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God Parents... who are they?

posted 1 year ago in Babies
  • poll: God Parents... who are they?
    Family to the child (uncle, aunt, cousin) : (24 votes)
    30 %
    Not family to the child (friend) : (10 votes)
    12 %
    God parents are "together" (i.e. married, dating) : (12 votes)
    15 %
    God parents are not "together" : (14 votes)
    17 %
    other : (5 votes)
    6 %
    Don't need god parents : (16 votes)
    20 %
  •  
    1.
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    Honey bee
    yrret107    November 28, 2009   Seattle, WA; Married in West Chester, PA

    Me and DH were having a discussion about god parents for our children when we have them.

    I always thought god parents were a family friend, not related to the baby. I don't think it matters if the god parents are "together" or not.

    DH had god parents that was an uncle on his dad side and a best friend of his mom side.

    What do you think?

    Does it matter if it is family or not family? or a couple or a non-couple?

    ETA: My god parents were a family friend of my parents.  I knew them the first few years of my life but then they moved away and my parents don't have any way of communicating with them.  It's sad. I would love to catch up with them and see how they are doing.

    I do like the idea of god parents because if something were to happened to us, I at least know they will be taken care of.  I googled this article which I think sums it up pretty well.  Here.

     

     
    2.
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    Honey bee
    caszos    June 2010   Florida

    My uncle is my god-father and a family friend is my god-mother.  

    Over the years we have obviously stayed more in touch with my family member.  However, my god-mother did make it to my wedding :) 

     
    3.
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    5,241 posts
    Bee Keeper
    cbee    July 26, 2010  

    As far as I know, God parents are special people in your lives that you would like to be honored when you have your baby.  They will (hopefully) be special people in the life of the child.  They are basically just people you want to be in the child's life.  I don't think it matters if they are related or not.  My uncle is my godfather and a family friend is my godmother. 

     
    4.
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    1,575 posts
    Bumble bee
    jaylii9    September 5, 2010  

    I actually have two sets of Godparents! One set is my Aunt and Uncle (Dad's sister). My other set of Godparents are close family friends of my parents. Three out of 4 of these people will be at my wedding! Unfortunately, my Aunt passed away a year and a half ago.

    When we have kids I have no idea who we will pick because FI is an only child and my family situation is hard at times (meaning my siblings are not good candidates).

     
    5.
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    839 posts
    Busy bee
    Missbliss      

    I'm a God-mother to a friend's daughter.  From my point of view, a God-parent is someone whose faith you respect who is willing to pray for, love, cherish, and guide your child.  A God-parent will be another respected adult in their lives beyond the parents and grandparents.  Sometimes, it makes sense that this person is a family member, but at other times, it would be appropriate for it to be a good friend of the family.  While I am a God-parent, I actually was not given God-parents myself.  So I know it is not a necessity, but as a God-parent, I really feel that it is a special thing! 

     
    6.
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    1,646 posts
    Bumble bee
    Boston Bee      

    My god-parents are my uncle on my mom's side and aunt on my dad's side.  My mom said that my parents didn't choose their close friends because they knew that family would always be there, but not necessarily friends. And alas, my parents had a falling out with the people they were considering for my godparents and haven't spoken to them in years. But it can go either way.  I don't think that they have to be together, but they could be.  I'm not religious, so I don't plan on ever accepting a god-parent position or having them for the future child(ren) I have, so you don't have to have them at all.

     
    7.
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    Bee Keeper
    lilyfaith    June 23, 2012   Lakeview, Chicago

    My godparents are my (married) aunt and uncle. 

    I always wonder: do you choose godparents if you're not having your kids baptized? Can you call them something else to signify that they are your child's "second parents"? There don't seem to be hard and fast rules, and although my godparents stood up at my baptism, they were not involved in any religious aspect of my upbringing. In fact, they weren't really religious until they had kids years later. 

