Getting Married in Non-Catholic Churches?

posted 3 years ago in Christian
Post # 3
Member
576 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

Could your fiancé not be baptized again in the Church? That seems like a simple enough solution.

Post # 4
Member
4163 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

Most churches have member/non-member costs for weddings. Mine, for example, charges $600 for members (coordinator, janitorial services, etc.) vs $2,000 for a non-member.

I’m not Catholic, so I may be way off base here, but wouldn’t you have “issues” with the church “recognizing” your wedding if it’s not in a Catholic church?? Might be advisable like MoonlitMagnolia suggested, for your FI to have another baptism.

Post # 5
Member
236 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Can your priest not grant you a dispensation? My FI is not baptised in any religion, and is not converting, but because I am a practising Catholic and we have agreed to raise our children as Catholic, our priest has agreed to marry us in the church anyway. If you sit down with your priest and talk to him about it, is there any way he would agree? 

Post # 6
Member
10495 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2011

The United Church of Canada is the second largest in Canada, after Catholic.  They tend to be fairly liberal about who they will marry, although it depends on the specific church.  I don’t know if you would get what you’re looking for from the ceremony.

@rebwana:  It becomes a tax issue in Canada.  Many will not do this, as it could cause them to lose their charity status if they don’t treat everyone equally.

Post # 7
Member
845 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

@JessicaJupiter:  My situation is a bit different but I can hopefully give you some insight. I am Catholic in the sense that I’ve done the sacraments up until confirmation, and FI is Presbyterian. Neither of us attend church, like ever .. he sometimes goes on xmas eve with his family but that’s it. However his family has officially been part of a Pres church for his whole life and it’s always been the same husband and wife minister team. I contacted a Catholic church in the city we want to marry in, and they said we had to be registered regularly attending members for at least a year. I was like, well there’s no way I’m gonna regularly attend a church 2 hours away from me, or anywhere for that matter since I’m just not interested. I called his ministers and they were very welcoming. However, FI is a member of that church so I’m not sure how it would work for you, but I recommend checking with a Presbyterian church.

Post # 8
Member
828 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Your fiance needs to speak to someone at the diocese office where he was baptized. Do not just take the word of a parish secretary that he is out of luck. You need to talk to someone higher up.

If the records are truly destroyed, there should be recourse for him by way of getting affadavits from people who were present at the baptism.  Are his parents/godparents alive? Or any other relatives who attended the baptism?

Post # 10
Member
511 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

The United Church is very open and welcoming in terms of who they will marry. I know for my home church, they already had two weddings of non-church members for the day I am getting married! The way they do it is if a church member wants to get married on the same day as you, you might have to compromise on the time of your ceremony, but they won’t just give you the boot or anything. I’d definitely give them a shot!

Post # 11
Member
304 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

My husband and I got married in an Episcopal/Anglican church. They tend to be relatively lax, so I don’t think you would run into any issues. However, a lot of them do have member vs. non member fees. The church we married in was no charge for members and $600 for non-members. 

Post # 12
Member
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I went to a Lutheran Church as a kid, and I remember hearing that they had weddings for lots of people who weren’t Lutheran. We are getting married in a United Church, which my fiance belongs to but not me and they welcomed us with open arms. I personally wouldn’t want to get married in a church if they had such a stick up their butt. Honestly, all Christian churches should welcome all Christians. Regardless how much you attend, or what denomination you are.

Post # 13
Member
258 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@JessicaJupiter:  Biblically speaking, the ‘church’ is not a building. As Christians, we are supposed to BE the church, not just GO to church. The Church is a group of Bible believing Christians, not four walls with a steeple. 

My husband and I are very faithful Christians, and we were married by our Pastor at our reception site. God was every bit as present in our ceremony as if we had been married in our church, your church, or the middle of Walmart. 

If you can’t be married in a specific building, don’t sweat it. That’s not the point anyway. 

Post # 14
Member
9533 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m Lutheran and we rent our church out to just about anybody. We’d probably balk at proclaimed devil worshipers, but within reason we’re pretty relaxed. The pastor is separate from the church and each pastor gets to pick who they are comfortable marrying, but many are fine with non-members.

Post # 15
Member
3249 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@JessicaJupiter:  talk to the diocese.  That is not a valid reason to refuse to marry you.  You can marry a non catholic in the church, so this should not pose that much of an issue.   You may not be allowed a mass, but theree should be no problem with a liturgy.  Seriously; this is not how the rules work, and you should get the Bishop involved.  Both partners do not have to be Catholic; I’m not spouting opinions, these are rules set forth by the Vatican.

Post # 16
Member
2895 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

HEre is my question, and this is just for the sake of understanding;  Why do you want to be married in a church of a religion that you don’t particpate in?  Is it just because it is a church? 

Is there a reason you are against a space outside of a church building?  You can get married almost anywhere (park, public building, ect) as long as you get the proper allotment to do so. 

The man reason I ask is because I would find it odd/hard to get married in a church where I don’t believe/accept the teachings of.  Any money you would give them would go to that church and their teachings. 

Also, is it just the baptism that is a problem?  I know my local Catholic church will not marry anyone who has not been a member for at least 6 months.  We live in a fairly large city, and I think they just don’t want to be a place where people get married. 

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