Curious as to how couples handle giving gifts when you're giving as a couple to a single individual who may be closer to one person in the couple than both. Do you tend to be more generous because it's coming from two of you or do you give what you would've given if it were just from you and sign the card that it's from the two of you? Does that change if the individual is family (on either side)?
I would say that since two are giving the gift I might spend a tad more than I would on my own - but that doesn't necessarily mean I would double the gift value.
Really a gift is a gift. The couple/person should be thankful. I don't think the cost of the gift or whether it came from one of two people should be analyized.
Ya know - my brother doesn't get twice the Christmas/Birthday present now that I'm married and it's coming from two people :) As far as weddings go - my gift giving size/value has not changed since I got married.
my FI and I just talked about this last nite re: wedding gifts for friends and fam. We agreed that the amount we'd spend on gifts would increase bc there are 2 of us, therefore more spending power.
close friends and family of either of us would get substantial gifts.
We probably spend a little more than we would have individually, but not a lot. The fact is that together we have twice as many people to buy presents for as we ever did alone. So really we couldn't afford to spend twice as much on all those people - the numbers just don't work out.
And his family just doesn't give presents like mine does - so there's a difference in thinking to overcome. Example - my sister got me two tickets to the Santa Fe Wine and Chile festival for my birthday last year - total about $250. I got my sister a Roomba - about the same. Last year for his brother's birthday he got him a nice hardback book - total about $35 - and for his birthday his mom sent him a $50 iTunes card and a nice, long letter. They spend more at Christmas, but they just don't do big birthday presents. Luckily we seem to agree on what's appropriate for a wedding present. Some holidays they ignore altogether - I sent his mom flowers for Mother's Day (from the two of us) and she immediately called me to say thanks - she said she hasn't gotten more than a phone call (not even a card) from him for years.
I'm more of a gift giver than he is, so a lot of times, particularly when it's more of a "my friend" than "our friend" I'll buy something and just ask if he wants to sign the card. (I have several friends who'll sign gifts from them and their kids, so I guess it's sort of equivalent...)
Other than that, I'd say we're more like suzanno -- more than we would've spent on our own, but less than double.
Curious as to how couples handle giving gifts when you're giving as a couple to a single individual who may be closer to one person in the couple than both. Do you tend to be more generous because it's coming from two of you or do you give what you would've given if it were just from you and sign the card that it's from the two of you? Does that change if the individual is family (on either side)?
posted by cwj Newbee: 6 posts 8 months agoI would say that since two are giving the gift I might spend a tad more than I would on my own - but that doesn't necessarily mean I would double the gift value.
Really a gift is a gift. The couple/person should be thankful. I don't think the cost of the gift or whether it came from one of two people should be analyized.
Ya know - my brother doesn't get twice the Christmas/Birthday present now that I'm married and it's coming from two people :) As far as weddings go - my gift giving size/value has not changed since I got married.
posted by jilian Helper bee: 356 posts 8 months agomy FI and I just talked about this last nite re: wedding gifts for friends and fam. We agreed that the amount we'd spend on gifts would increase bc there are 2 of us, therefore more spending power.
close friends and family of either of us would get substantial gifts.
posted by GetMarried4Less Busy bee: 917 posts 7 months agoWe probably spend a little more than we would have individually, but not a lot. The fact is that together we have twice as many people to buy presents for as we ever did alone. So really we couldn't afford to spend twice as much on all those people - the numbers just don't work out.
And his family just doesn't give presents like mine does - so there's a difference in thinking to overcome. Example - my sister got me two tickets to the Santa Fe Wine and Chile festival for my birthday last year - total about $250. I got my sister a Roomba - about the same. Last year for his brother's birthday he got him a nice hardback book - total about $35 - and for his birthday his mom sent him a $50 iTunes card and a nice, long letter. They spend more at Christmas, but they just don't do big birthday presents. Luckily we seem to agree on what's appropriate for a wedding present. Some holidays they ignore altogether - I sent his mom flowers for Mother's Day (from the two of us) and she immediately called me to say thanks - she said she hasn't gotten more than a phone call (not even a card) from him for years.
posted by suzanno Bumble bee: 2,425 posts 7 months agoI'm more of a gift giver than he is, so a lot of times, particularly when it's more of a "my friend" than "our friend" I'll buy something and just ask if he wants to sign the card. (I have several friends who'll sign gifts from them and their kids, so I guess it's sort of equivalent...
)
Other than that, I'd say we're more like suzanno -- more than we would've spent on our own, but less than double.
posted by princesskittyHI Helper bee: 410 posts 7 months ago