- 5 years ago
- Wedding: August 2012
I got married in August and there was one particular girl that stood out in my mind as a total pain in the @$$ guest. She was invited because she was dating my husband’s friend. I didn’t really know the girl, but we were giving anyone in a relationship a chance to bring their SO.
The first thing this girl did to stir up drama was to say that pretty much every decision I made for the wedding was dumb. After that point, I didn’t try to reach out to this friend’s girlfriend and keep her involved because she just wasn’t very nice to me when I did.
When it came time for my shower I had pretty much forgotten/forgiven but I didn’t tell my sister to invite her to the shower because I had no real conversations with this girl ever, outside of the one time that she dissed my wedding ideas and figured she wasn’t super close to me and might feel weird about getting an invite to such an intimate gathering, especially because you’re basically asked to bring a gift to a shower.
I wasn’t thinking about the fact that we have mutual friends, and she was upset that she didn’t get an invite, probably because her friends did. I completely understand her feeling a bit leftout, but she should have realized that a bridal shower is not a time to get to know someone, it’s a time to share with people that are already close to you.
I sent her a facebook message (a private one) because I didn’t have any other way to communicate with her. I told her I was so sorry that she felt left out and if I had know that she wanted an invite I would have told my sister to invite her. I then told her I think it would be a lot of fun if she joined us for the bachelorette party (we were just going to dinner and the bars, I requested that people didn’t bring gifts or anything). She never responded.
Sure enough the day of the bachelorette party this girl has the nerve to tell her boyfriend that I was not nice to HER! She said she could tell that she wasn’t wanted, etc. Her boyfriend told my now husband, that asked me why I was being so mean to this girl!!! I was like WHAT?????? I fricken APOLOGIZED for something that I shouldn’t even really need to feel bad about (but that’s just who I am, I don’t like to hurt people!)
Then, the day of the wedding she gets antsy and wants to go home, except that she and her boyfriend carpooled to our wedding with several of our friends. So she basically drags our friends home early even though they expressed an interest in staying.
I find out later from our mutual friends that the entire time this girl has been downright nasty to me. Telling our mutual friends not to hang out with me, dissing my inexpensive engagement ring, and telling them that I was basically a crazy b*tc#. They basically said not to bother with her, and that although she is nice to them, she has been nothing but mean to me. They thought it might stem from the fact that she wanted to get married and she wasn’t yet.
Well…. fast forward to this week. They get engaged. Last night they had a party but my husband and I couldn’t attend because we already had plans. But if I had attended, I don’t know what I would have done. I am NOT happy for this couple. I am not a fake person, and I don’t know how to lie very well. I’m actually really shaken and upset that this is even going down. The last thing I want is to have to deal with this girl the rest of my life. I was really hoping he’d wake up and realize who she is.
Of course, I hear her ring is huge and expensive. And she’s getting married, so she’s getting exactly what she wants. So maybe the jealousy has subsided and she’ll be nice to me, but at this point, I’ve made up my mind that this girl is trouble. How can I manage this? We have so many mutual friends that I’m sure will be talking about their wedding. We will probably get invited because of my husband. Have you ever had to deal with a bride that you just don’t get along with?