Gift from husband, would you be put off too?

posted 3 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
8818 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper


I can totally see why this upset you.  Just rememember that sometimes husbands just don’t think. This is why women are smarter 🙂

Post # 4
1838 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

well it sounds… a gift from a i’m sure he was just trying to be helpful, but it’s obvious to us as women that it’s a bad gift idea.  maybe just explain to him (if you haven’t already) that you’re feeling uncomfortable about gaining weight


Post # 5
394 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

he probably read somewhere that women should use it and got it for you! Def use it though! I Wish I had used more!!! 

Post # 6
2876 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 1998

@KH:  nope your not overreacting IMO I would have felt exactly the same. Totally inappropriate gift:( I also found it hard excepting my changing body so you are not alone their. 

Post # 7
1103 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I doubt he was trying to make you feel bad!  When my sister was pregnant I was so excited I bought her a similar gift, because I was just so excited to see her belly grow!!  I never considered how it might make her feel upset, so now I feel slightly silly, hehe.  I think he’s just excited 😉

Post # 8
1634 posts
Bumble bee

I’m not expecting, but I am a SUPER sensitive person so i can somewhat relate. I imagine he was coming from a good place but never really thought that it could be taken the wrong way AND you’re probably a little more sensitive than usual. I’d be put off but does he feel like t was maybe a poor choice in a gift or does he think that you should be super pumped? do you have new stretch marks that you maybe mentioned in passing? Or did you maybe mention that you were not looking forward to getting them?

Post # 9
8678 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

I wouldn’t be too upset. He might be trying to make you feel more comfortable in your own body if he knows you’re upset about weight gain. Everyone toutes how stretch mark cream & cocoa butter make the skin softer and more supple so you don’t stretch as easily.

I’d spin it in a positive light — He’s trying to make you more secure in your changing body. There really isn’t anything he can do outside of that and compliments (Which, come on. 99% of women never believe anyway.)

Post # 10
7196 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

I think his heart was probably in the right place, but yeah, that’s not the best “gift”.

Post # 11
2243 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

I wouldn’t be upset. My stretchmark cream cost 40$; It would make an awesome gift. You’re going to gain at least 15-20lbs. With your tiny frame, stretchmarks are a serious possibility. I think its time to start accepting weight gain & embracing the growth we’re about to have!

Post # 12
7055 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Men! I would hate that too. That is such an inappropriate gift. He meant well, but I think it was just a “man moment”. Talk to him about it and move on. Sigh.

Post # 14
2884 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@KH:  im around 14 weeks and i’ve been strugglign a bit with the weight gain and changes. i am excited about the pregnancy…but it’s like i dont recognise my body anymore! weight gain and all the symptoms, i feel a bit overwhelmed. and i tend to bring up the weight gain A LOT in conversation, i cant help it.

so honestly, id probably  be the same haha. my DH is being sweet though, and just repeats over and over that he thinks im beautiful and he thinks its awesome that my body is changing. It helps me when i have to put yet another pair of pants/a top away as it doesnt fit anymore

Post # 15
4139 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

awwwww no I would have totally been upset. He meant well I’m sure, because it sure seems “practical” but the reminder of the less pleasant changes to come sure isn’t a happy thing. I don’t think he intended it as in, him wanting you to fix it for him looking at you, he probaby knows that this is hard on you and thought it would make you feel better. I think it was just a boy brain moment.

As for not “embracing” the weight gain. Wtf. That’s just ignorant. It’s going to take some coming to terms with. I think it’s totally normal to be feeling a bit self concious about it. I sure would. It doesn’t mean you’re not embracing the pregnancy. Changes are scary! Nothing wrong with feeling that. 

Post # 16
7997 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

I’d probably react the same… but I do suggest you use the stuff.. and lots of it. It does help.

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