(Closed) Get my dream dress ot settle for something less expensive?

posted 8 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
Member
7175 posts
Busy Beekeeper

If you don’t already have the money for it, I’d say it’s not worth spending the extra money (and trying to come up with it with a part time job or out of your 401K).  Keep looking for a dress you love – but first, come up with a reasonable budget for it – and then don’t try on dresses that are more expensive!  I made that mistake (well, of not telling the consultant what my range is) and I tried on a dress that was 4K more than I wanted to spend.  Of course I fell in love with it – but I wasn’t willing to spend that much on a dress – so I let it go.  But – I do think about it from time to time (especially because there’s parts of my current dress I don’t love and I know my FI would have LOVED me in that $$ dress).

I don’t know how you are paying for the rest of your wedding – but, I’ll almost guarantee you that there will be hidden costs that creep up.  Just something to keep in mind….

Post # 4
Member
1805 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

Have you considered the possibility of having it made by a local dressmaker?  Sometimes it’s not that great of a savings but I am thinking with a $7000 dress you are paying for the NAME mostly… unless it’s covered in gold dust or something… seems reasonable to me that a talented seamstress could make something 99% like it for a lot less. You should check it out.

What is it you like best about the dress?  Another option might be to find something similar and then have some alterations done to make it more like the one you love.  Would you mind sharing a pic or link or something for the dress?

Post # 5
Member
2250 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

I have to say I agree, I wouldn’t take out of your 401k! Since you have a dress, and you also have until may, maybe try some agressive saving and if you can come up with enough, then get it, if not, maybe try to have a simmilar dress made, or look for a knock off. Do you have pictures? I have also heard of like pre selling your dress before you wear it, but I forget the website. I bet the hive knows though.

Post # 6
Member
185 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I have been feeling a little half hearted about my dress but you know, it’s fine. Someone said on another thread the other day that once you get in it and the day starts happening you forget all about which dress you are wearing. The fact is you can’t afford it and it really makes no sense to pay $1000 an hour to wear a dress that will never be worn by you again. Especially since your FI thinks it is a waste. I wouldn’t want that over my head to start the marriage. I would look again at the dress you already bought and maybe go shopping some more but I couldn’t justify the dream dress if I were in your position, sorry 🙁

Post # 7
Member
1510 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Coming from someone who wore a heavily beaded Kenneth Pool, I don’t think its worth it.  That $7000 most likely doesn’t include tax, which will be hefty considering the price or alterations. 

If you are going to splurge on something, splurge on the photography. 

I think if you can afford to buy the dress meaning you can pay cash today for it, then go for it, but if you have to get another job and take money out of your 401K, I think its a bad idea.  There are beautiful dresses that will look just as beautiful on you for far cheaper.

Post # 8
Member
2634 posts
Sugar bee

Do NOT take money out of your 401k for a wedding dress!  Honestly, I think you should find something within your price range. 

Sorry, I know it’s not what you want to hear, but really, it’s JUST a dress (yes an important dress, we’ll all agree on that).

Post # 9
Member
1779 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I also would not buy it, especially if my FH thought it was wasteful.  If it was $700, I would tell you to go for it, but $7,000 is 3-5% down on a house. I think in the end you will feel beautiful and amazing no matter what you wear! 

I second the idea of the seamstress!

Post # 10
Member
2634 posts
Sugar bee

I also want to throw this out there.  You’d have to add the $500 that you already spent on the OTHER dress, so really it’d be a $7500 dress.  AND you’ll probably be needing alterations, which depending on the dress could be a LOT more. 

My vote is still NO.

Post # 11
Member
659 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

what is the brand?

a 7k must be a big time designer. If it is a monique, vera, oscar, etc… then that dress will probably just depreciate by 1,000 after wearing it. you can always sell it.

but if you don’t have the money now, then i would go with something a lot cheaper. you don’t want to go broke.

as someone mentioned earlier, i would spend that 7k on a photographer!

Post # 12
Member
190 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010 - The Pearl S. Buck House

I fell in love with a 6K Melissa Sweet gown. I toooortured myself for months when I decided not to buy it. I was shopping too early anyway. I found an fairly similar gown – Anne Barge 7K gown- as a sample and bought it for around 2K. Months later, I wasn’t happy with it. Then I walked into David’s Bridal of all places and found THE ONE for $750.00, and I know longer ever think about the Melissa Sweet gown I loved, and I’m trying to sell the Anne Barge. 

There’s my story for what it’s worth! But I’m dying: can you link to a pic of this dream dress of yours?

Post # 15
Member
105 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I mean, if you’re willing to take the hit on the $500 dress, I agree that the dressmaker approach is a good way to go.

Post # 16
Member
5148 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

If it were a couple hundred dollars different, I’d say “go for it”. But $6500 different, no way!

Here’s how I would picture it:
Dress 1 with $6500 cash sitting on top of it
or
Dress 2

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