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Hi Hive! (sort of long)
So my fiance is very into getting married...but not so into caring much about the details of the decor etc. (typical guy!!). However, one thing that he said that he would really like to have are goldfish or beta fish on the table. Now at first I was like heck no but I feel bad because he doesn't ask for much and if this is one of the only things he cares about I feel like I should try to make it work somehow.
Our colors are teals, blues, and greens for our outdoor Sept. wedding and I think having a blue beta fish would actually look kind of neat on the table and it would go with our outdoor naturey theme. However, I have a few concerns...
1. What if the fish dies during the reception?!?!
2. Is having a fish on the table unappetizing?
3. (Selfishly) It might not "go" with the centerpiece feel that I was envisioning - using cut glass vases of all shapes and sizes like the ones in the second picture and filling them with single or just a few flower stems.
Do you have any idea of how I could make this fish idea work or should I just put my foot down and say Sorry honey!. I'm open to any suggestions...
Thank you :)
We did that for a sorority formal once and while it was stunning it was a pain in the ass to lug huge buckets of fish and water around to set up. Then, if a fish dies and is floating belly up...not so good. And then you have find people who want to take them home unless you want lots of fish yourself.
It sounds cool but that it also might be a total pain to pull off.
I think it's a really cool looking idea, but not so practical (pain in the butt to set up, I'm sure), and I'd be TERRIFIED of having dead fish on the table. I think I remember hearing that Beta fish are a little finicky about their water, too, so you'd have to have them set up in their centerpieces well ahead of time if you want to make sure they stay alive all night.
And just on a personal note, I have a little bit of a fish phobia. ;) If you have any guests like me, they probably won't appreciate a fish in the centerpiece!
I would also offer up that if you have children at the wedding, it's not such a great idea. Sometimes kids will try to "catch" the fish or do other things (poke it with sticks, take it out of water, etc...) to it that can be downright mean and inhumane. Kids don't always know and parents don't always supervise correctly.
I think it's an interesting idea but the logistics would be a pain. Also, what if people didn't take them home? Don't beta fish eat each other if you put them in the same tank? You'd have to take them home and keep them in seperate tanks.
Maybe you could work them into the decor in another way, like on the card/gift table.
It might look different, but I think it would be too much of a pain to pull off. Also, what do you do with the fish who survive the night? What if no one takes them home? I know they're only fish, but they are living creatures and deserve to be treated with respect, IMO. Also, I definitely think that having a dead fish on the table (unless it's dinner!) is relatively unappetizing.
FWIW, I love your other idea with the different vases. I've seen this done before and it was stunning.
I agree that it would look pretty, but what are you going to do with the fish afterward?
We had goldfish centre peices for my prom and it was great :). It looked really cool... wasn't a pain to set up at all, (you just have to pick up the fish that morning). And one of the girls on the committee took them home and put them in her aquarium. I think it's neat!
As someone who has worked with animals (at a pet store and the zoo) for several years, I would like to (politely
) mention that this is considered cruel to the fish. Goldfish, contrary to popular belief, are not intended to live in bowls. Their 'waste' is so potent it pollutes water in such a small space, and they don't live very long because they end up poisoned - unless they live in a larger tank with a filter. Plus, they grow excessively fast.
Betas can live in smaller tanks, but even 'beta bowls' aren't recommended. They should have at least a gallon - filtered, preferably. (And yes, they will kill each other if in the same tank).
Unfortunately, most of these centerpiece fish end up dying, or being taken home by someone who doesn't know any better... and dying anyway. It could be due to stress, improper water PH, etc.
We had a few people come into the store I worked at, wanting to do this, and they didn't really want to after we explained it.
Not that I want to be a Debbie Downer - it just seems like this is a popular idea, and yet most people don't realize how horrible this is for the fish ![]()
Alternatively, you could do a water centerpiece with the pretty rocks/marbles, and the fish don't even have to be in them! You could add floating candles, submerged flowers, or whatever you want. There's no reason you have to give up the visual idea of the 'fish bowl'. In fact - one of the Pros just posted about submerged flowers recently!
I like the idea! I think it would be reall pretty and sort of exotic and look really pretty with your colors. Especially if it's one of the only things that's important to him. (My almost Mr. is the same way only one thing he wants: bobble head cake toppers that look like us, sigh* you sort of got off easy ;-) There's a CHANCE the fish might die..but there's a higher chance that they won't. It's your (plural) day, if he really wants it and you're not opposed to it, I think most people will appreciate the unique beauty of it, and for those that don't they could simply avoid staring at the centerpieces!
