(Closed) getting married Saturday and FSIL is freaking out — HELP!

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
532 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

slip some xanax in her cocktail perhaps? hehe jk idk I have no suggestions, good luck with all that she sounds like a piece of work. 

Post # 4
Member
3697 posts
Sugar bee

Just keep reminding yourself, “she is her own problem.” Which is easier said than done, because, ultimately, yes, she is all of your problem, too – but she has to be responsible for her own choices, you can’t control what she does, only your own reaction to it.

So, if she freaks out, gets “sick,” whatever,  just say “Oh, that’s too bad. We’ll miss you” – and let her go. Try not to feed her any attention.

Post # 5
Member
16 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2013

Is there any way you can have a heart to heart with her before the wedding?  You know her better than me (obviously) but maybe you can tell her that you didn’t include her as a BM and you know you have issues, but that you are going to be family now and you are excited she will be with FI’s brother to celebrate?  I would prob try to make some sort of friendly gesture and hope that it rubbed off on her.

Post # 6
Member
4194 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

You are going to be so busy on your wedding day that I seriously doubt you’ll notice her.

It sounds like the family gets what a brat she is- the fact that FMIL isn’t getting ready with you because of this girl’s drama speaks volumes. I don’t know if it’s worth it for FI to speak to his brother- “This is a really important day for us- I really hope you’ll make us a priority.”

Post # 9
Member
817 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013 - Mansion House at the MD Zoo

The only person whose day she has the ability to ruin is her own. If people choose to play into her drama, leave with her, whatever, they are making that choice for themselves and that’s on them. It sucks that she has the power to get people to do this stuff, but everyone is an adult and has the ability to give in or stand up to her, their choice. You are doing the right thing by not playing into her drama, and it’s not upsetting his family, so no harm no foul. Don’t let her get to you.

Post # 11
Member
3302 posts
Sugar bee

Hope it all ends well – have a happy wedding day!

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