Gift / Thank You Card question

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
197 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

We sent thank yous to every guest, regardless is they sent a gift or not. I agree with your husband, send a generic thank you for coming!

Post # 4
Member
1233 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@mintblush:  +1! We made personal thank you’s to those that gave gifts and generic thank you’s to those that didn’t. In the end, everybody got a card.

Post # 5
Member
667 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Was it purchased off a registry? Most registries (with the exception of BB&B) have a  “thank you list” that show you who bought what… you may want to start there.

 

Post # 6
Member
11002 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

@classyashley:  +1.  I would pursue the registry option.  Also, alert key individuals (your parents, siblings, best friends, bridal party) that you received X number of gifts that did not have a card with them and that you don’t know whom to thank.  That way, if one of those individuals happens to say, “Oh, I hope Somerrae and Mr. Somerrae like the _________ that we gave them — we didn’t hear from them, and now I’m worried,” those closest to you will know to explain what happened and will be able to help you solve the mystery.

I agree with you. Sending a generic thank-you note will not do anything at all to help solve this particular issue.  If someone gave you two place settings of china, I think they would find it odd that you bothered to send them a note but made no mention whatsoever of their gift.

Post # 7
Member
3223 posts
Sugar bee

Do not send a generic thanks for coming. Besides being a little excessive (you’ve already thanked people twice for coming, so a 3rd time is just too much.  “No really this time for sure, I know I’ve said it before, but seriously ….”) If I was the person who’s card got seperated and I got a thanks for coming, I would call you to make sure you had received my gift, because otherwise I would have expected that to have been mentioned.  Then you’d probably have to send another thank you for the gift, since you now know it was me that sent it.  You wouldn’t want to not thank me.  It’s a lot more work for you.

I would spread the word through family and friends that a few gifts got separated from their cards, but that the gifts are awesome, and you want to know who has such great taste.

Then you can properly thank the giver.

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