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Going the unconventional route…What do you think?

posted 1 year ago in Ceremony
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    Mrs.Crawfordtobee    April 9, 2011   Canton, Ohio

    After lots of talking and debating we have decided to cancel our reservation at The Quarry golf club where we were going to be married and have a small lunch reception. While this was supposed to be the simple cheaper route we feel that it is still not what we want and that we would still be spending more money than we really wanted to, even if only for the 50 guest we would have invited. I just couldn’t deal with the stress of the details and picking out this and deciding on that it was just becoming more than about us and the fact that we are devoting our lives to one another.

    To me that is what this is about and that is what I want the focus to be. I don’t want to be stressed out the day of our wedding worrying about this or that going right or anything of the sort. I want it to be a casual, relaxing special day for us. Neither of us want the “traditional” events that take place at most receptions. We both shudder at the thought of being put on the spot, don’t care much for dancing and don’t need the bouquet/garter toss, 1st dance, cake cutting etc. that most receptions have. Now please don’t think I am putting you down for having those things I think they are cute and special, but they are just not for us. I think that after a long time I am finally realizing that this day is about us and what we want, not the things that are unnecessary to us and things that we think we are being “pushed” to have.  People will be upset that they didn’t get invited (we both have large families but we are not all that close) and they will just have to understand that this is what we want. If anyone can’t believe we had the nerve to not have seats at our ceremony or can’t believe that we decided to have our wedding in this manner, it isn’t about them and they will just have to deal with it.

    So the new plan is: We have a beautiful park very close to our house and we have a few different areas of that park that we like and think would work for what we need. The park is usually not too busy and should be possible to just pick a location that day and perform the ceremony all within close walking distance of the parking area. So a Officiant, my FH and I, our 2 children, our parents, my grandfather, FH brothers their wives and kids, and my 2 best friends will meet at that park in one of those areas and have a short 10-15min. ceremony. We will have gasp no chairs, no decorations, and no music. I am hoping to have our closest family and friends stand in a circle around us during the ceremony because I really can’t think of anything better than being surrounded by people who love and support us while we say our vows to one another.  After the ceremony we are thinking either a nice lunch/dinner at Olive Garden, Macaroni Grill or to make it even more casual and go eat at Fox in the Hound (for those that don’t know it’s a sports bar/ restaurant with pool tables, dart boards, etc.)

    We will still be covering the tab at which ever place we decide to go, but still think it will be less expensive than our first option. I still plan on having a dress (casual, destination type), and spending the morning getting ready with my mom, and “step” daughter and FH will be getting ready with my son. If it should rain we will have umbrellas available and there is a nearby pavilion or two should we have to use it. We are still planning to have some pictures taken, but not thousands of $ worth and will probably do this before the ceremony in the park as well and then will have everyone else meet us there.

    I am sure there are things I haven’t thought about and things I am forgetting so please has anyone done anything like this or been to anything similar? While I am so nervous I am excited and relieved that we actually making this what we want it to be!! Any advice or thoughts? (Sorry so long)

     
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    SouthernTulip    October 23, 2010   Georgia

    I think that is really sweet!  I think that if it's more you and your FI then that is definitely what you should do :)

    I would suggest going to eat somewhere afterwards that you wouldn't normally go to though - just so it's a little more special.  But that's me :)

    -Good Luck!

     
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    PaperCrane       Married!

    I like it- do what makes you feel best you're absolutely right about not needing to have a huge production just to satisfy others.

     
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    MissTatas    August 6, 2011   Minneapolis, MN

    Sounds awesome to me. I would just check and make sure you dont need to rent the park. We have a lot of public parks near where I live, and even for a short 15-20 minute ceremony we would have to reserve it. It doesnt cost a huge amount and would give me peace of mind. I would hate to get fined on my wedding day :)

     
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    missmouse29    July 2011   NWOntario, Canada

    Honestly what you described sounds great. And frankly something I would love to do.. If it's something that is going to make you happy I say go for it, because no matter how fancy the event is or how much money you spend someone will always have a criticism, someone will always be disappointed or have a different opinion on what should have happened. That's just the nature of wedding, or any event really. You can't please everyone, but you can make sure that you & your SO are happy :)

     
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    Mrs.Crawfordtobee    April 9, 2011   Canton, Ohio

    Thanks everyone, you are  making me feel more relaxed about this decision! And @MissTatas thank you for the advice, because I never thought you would have to rent part of the park if you wern't actually setting anything up, but I will look into it to make sure!

     
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    lefeymw    April 16, 2011   CT

    I think that sounds lovely. Go For It!

     
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    neontl    April 2011   Seattle, WA

    You are right - at the end of the day, the most important thing is being with the ones you love to witness your vows to one another. That's what this thing is all about!

     
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    junabiona    December 19, 2010   Wilmington, DE

    Sounds sweet and quite a bit like this: http://offbeatbride.com/2010/01/ohio-cave-wedding

    One of the best weddings I've seen. I am traditional, but if it weren't for that, this is my ideal wedding.

     
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    Miss Twigs    July 23, 2011   Casper, WY

    Sounds like your wedding will be more fun than most.  Yay for the two of you and staying true to yourselves!

     
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    kfricke89    July 10, 2011   Dallas/ Ft Worth TX

    I love it! If I weren't so cought up in the big wedding dream than that is exactly what I would want to do. I agree with eating a a restaurant or place you wouldn't normally just to make the day even more special and out of the ordinary. You could even make that restaurant your anniversary spot. I think that would be sweet.

     
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    Totes Magotes    October 2011   Bucks County, PA

    I second kfricke's idea about the anniversary spot - perfect!

     
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    TingTing    September 12, 2010   Los Angeles

    i love your idea, especially being circled by your closest family and friends!

     
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    Miss Tattoo    September 15, 2012   Pittsburgh, PA

    This reminds me of http://www.2000dollarwedding.com

    They still had a wedding, but it was about them. After reading her blog my whole view changed. We are also having a park ceremony with an afternoon reception. There will be no DJ, just an ipod with a great list and lots of together time with the family. We are going to go to an Irish Pub later in the evening for an after party, but that's a pay your own way thing and not really part of the wedding.

     
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    Blushing bee
    zalonia       New York City

    @Mrs.Crawfordtobee:Your wedding is the epitome of what we want our wedding day to be!!! Just close friends, family...no stress, no drama, no planners.  Just us and those we love witnessing our union.  I too, am getting married in a park with a lunch reception!  Kudos to u!!!

     

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