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i feel you on getting super upset over things that you know aren't worthy of such an intense reaction! last night, FI was sitting on the edge of the bed studying (i don't like when people sit on the edge of the bed, it's bad for it), he was sitting at the bottom so he was blocking the tv, and he had all the lights on when i just wanted to doze in bed and watch House while i got sleepy. i was so mad, i don't know why i couldn't just nicely ask him to study elsewhere, i just laid there pissed off, silently thinking mean things.
i think it's usually just people are overwhelmed with things and then it becomes easier to snap over little things that really don't matter, rather than big things that you can't change.
That sounds like something my FI would do too, moderndaisy. He's done similar things without asking me first that pissed me off. I guess this is when it's important to remember why you love him.
I get irrationally upset over lots of small stuff when I'm stressed or tired (which seems to happen a lot these days).
Just the other day, he walked me home from work and wanted to go the way he normally goes (which I tried once and didn't like that way cuz it didn't seem as fast to me) so I told him I wanted to go my way cuz it's shorter. We got into a stupid argument about who had the better way.
My husband expects me to get upset over the small stuff, but usually I don't. The other day he dropped one of my beloved egg plates and freaked out that I was going to be mad at him. I told him that if didn't do it on accident, I'd be mad, but he obviously didn't do it on purpose!
Uhm yes. I once got REALLY angry at DH when he made me a caesar salad with sausage in it. Who puts sausage in a caesar?! That's just gross!!! I seriously nearly burst out into tears. I guess I was just really excited about regular caesar salad and he ruined it?! And yes, I put the sausage on the side. And yes, I was having mega PMS at the time ;)
I am definitely one to get irrationally upset over little things. It is something I am working on! For me, it is the freaking toilet seat and him leaving his used tissues around. I will remind him about the toilet seat, nicely, while he is peeing and then when he is done he STILL wont close it! And same thing with the tissues. I will remind him nicely. Like if we are on the couch watching TV and then he puts the used scrunched up tissues on the ottoman Ill tell him not to forget to throw them away. And then the next morning they will be there and Ill want to scream!!! Even though I know, I could put the toilet seat down or throw away the tissues myself. But the point is he doesnt listen!!
Wow, that also felt good!
Oh ya...I've done this. When DH takes the garbage out and doesn't replace the trash bag I react like he has punched me in the face. It's totally insane and unwarranted. However, I usually recognize the insanity within about 10 minutes of the freak out and apologize right away.
@mwitter80: that one drives me up the wall! I always say, if you take it out you have to put a new bag in! But he never ever gets it. Lol
I get so irrationally mad when plans change. I LIKE having plans and knowing what we're going to do and planning accordingly, and FI thinks nothing of just switching things up at the last second and I cannot DEALLLLLL. He's on a business trip all week this week so this weekend we were going to stay home and then head to Georgia in 2 weeks to visit family and get some wedding stuff done. Then last night he comes home and tells me he'd rather go THIS weekend, which just threw me off and I had to rearrange appointments I'd made for 2 weeks from now. It made me grumpy.
@ohheavenlyday: Oooh agreed. I'm a planner, not so good at the spontaneous.
I am a huge planner and my man is, well not at all! plus, I am a neat freak and he basically could live in filth and not be bothered so as you could guess this could cause problems! However, he is so calm that it has helped me a lot! Instead of freaking out I calmly tell him he better get his stuff together lol! Plus I recently read a book that helped me not freak out! It was amazing and a life saver! PM me if you want the info!
I get mad over a lot every single thing of what you ladies have listed. As well, I know sometimes he is trying to be super sweet by doing something that just ticks me off instead.
And to boot.... FI got deployed with the Army and now I feel so guilty. I think back to all those times wasted fighting over something stupid when we could have been happy and relishing our time together.
@ohheavenlyday: Oh, totally!! I have actually been working on this one since college. I've tried to be a lot more flexible, with a fair amount of success. But then every once in awhile something will trip my wire and I'll get a wave of rage, lol. At least I don't take it out on anyone - I keep it to myself.
For instance, for Mother's Day, Fi and I took my mom and stepdad to a nice restaurant. One of the reasons we picked it is that they had a vegetarian entree that sounded really good to me. (You'd be surprised how few higher-end restaurants in Boston do well at vegetarian options). Well, of course the first thing the waiter says is, "There's one change to the menu - the ravioli are no longer available." AAARRGGG. I almost started crying. It was a little nuts. They ended up making me a different meal, and it was fine. But at first I was just picturing getting served a plate of grilled vegetables and charged $18 for it (this has happened to me once) and I got SO pissed off!
Yesterday I got mad at my significant other because we were supposed to go to dinner (Monday is "date night" for us) and when he got home, instead of coming inside and changing right away, he was outside admiring his handy yardwork from this weekend and smelling the flowers (really...you're a freaking grown man smelling the flowers and your gf is STARVING!!). I clearly get cranky when I'm hungry and was definitely at fault for being mad, but it just annoyed me...
Whew...that DID feel better to get off my chest! :)
I've had that happen; I'll go to a restaurant and find that what I really want is not being offered that day and I start getting pissy like FINE I DON'T EVEN WANT TO EAT. Then I just suck it up and order something else, LOL.
Basically I am super unflexible and not very easy going.
I remember once when we were dating, I totally lost it on the stupidest thing. Normally, I'm pretty even keel, but our first Halloween we were carving our pumpkins. For some reason, I didnt want to cut the top off. I wanted him to do it. I kept being sweet and insisting that he do it. He was elbow deep in paumpkin guts and kept saying I should do it myself. Nothing nasty, just a confused boy wondering why his fully capable girlfriend couldn't cut a circle in pumpkin. After several minutes, I lost it, started seeing red and the weird evil voice came from somewhere and I spat back, "would you just MAN-UP and do it?!!!!!"
I have no idea where that came from. He was shocked and hurt that I would say something, especially since my tone was so awful.
Luckily, after a few minutes when i had a chance to calm down, we were able to laugh about it.
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Beekeeper
This morning I was LIVID with my DH because he packed the coat I wanted to wear to work today (we are moving this week). I went through the closet in front of him this weekend and told him specifically not to pack any of the coats that were hanging (I only left out 2 for myself) but since he's a boy and doesn't listen, he packed one of my coats only leaving me one to wear all week. I have no idea where the coats are in our huge pile of bags and boxes, only he does. And he had to leave early for a client meeting.
Of course, he's trying to be sweet by doing all of the packing (I have done none) and he goes out of his way to get things for me when I need them, like last night I needed our pasta stirrer and he dove right into a box and retreived it, no problem. So I really shouldn't be mad, but I am.
Whew, that feels better already. What do you get irrationally angry over?