     
    8.
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    1,646 posts
    Bumble bee
    Boston Bee      

    @lilyfaith: I was wondering the same thing. Not being religious, I obviously don't plan on baptising/christening my kid(s), but I think the idea of "second parents." I'm very close with my god parents, so I would want people like that in my kid(s)'s live(s), but without any type of religious affiliation. We should just make something up!

     
    9.
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    316 posts
    Helper bee
    MrsT2Bee    June 12, 2010   Ontario, Canada

    I don't have god parents, but my understanding was that your god parents would be the ones who raise you if your parents die. Soo... wouldn't it make sense that they be a couple? Am I way off base here? 

    So if I'm on the right track here, I would say it should be anyone (couple) that you trust to take care of your children. I can definately see the arguement that it should be a family member, in case of a falling out with friends.

     
    10.
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    yrret107    November 28, 2009   Seattle, WA; Married in West Chester, PA

    I don't call myself 'religious' but I do consider myself a catholic.  (If that makes sense... lol)

    My DH is a lutheran and doesn't neccessarily want our child to be raised catholic... if he can help it.  So I would like the god parent role but not have a big emphasis on religion.

     
    11.
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    yrret107    November 28, 2009   Seattle, WA; Married in West Chester, PA

    @MrsT2Bee:  I agree with you. I think that if something were to happen to me, it would be easier to take care of my child, if they were together.  But I'm sure if this were to happen, the non- couple people could do a good job or at least among themselves, decided who to should be the primary care taker.

    This does start to get into the idea of wills and stating that in your will what happens to the child. I'm only 26 and I don't want to even start thinking about what to write in my will.  (haha, definitely can't give anything away cuz I'm in debt. Uhhh, anyone want to inherit my debt??? lol )

     
    12.
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    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    In my family godparents are chosen to ensure the spiritual well-being of a child. It is usually family, and not necessarily a couple. Also, in my family, god parents do not = people who would raise the child in case of the death of parents. Two totally separate things. 

     
    13.
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    1,376 posts
    Bumble bee
    thisismeAXiD    April 2013   NE Wisconsin

    My sister's god parents are my mom's oldest sister and my mom's next oldest BIL.

     

    My god parents are my 2 oldest cousins. That being said, my mom is the youngest of 5 and her oldest sibiling is 14 years older than her. So my god parents are my cousins who are 18 years older than me.

     

     

    Edit: My mom's next oldest sister to her would have taken care of my sister and I if anything were to happen to her.

     
    14.
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    Bumble bee
    lemondrop    March 13, 2010   Arizona

    Also not really religious here-

    To me they should be anyone who is going to love, support, and set a good example for your child. 

    I chose my godparents when I was 13 and got baptised, they were close family friends. 

     
    15.
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    Beekeeper
    ejs4y8    June 20, 2009  

    My niece and nephews' godparents are blood related aunts and uncles. (mom's brother or dad's brothers).

     
    16.
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    Busy bee
    shaunna    October 9, 2011   UK

    I don't have a baby yet, but when I do I'm sure that the godparents will be married and will probably be close family or friends (around our age).

    My godparents were my dad's first cousin (who's my dad's best friend) and his wife (who's really close to my mum). We're all very close.

     
    17.
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    Helper bee
    Bailzoe    August 2010  

    My God parents were my mother's MoH and my father's BM. They weren't related to the family at all. I haven't talked to my Godfather since I was in grade school, and I haven't talked to my Godmother since I was in middle school. They moved away, had their own kids, got married, etc. They are strangers to me.

    I don't know who I'd want for Godparents for our children. I'm inclined to pick our siblings because family is always around but friends might change (just because of my experience with my godparents). On the flip side, Fiance's godparents are his aunt and uncle that are least involved with his life compared to all his other aunts and uncles.

     

     
    18.
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    Buzzing bee
    ribbons    June 12, 2010  

    My godparents are my mom's brother and one of her cousins. The godmother didn't even come to my wedding!

     

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