(Closed) Going back to LDR :(

posted 7 years ago in Long Distance Relationships
Post # 3
Member
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I’m with you. We were LDR for almost a year, living together for 4 years and just went back to LDR last month since he left the country for work. I’ve noticed that it’s been harder on me this time, I think it’s because we are planning the wedding.

Just keep telling yourself that once this is over you guys are going to be married and together forever. (Sometimes I have to remind myself 50 times a day 🙂 )

Post # 4
Member
1510 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Hugs!! Good luck!

Post # 5
Member
187 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I was in a similar situation. We were long distant for about 1.5years, then after I graduated from school we lived with his family for the summer. It was great to see each other all the time and not calculate our time together–always looking forward to the next time. We were supposed to move to TX together for his job but two weeks before the move I got a great job offer in NYC and couldn’t pass it up. It was the hardest decision I’ve ever made.

This year apart has actually been easier, mostly because I’m not at school which reminds me so much of him. I’ve also been able to travel more often to see him since school doesn’t take up all my time. However, I also just felt like we were so used to the whole process we fell right back into it–sadly.

But, like effinjess said planning apart is hard at times. At first it was great b/c I got to plan and think all the time and not have him roll his eyes. But now, there’s projects he wants to be apart of and physically can’t–like invites, etc. One suggestion I have for you is to gauge how much your FI wants to be involved (this may change over time too)–do you need weekends alone dedicated to planning? I never thought my FI would want to be crafty but he literally told me to stop doing so much so he could take part. I thought about sending him the materials but realized its about doing things together. He’s visiting this weekend to get our marriage license and meet with our priest and I worked in doing our OOT bags.

Whenever things get tough I always think although apart I’m so much happier to have him in my life, even though it hurts to be apart. We are the lucky ones to soon be married to the love of our lives Laughing Stay strong, this year will be fun and exciting even if you are apart!

Post # 6
Member
411 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I totally understand. My FH and I have been LDR for 5 years, but we always have summers together. The first few weeks of school were always so d*mn hard! We’re LDR this summer too, but we’ve finally graduated so hopefully we’ll be able to be in the same city soon.

LDRs suck. Soooo much. But you will be a much stronger couple because of it!

Post # 7
Member
4547 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I can’t relate to the whole LDR thing but I just wanted to say my heart goes out to you as I had some LDRs in college and it was always tough to readjust to being apart after spending a lot of time together. ***HUGS***

Post # 9
Member
383 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Sweetie, KEEP THAT CHIN UP!  😀  My fiance and I are also separated, for a year total, by 6,000 miles.  And lady, it blows.  I completely understand.  Hopefully you guys talk often and use skype (I find that videochat blows talking on the phone out of the water — it’s like he’s right here with me, and NOT in stupid Saudi Arabia).  In fact, since y’all are in the same time zone, you should totally have a skype date, like complete with dinner and wine on each of your sides.  My boo eats dinner while I eat breakfast, so it doesn’t really work as well…

But I know that suggestions only get you so far (distractions, skype, BLAHBLAHBLAH), and what you really need is to know that we, the caring, understanding, LDR-relationship-having women of weddingbee, are here to support you and cheer you on (and up!).  And we are, cookie.  You CAN do this!  Goooooooooooooooo TEAM!  ;P

Post # 10
Member
66 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

i know we cant do anything to change it but know that you are not alone. FI and I just moved in together and ended our LDR of 3 years and it is great to no longer have to worry about when he is leaving again (as he moved out with me for the summers). hang in there, you can do it, we did!

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