "how to..." and see if things come up. Companies aren't hiring full time employees right now but they might be willing to pay you on an hourly basis to get extra work done from home. I would reach out to you contacts in NY too.

    If you want to brain storm with some one feel free to PM me. I am in the middle of working out my own career issues so I'm happy to chat. Good luck!

     
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    Buzzing bee
    vintage2010    April 10, 2010  

    Hey there!  When I worked in human resources for a major company we would hire temp employees to fill open spots.  This way we could have them work for a few months and if they did a good job and got along with everyone else then we would hire them.  In fact everyone in my HR dept. was hired that way but me.  And I was hired in a different dept and transferred in.

    I would try that.  I think that's how a lot of people get into admin postions. 

    I know how you feel about not working in your choosen field.  I went to graduate school for HR.  I worked for 5 years doing what I loved.  Training and Development.  But what got me was my hour to hour-half one-way drive to work everyday, the gas $$, the toll $$ and the miles on my new car.  So I quit and started working with my brother at the family biz.  I don't do what I was made to do but it pays the bills, I make my own hours, I get to see my brother and Dad everyday and I'm 10 mintues from home!  This change has allowed me to enjoy the finer things in life like going to the gym, grabbing lunch with friends and family, getting a good nights sleep, etc, etc.

    Good luck... something will come along!

     
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    Helper bee
    sminerva21    September 26, 2009   Chicago, IL/wedding in Upstate, NY

    Have been unemployed, I totally feel your pain. It's awful, and it makes you feel lost and quite frankly, useless (or, at least, that's how I felt).

    Can I ask if you were let go or if you quit? If you were let go I would highly recommend that you quit waitressing and collect unemployment (if you're still able to). It's not a lot, but actually, I think it's more than you're making waiting tables, and then you'd have all day to really think about what you want to do and get more resumes out there.

    Can I also suggest that if you can't collect unemployment, that you quit waitressing and start maybe running personal errands for people by putting up ads on CraigsList? I had a few friends that did this while they were unemployed, and they actually really liked it. It gave them enough free time to attend to their own job search, and in the meantime, they watered plants, picked up dry cleaning, walked dogs, got the mail, did some grocery shopping, etc., and they made decent money without putting too much time into it. I was unemployed for four months last winter, and right before I got my new job, I concered doing this because I was just bored.

    Not sure if that's any help, but just be creative with how you can make some extra bucks while still giving yourself ample time to regain your career. And just remember, it's also the economy right now. I know people are sick of hearing that, but it's true. It's hard anyone, including former VPs and executives, to find work eight now. So hang in there, it might take a while, but things WILL get better.

     
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    Bumble bee
    rachel_leigh    May 15, 2010  

    Try checking out elance.com. Companies and people post writing and editing jobs there and you bid for the work on a contract basis. I did contract writing when I was out of work and it helped me get through until I found a job.

     
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    Sugar bee
    KellyV    September 12, 2009   New York, NY

    Well, here is one thing.  You said you lost your dream job.  So you didnt LEAVE it.  It wasnt voluntary, so try not to kick yourself over it, you know?  There are thousands in your situation right now.  Hang in there, it will get better.  In the interim, you need to search for a new job STAT.  You being constantly demoralized and talked down to wont do anything but harm to your mindset, and that will be unhealthy.  Check EVERYWHERE for opportunities - craigslist (wanted and post your own), elance.com (like rachel said above),  Check some government sites, I have friends who do eidting and stuff from home for the gov't and private agencies.  Good luck, keep your chin up!

     
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    Blushing bee
    nada122    January 2009   Florida

    Hey there! Sorry to hear about your job struggles -- I'm a journalism major as well, and I can tell you It's definitely HARD to get a job in this field these days. Thankfully I have a job, but not doing exactly what I want...I've even thought about branching out to other fields.

    Lucky for us, even though the specific writing/editing field maybe suffering, you have experience that is beneficial. Try looking for Advertising or PR jobs. Try with your time off to expand your journalism skills to online. Start writing a blog about something... Also, look into freelancing. I know there are jobs at examiner.com where you work from home and get paid based on web views.

    Anyway, working a job you hate is not good for you. I would even work in retail until you find the job you want or freelance while you work. There are options and hopefully you find something!

     
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    Helper bee
    mlkeysock    September 1, 2007   near Philadelphia, PA

    Are you willing to commute a bit? East Stroudsburg is only about 35 minutes from the Lehigh Valley (straight down 33) where there should be more jobs. It might not be the high paying career you had in NYC, but it could be something!

     
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    Sugar bee
    Jenniphyr    February 2, 2013   Alberta, Canada

    Have you looked at job opportunities in surrounding cities? I know you said that you haven't been able to find any magazine companies within 100 kilometres, but what about admin jobs, or HR positions, etc? Have you also looked at applying to be a work-from-home editor, or work for the local paper? 

    *HUGS* The right job is out there. And you'll find it. I know it sucks being out of a job, and sometimes its worse if you DO have one and it sucks, but you'll pull through.

     
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    Bee Keeper
    eloping    May 23, 2010  

    that sounds so heartbreaking for you.... :(

    is there a gap in the market where you live in that you can see & utilize your skills????

    sending positive vibes that something good will come your way soon

     
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    Busy bee
    PandasWifey    September 26, 2009   Denver, Colorado

    Thanks everyone for your support ... Yes I am willing to commute, but no, I can't find any jobs in surrounding cities. Also, after just spending 4 months doing nothing but look for jobs, I'm really reluctant to start the search all over again :(

     
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    Busy bee
    Irishker03    June 12, 2010   Boston (home), Geneva, NY (wedding)

    EngagedToPanda: hugs to you! It's not easy to lose your dream job, so don't kick yourself! You are fabulous and don't let 4 months of job searching make you think that you aren't!  <span style="font-family: tahoma; font-size: 13px;">Getting a new job or finding a new career isn't easy. Have you checked out craigslist, monster and all those other job sites? They might have something small to tide you over while you continue to keep looking. What about local hospitals or colleges/universities? They are usually hiring regardless of the current economic situation. 

     
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    Sugar bee
    GaBGal    September 25, 2010  

    look up at admin/secretary jobs and apply to any and all. what type of magazine were you at? I would suggest writing a blog relevant to the type of writing you've done and would like to continue to do. Also, send interest letters to any relevant company even if they aren't hiring this way they can keep you in mind. Where in NEPA are you?

     
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    Sugar bee
    Ms Mini    July 17, 2010   Medicine Hat, AB

    I can definitely co-miserate a bit ... my fiance got a job in a different city back in January, he LOVES this job and as a nurse, I should be really portable to a new city ... so we bought a house, I got a casual job (all that was available) and I moved ... I gave up a perminent full time job, and after next week, I am done orientation and have NO SHIFTS booked, so I have no idea if and when I will be working in the next month, and we have this new house, and are trying to scrape up 10K for our wedding next summer, deposits are coming due for photography and such, and I no idea about my next paycheque, I have had a few cry's over it this week

     
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    Busy bee
    PandasWifey    September 26, 2009   Denver, Colorado

    Ms miny, at least I'm not alone. Sigh. Is your job in a restaurant too? I've only been getting about 2 shifts a week when i applied for full time.

     
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    Beekeeper
    crebre80    November 20, 2010   Baton Rouge, LA

    @engagedtopanda and msminy ((HUGS)) i got sick earlier this year and took off work. i am not engaged but i started my own event design business so if anyone has started their own businesses they definitely know that the first year is always the slowest. things are picking up for me, but it definitely puts a strain on my self esteem that i am not making as much as i once was and am definitely dependent upon my boyfriend.

     

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