Gifts for the Bridesmaids and Groomsmen?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
52 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I think you’re perfectly ok to not get them an additional gift if you are already paying for everything else. That said, they are giving up their time and energy to be there to support you, so I would definitely acknowledge it… write them each a meaningful, personal note about how much their friendship has meant to you and how much you value their presence and support at your wedding.

Post # 4
Member
455 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

itsmeetam:  Gifts are never required. And a heartfelt note is often more meaningful than any material gift could ever be.

Post # 5
Member
288 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

itsmeetam:  They are spending their time to be with you on your special day.  So yes, I think you should get them something.  It doesn’t have to be anything flashy.  Handwritten note with a bottle of wine/lotion/candle/chocolates.  Check out etsy.  They have some things that are affordable if you wanted to go trinket.

Post # 6
Member
310 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

itsmeetam:  I feel like if you are paying for their dresses, make-up, hair and shoes then a gift isn’t necessary. Especially if they haven’t helped out with anything else. Mine haven’t done much and some have done nothing, and I didn’t pay for any of their clothes and we are doing our own hair and make-up. I am getting them gifts, but the two that helped out will get something extra.

If you do want to give something small, maybe do a card with a gift card to a coffeeshop for the bridesmaids and you could throw a can of pop with a tiny bottle of alcohol tied to it with a card for the groomsmen. Cheap gift to say thanks and I am sure they would be happy. It isn’t like they were require to do much work.

Post # 8
Member
288 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

itsmeetam: Oh so she’s getting “like that”.  Well she may need a reminder of who is paying for all of this.  The answer to where it all stops…well you and FI say where it stops TBH.  I would have your FI talk to her.  It is not necessary to spend a garillion dollars when you are already paying for everything else.  If I were in your situation $20 to $30 per girl tops. 

I have six girls (My FI had a wedding vision, he now regrets his desicion since checks are being cashed lol)  I’m getting them candles and lotion from Bath and Body works that I found on sale ($10)  A necklace ($20)  and I’m going to put one more thing in there, I haven’t decided.  About $50 bucks per gift bagl.  I’m also paying for hair. 

 

Post # 9
Member
517 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

I was also going to suggest just writing a sweet message to them in a card and maybe just do a framed photo of the two of you. Paying for dresses, shoes and H/M is very generous.

Post # 10
Member
3200 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I think after paying for their dresses, hair, and makeup…you’ve pretty much given them their “gift.” There is no need to get them anything else. I know most people will say that if it’s a “prop” or necessary for your wedding then it doesn’t count as a gift, but in this case I completely disagree. It would be different if they paid for everything themselves and you didn’t get them a gift. You’ve basically made this cost free for your ladies and the groomsmen. A nice card with a handwritten note thanking them for being with you is more than enough at this point.

Post # 11
Member
18 posts
Newbee

Girl, you are doing enough!!! I am in the same situation. Mine haven’t helped me and I like you hardly asked. I am paying for my girls jewelry, got them a robe to get ready in and have paid for them all to get their hair and makeup done professionally. A card would be the only thing else I would get them. 

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