Post # 1
Should my fiance and I get gifts for our bridal party if we are paying for the dresses and tuxes? I know it’s standard for the bridal party to pay for their own attire and for the bride and groom to give each of them a gift. But we thought it would be better for most of the bridal party if we paid for all of that, as some of them don’t have a lot of money and most of them are coming from out of town and will have to pay a lot in travel expenses.
We also plan on getting some jewellery for the bridesmaids and some nice, sports related cufflinks for the groomsmen. Is that enough of a gift? Is that even considered a gift since all of those items will be used for the wedding?
I guess I’m wondering if they will be expecting a gift in addition to all of this? I don’t want things to be awkward, but I’m also not sure how to say “Since we paid for your attire, we won’t be providing a gift”…,
Has anyone else done it this way?? Or has anyone been in a bridal party like this? What did you think?
Post # 3
If you are paying for everyones attire i wouldnt worry about a gift. This is a very generous gift you two paying because this is usually something the party should be prepared to pay for. I would just write them all a nice thank you letter!
Post # 4
You should still get them something that they can hang on to after the wedding, but it can be something small since you are paying for everything else.
Post # 5
@ADogLover123: I doubt they will be expecting an additional gift. I would just write them a heartfelt card of thanks for their support of your relationship and wedding.
Post # 6
I think what you are doing is enough. And giving jewelery and cufflinks may be for the wedding, but they will still have those items long after – I bought necklaces for my BMs and I have seen all of them wear theirs again.
A heart-felt note or card to each will probably be most appreciated by them!
Post # 7
@ADogLover123: I don’t think it is neccessary if you have already paid for the dresses and the tuxes. I think that is a pretty good gift in itself just because the costs of being in a wedding can be high sometimes. That was really nice of you guys to do that.
Post # 8
@ADogLover123: I think you’re going to get some Bees that say you absolutely still have to get them a gift since they will be having other expenses as well and some Bees that say the attire is a gift in itself. I personally think that you shouldn’t have to get them anything else, if I were a BM and the bride paid for a dress I would think that it’s more than enough! Chances are the attire is more than you would pay for a gift anyways. But you know your BM, if you think they’ll be offended that they weren’t given a gift, maybe you could get them something small like earrings or a nice wrap.
Post # 9
I am paying for dresses, hair & make-up. They do not know this though. Being that we are all a bit older & not terribly into knickknacks, the only gift I plan on giving is a thoughtful note & a nice bottle of wine (& depending on final budget, perhaps a gc for a pedicure.)
Post # 10
@ADogLover123: If I were in your bridal party and you paid for my dress I would not in any way expect an additional gift. As PP’s have said it would be a sweet gesture to write each person a letter telling them how much it means to you to have them with you on such a day.
Post # 10
Like others said, I would not expect a gift. However, it would definitly add an unexpected sentimental touch if you wrote them a card or did something like that. As part of my BMs gift, I’m giving them empty picture frames with a note that says “IOU a picture of us on our wedding day”. Maybe do something like that? Inexpensive but sentimental?
Post # 11
I agree with the above. We are paying for everything for our bridesmaids (and groomsman) and have thought a nice piece of jewerlly for the BM and cufflinks for the GM would be nice to be used on the day and also they can use in the future. Thank you for the suggestion to adding a nice thank you card after the wedding – I would be more appreciative of a nice card with special words then another gift too.
Post # 12
Ive been wondering what the ettique was for gifting to bridal party, I have my sister as MOH and 2 friends i’ve known a long time as BMs. I don’t really want to tell them that my gift to them is that their dresses, shoes, jewellery and makeup will be paid for by me… I spent a long time looking around for thigns myself first before taking them there because i wanted to make sure the things I pick out are things they can wear again in the future… maybe I should pick out something a little more sentimental instead of a card and some chocolates…