Post # 1
Ok bees, I have a question for you, I just need to know if this would be totally weird or not. I don’t know if any of you remember mentioning to me that DH’s brother and wife are TTC right now because they “announced” it one night at dinner. I thought that was a little strange at the time, but to each their own, I guess! DH and I agreed that we would only announce once we had success TTC, and thank goodness we got our BFP on the 3rd cycle trying and with A TON of resources: I read TCOYF, was charting on FF, using OPKs, using Pre-seed, drinking Fertili Tea, taking a VitB complex, and I ate pineapple core (YUCK, but maybe worth it :P) and took extra DHA during TWW. Anyways, now that we are expecting our little baby, I have all this extra stuff: a ton of OPK’s, 2 un-opened boxes of Pre-seed, and the TCOYF book. Would it be weird to ask SIL if she wants any/all of that / just give it to her? I know MIL told her to chart her BBT, but after reading TCOYF and being around all you lovely bees, I realized there is a TON more that you can do to optimize your chances of getting pregnant.
So what do you gals think, would you be offended if someone who just got a BFP announced it and then gave you the book TCOYF, Pre-seed, and OPKs if you were trying and the person who gave you that stuff knew you were trying? Keep in mind she is like THE NICEST girl in the world and I have never seen her get too dramatic or upset about anything. Plus, they were pretty up front about their TTC plans, so I just don’t know if she would appreciate the gesture or if it would totally offend her. I just know that I have learned so much (mostly from WB) in the past 3 months, that if I hadn’t found WB and found out about all the great resources, I would still be one of those lost souls that thinks you only have to have sex a few times to get pregnant. I would like to give it to her as like, “I know you guys were trying too, so this is what helped us so quickly and I don’t need this stuff anymore,” and not trying to rub the fact in that we got pregnant before them or anything. It’s just something that is pretty awkward to talk about, but I really do want to give her the stuff so they can get pregnant sooner, too (like I really have their best interests in mind). Thoughts appreciated, thanks for reading 🙂
Post # 3
I feel like the books are ok to gift & would be really appreciated but OPK’s & pre-seed are a little too personal IMO.
Post # 4
I wouldn’t just gift it to her, but I’d talk to her, mention everything I have and ask her if she wanted any of it.
Post # 5
I would def ask her if she wants it! That’s stuff is expensive! And I would have been thrilled to get it from someone, personally!
Post # 6
As somone who tried for 19 cycles… that shit adds up. I wouldn’t just blind side her with it, but I’d ask if she uses any of it, and be clear that the pre-seed is unopened.
Post # 7
I would like to pre-meditate my post by saying regardless of if you give to her or not, its a super nice gesture aand think she will perceive it in nothing but the nicest way possible.
Barring that, I guess it would depend on her approach to TTC. If she’s the type to take more of a laid back approach or if she’s really into getting to know her body and to maximize her fertility each month. I personally plan to pass on my knowledge (and OPKs/CBEFM) to my best friend who’s looking to TTC in a few months (but maybe that’s different than a SIL – hmmm). If I hadn’t been stalking the bee forums I would have no clue of the resources available for a couple that is TTC.
Post # 8
After I got my bfp, I asked my friend who was ttc if she wanted my big batch of opk’s. she was thrilled and ended up getting her bfp the next month after using them. She claims they were lucky because they were from me 🙂
Post # 9
That is nicest thing you could do for her. I’m sure she would appreciate it!
Post # 10
@cowgirlace: It is all how you approach it– I would pull her aside and say “Katie, I remember you mentioned that you and Tom were trying to get pregnant. I know how expensive some of the pre-pregnancy resources can be. If you would like, I have extra ovulation detectors and pre-seed and a whole bunch of other stuff. If not, that is totally fine, but I just don’t want it to go to waste”
Post # 11
I think a major factor is that she announced she was TTC. I agree with the bee who mentioned having a discussion before gifting is a good idea.
Post # 12
- Wedding: March 2014 - Narrawallee reserve/beach & Mollymook golf club
The preseed might be a little too much, but the book and OPKs are great!
Post # 13
I’d appreciate all of it of I were her! That stuff is expensive!
Post # 14
I would casually slip it into conversation somewhere… “Hey, just so you know, I have a bunch of (X, Y, &Z) If you want any of it, it’s yours!”
Post # 15
I think since you are all family now, help a girl out! It can be overwhelming to try to figure all this stuff out and since you two have a good relationship I’d offer away!
Post # 16
I think it’s very sweet of you to want to help her! 🙂 Like some of the PP’s stated, I think you should talk with her and let her know what you have and that she welcomed to have any of it. Hope it all works out! 🙂