(Closed) GF Wedding but she wants cash for a gift, how much should i give??

posted 9 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
Member
229 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Really, she put that in her invitation?  I think some people are shocked to see registry information included with an invitation (although I don’t necessarily mind–many people register now, and it’s nice to just be told up front where to go).  But asking for cash seems a little gauche.  

But either way, that’s the situation… I would say just give her the same in cash that you would have spent on a gift.  If $40 is about how much you would have spent, then that seems appropriate.

Post # 4
Member
2470 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Wow — I’m surprise she put that in her invite!

Give her what you can afford. $40 seems reasonable.

Post # 5
Member
120 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2018 - St. Charles Borromeo Church/Jefferson-Orleans North

Whoa…talk about tacky! You never mention gifts in an invite! However, it is what it is…I think $40 would be fine.

Post # 6
Member
563 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Wow –  I wonder if any of the guests will buy her a book on ettiquette instead of giving her cash!

In response to your question, I think that $40 would be fine. 

 

Post # 7
Member
613 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

Are you and your FI going to the wedding?  If yes, I think $40 may be a little low.  If you’re not going, or just you are going, I think $40 is fine, but $50 would probably cover the cost of your plate, which is typically my litmus.

Post # 8
Member
265 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I don’t think it’s tacky, she’s just being honest. Should she let people show up with 15 espresso makers just to satisfy Emily Post?

 Give whatever you’re comfortable giving, whether it’s $10 or $50. I agree with others who said that whatever you would have spent on a gift is fine.

Post # 9
Member
96 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2009

I think asking for cash is the same as having a wedding registry (it is also asking for certain things). They are just being honest with what they want. Maybe they already have their house and they already have all the things they need in a home, so an additional toaster or plates are not necessary.

 $40 is ok, in my opinion.  

Post # 10
Member
1238 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I’ve been to a few weddings with no registry and where the couple wanted $ towards the honeymoon.  I think this is especially common for people that already have all the stuff they need in their home, or for those that just cannot afford a honeymoon.  My litmus is how much I would have spent on a gift.  If it is someone close to me I ususally buy a place setting of their China (usually about $100), if it is someone that is just an aquaintence then I spend about 1/2 that, so $50 would work for me.  This is a personal decision that you need to make.  If both you and your fh are going, then you give a little more than if you were going alone.

Post # 11
Member
23 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Do you know what kind of reception they are having? I would give enough to cover your costs — usually $50. 

 

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