Gifting parents that are not helping with the wedding cost/otherwise?

posted 3 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
1158 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@pacNWbride:  My parents are not helping us financially but I a definitely giving them a gift.  To me, the gift symbolizes an overall thank you for the love and support, not just on my wedding day or the events leading up to it, but for throughout my life.

As for what to get, that depends on your budget. A nice gift would be a picture frame, where they can put in a picture from the wedding (e.g. your mom and you, your mom, you and your husband, etc.)

Post # 4
3570 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

They raised you as single mom’s, so definitely yes.  We gave our parents a framed e-pic of us. 

Post # 5
3635 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I would say a nice card and thank you would be enough if you don’t have money for more.  If you want to spoil them and they have been supportive, gift certs for mani-pedi or massages, maybe. 

Post # 6
3199 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@pacNWbride:  my mom hasn’t helped financially and has tried to make my wedding planning process as stressful as possible, so no, we won’t be getting her a gift. however, FI’s mom has helped a LOT financially and has been very accommodating of everything that we want, so if its in the budget closer to the day we plan on getting her something. maybe my dad, because although he hasn’t helped financially he has been very sweet and supportive – and he’s walking me down the aisle, of course.

Post # 7
6948 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

@pacNWbride:  You don’t have to buy them anything big. A frame for your wedding picture, a small necklace or bracelet (like from Kohls… not anything fancy) to commemorate the day… anything they’d like that just tells them you appreciate their moral support and making you the person you are today. 

Post # 8
756 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I’m either doing a frame or a cutely written note indicating that they’ll get a lovely photo book 


(I’ll get them off Shutterfly for like $30 when they go on sale after the wedding)

Post # 9
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

We gave both sets of parents and grandparents framed pictures from the wedding.

It was cheap, it was fast, and everyone was happy!

Post # 10
5087 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2014

Neither set of parents are contributing to the wedding financially but my mum is using her talents to diy decorations and invites. We are going to honour our parents with gifts because of how important they are to us in our lives and how valued they are. 

For my mum – perfume 

for my dad – gardening vouchers 

for ffil – bottle of wine 

for Fmil – a photoframe with an e-pic 

Post # 11
4576 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

They shouldn’t be expecting a gift, so in that regard: no. However, *because* they won’t be expecting one, it will mean that much  more 🙂 I love the idea of a frame for the photos. You also can purchase embroidered handkerchiefs with a wedding-day message on them 🙂

Post # 12
2818 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I need this thread bad. My parents have been absolute jerks and I don’t want to gift them anything. However, I realize how bad it will look to give gifts to other people and not them. I like the idea of a framed photo, but we don’t have any prints of our e-pics. I’m at a loss because I can guarantee that any gift I give either of them will not be from the heart, but from a filial duty to help them avoid embarassment by not receiving anything at their daughter’s wedding. Alternatively, I guess I could just give my other gifts privately and give no gifts at the rehearsal dinner. 

Post # 13
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

Nice frames they can fill with a photo from the wedding when we get our images back after the wedding.  It’s small but personal.  If you don’t have a place holder pic, add a little poem or personal thank you note to the frame.

Post # 14
6158 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

my mom is paying for our wedding and FI is paying for the rehearsal dinner.

his family is not contributing.

we are planning on getting my mom a really nice gift.  i am not sure what we will be getting his mother.


Post # 15
11300 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

It depends on your relationship witht hem, I guess.

My mother is not contributing, financially, emotionally, etc. We are not close and have not been for several years. She will not be getting a gift or recognition. We are almost 18 months into our engagement, 24 days from the wedding, and she has yet to even mention our engagement/wedding. I am her only child.

FI’s parents have been great, albeit a bit frustrating. They will be getting photobooks and we got a nice bottle of wine from our favorite winery for his dad and stepmom because they’ve been a HUGE help and are throwing our rehearsal dinner.

Post # 16
4941 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@pacNWbride:  My MIL didn’t help us at all, but we still gave her a gift. She raised DH, that’s more than enough to elicit a gift, I think. 🙂

I definitely think if your parents are in your lives, then they should receive something just as a token and knowing that you care. Even if it’s something as simple as a very sentimental thank you card or a handwritten note. 

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