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Gifts for parents when you're paying?

posted 3 years ago in Gifts and Registries
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    1.
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    Busy bee
    FutureMrsMorgan    May 9, 2009   Los Angeles, CA

    We are paying for our wedding ourselves.  My FMIL is paying for the rehearsal dinner so we'll probably get her a parents photo album or something.  Do we have to get gifts for the parents that are not helping us?  I know its a nice gesture, but can it be a smaller, token gift?  Like a framed picture or something and not a whole photo album?

    Thanks

     
    2.
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    Blushing bee
    ali925    May 23, 2009   Chicago

    I think any gift, small or large, will be nice.  Maybe you can make an album for your parents using shutterfly or any other picture website. 

     
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    Sugar bee
    rosychicklet    September 27, 2008   Boston, MA

    My parents and my ILs were paying and I got them sentimental but reasonably priced photo gifts.

    I think going for someting sentimental (but not expensive) is the way to go.  Like an embroidered hankie, a bottle of wine, photo/frame, etc.

     
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    Helper bee
    nurseheather30    10/03/2009   Baltimore MD

    I think we will do pictures or something sentimental for them, we are paying for the entire wedding with no contributions from anyone, but I think gifts are a nice gesture.

     
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    Sugar bee
    GaBGal    September 25, 2010  

    For me, if we get gifts for our parents it will be more like... "thank you for supporting us, loving us and raising us to be ready for this day" not "thank you for paying/hosting/planning my wedding".

    Do what you think is appropriate for your relationship with your parents

     
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    Busy bee
    Niki    05/31/2008  

    We paid for our own wedding too and we gave my parents a Blurb.com album of our engagement and wedding photos and they LOVED it!  Granted, it was many months later, but I told them their gift was going to be a while.

     
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    Helper bee
    djmaddiebluedog    06/06/09   Connecticut

    i agree with gabBgal - the gift is more of a thank you for all they have done before the wedding, not for paying for the wedding.  if you are tight on money, get them something meaningful. what if you wrote a heart-felt thank you for all they have done, and got a calligrapher to write it out for you?  then you could frame it and give that to them.  

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    Erindesmar    October 17, 2009   Boston, MA

    I agree with gab8gal and others that the gift is not necessarily a "thank you" for the wedding, but for everything else in life.  I think a nice card and perhaps a framed family photo or something along those lines would be appropriate.

     
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    Worker bee
    miss sweets    8/7/2010  

    I plan on giving my parents sentimental gifts, even though they are not paying for the wedding. They are contributing towards it, but it is way more about how they have raised me and a gift from me to my ILs will be about thanking them for raising such a gentleman to be my husband for life! I am not sure what to get my ILs yet but I will get my dad a pure silver coin engraved with something special between us to carry in his pocket the day of the wedding since he collects coins for fun and my mom will probably need an embroidered hankie since she will be crying throughout the ceremony!

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    Honey
    Beekeeper
    ejs4y8    June 20, 2009  

    My parents aren't paying for our wedding either, but they did gift us our honeymoon as our wedding present. I'd like to give them a photo album, too, although I'm afraid they'll find it an unecessary expenditure. But other than that, I have no ideas what to get my parents and my FI's mother.

    Where does it stop? Mother? Father? Grandparents? Eek. I'm kind of thinking mini photo albums that I can put together myself on Shutterfly after I get the high-res DVD back from my photog. Yay! 

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    Worker bee
    yellowrose    10/3/09   Dallas

    they're called gifts because that's what they are. they're not obligations.

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