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Perfect gift for my girls for bridal shower (pics included)

Going to have to burn somebody

posted 3 months ago in Etiquette
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    1.
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    Wannabee
    bestfriend    October 29, 2011  

    How's this for an odd situation?  Two of my bestest friends are talking about getting married (to each other) this summer.  Problem is, the three of us are all great friends and both want me to stand up with them.  I'm honored and very sad, because I'm pretty sure that's impossible.  I'm ever so slightly a better friends with the one I think is most likely to capitulate.  I would be happy to support either one of them, except I know it'll be breaking the other one's heart.  It's going to have to be their decision, but I'm totally bummed out about the whole thing.  I think it's especially hard because it's the first big bump in their planning, and I really feel their pain.

     
    2.
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    Bumble
    Beekeeper
    KatyElle      

    If they're getting married to each other, can't you just stand up there in support of both of them? What's the problem?

     
    3.
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    Sugar bee
    panterapeach    April 2011  

    @bestfriend:  are you stressed about what side you choose to stand on?

    I think I'm confused.

     
    4.
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    Bumble bee
    daybyday    November 11, 2006  

    I agree with KatyElle. It seems like standing up for them you'd have a chance to be there for each friend . . . not picking sides. I'd relax and just be happy for them and happy that you'll be an honored and cherished member of the wedding party, regardless of where you stand during the ceremony.

     
    5.
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    Bumble
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    KatyElle      

    Yeah I'm not getting why this has to be so dramatic/heartbreaking/someone is getting "burned". Just stand in support of both and be happy for them, pretty simple really.

     
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    2PeasinaPod       Philadelphia

    I'm definitely confused as well. I always saw the bridal party as supporting the couple...not an individual.

     
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    Bumble bee
    TwoCityBride    April 1, 2013  

    I agree if they are getting married to each other, then it doesn't matter as long as you are in the wedding party you are supporting both of them. I think if they are in love and getting married they aren't going to care what side you stand on.

     
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    SapphireSun    July 9, 2010   Vancouver, BC

    I highly doubt they're that concerned about it.  You'll be standing up for both of them in spirit, and where you physically stand will probably come down to just evening up the sides or which outifit they want you to wear or whatever.  Don't worry, I'm sure this isn't heart breaking for either of them :)

    I tend to think about this situation like the fact that I had DH's sister as a bridesmaid.  The fact that she was standing on my side definitely didn't mean that she was snubbing her brother; she just preferred to be a bridesmaid than a groomswoman.

     
    9.
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    Buzzing bee
    HisIrishPrincess    March 23, 2012  

    I agree with @KatyElle!  I think it would be really great for you to stand up for both.   

     
    10.
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    Honey bee
    MrsNeutrino    July 2012  

    could you instead of standing up for one of them... marry them instead? as in, get ordained 

     
    11.
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    Sugar bee
    abbie017    March 16, 2013  

    @SapphireSun:  I'm inclined to agree with this.  They're probably happy that you'll be up there for the two of them regardless of what side you'll be standing on.

     

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