Also, I don't think it would be too much harder to lug water around to fill fish bowls then it would be to lug water around to fill up all the little glasses you want in the other centerpiece. Maybe you could even put your 2 ideas together, find a taller glass that fits in with the other one's you like and put the fish in there, then you're both happy!
Good luck and have fun and enjoy whatever you choose!!
Wow thank you for all the responses so far!
I think all of you mentioned a concern that I have also thought of - what do we do with the fish afterwards? We definitely don't want to flush them (because that's just horrible) but I don't to count on people taking them home afterwards.
Plus, I'm not a huge fan of keeping a fish in a tiny glass or bowl on the table...I feel like they'll be too cramped and unhappy.
Maybe we'll have 1 beta fish in a bowl on our head table along with the other centerpieces and then I'll just tell my Fiance that we'll have to keep our new beta fish pet after the wedding!
Jessie516 - Thank you! I'm so excited to use these vases I've been collecting. Most of them I've picked up at my local thrift store for 99 cents each - can't beat that!
Marigold - Like you, my fiance's aunt has a terrible fish/sea creature phobia so I bet she would have a reeeeally hard time sitting at the table!
Thanks again :)
Just wanted to add experience on here -- my brother did this for his engagement party -- it was really cool and looked awesome.... but till this day we always remember the fish that died during the party! :( a lot of them died while people were eating dinner! and after. It was sad and that after they didn't know what to do with the fish. I know he kept one or two and they lived a long time with him, but most died.
It does look really cool and is a unique idea, but it has downfalls. As for set up? I don't remember it being that hard. You just buy the fish right before, and bring them in. You can fill the water at the place you're holding your reception.
I just worry about the welfare of the fish..these kind are pets!
I had a betta in college..fed it by hand and he lived 4 years..I loved that little dude. He was a pet..NOT my decor.
I'm not a believer in "a fish is a pet not a decoration" mostly because you don't do anything with them BUT look at them. By my definition you get fish because you want to look at them, not because you'll play fetch. I may also have a skewed viewpoint because we feed our "pet" fish (what else?) feeder fish. Imagine feeding your dog live puppies everyday. Yeah, it's just not sad when they're fish. I think having them on your head table will look really cool, and having one within arms reach will thrill your FI. I don't think one fish will be a logistical nightmare, so I say go for it!
I think it may be more of a hassle than you think getting fish to and from your home to the reception hall. Not only will you have to worry about the water not tipping over, but the fish staying in their fishbowls!
Even flowers on their own can be a hassle if you try them on your own because you have to make sure they're at the right temperature so they don't open and worry about them not wilting.
Why don't you go with something simple. If it's a beach wedding, just get a large cylinder, fill it with sand 1/3 of the way, and top it with some seashells. It's cheap and easy and will save you lots of time and effort. Or try small lanterns. They sell cute ones at IKEA or Michael's.
Let us know what you end up deciding. I'm curious to know.
My cousin had fish on the tables at his reception. It was really cool and entertaining, but all the kids had their hands the bowls. And at the end of the reception it was hard to find enough guests who wanted to take the fish home with them.
I think this is not something you want to hassle with for your wedding. Some people are really put off by fish, and just imagine the fish pooping out a long string of waste while people are eating dinner.
Then, who are they going home with. Are those people set up and willing to take on the responsibility of a fish tank? It's a big old pain in the butt!
Not to say anything negative or be dissenting with you Mighty Sapphire, but a pet is in the eye of the beholder. I loved that little guy. He had personality. Sure my havanese in another country might look like a delicacy, but here he's part of my family.
I just don't see animals as decor.
It's a relatively cheap centerpiece & I'm going to do that for just 1 table (for decor & more importantly, an inside joke). It's cute & pretty so I don't think it's unappetizing. things to consider:
1. Where the reception is? How long of a drive will ur fish have to sustain b4 making it to the site? Are the logistics of setup conducive for presenting the fish as the centerpeice?
2. Get a fish from a nice pet store (not walmart, for e.g.) in order to make sure it's healthy & fresh
3. Size of the fishbowl will play an important role in the longevity of the fish. Bigger the bowl more likely ur fish will live a long time.
4. I heard that somebody else did fish as a centerpeice at the reception site I'll be using & all of them went belly up by the end of the reception; personally, I wouldn't mind if my fish die since only 1 table is affected (& it's a joke anyway). So think about how distraught u & ur fiance will be if one or more fish go belly up
5. Ppl also say that betta are sensitive & recommend bottled spring water instead of tap water (plus pH balance, of course).
Good luck! Let me know how it goes!
I think it also depends on how many tables you are having. Maybe you could use this idea for you rehersal dinner or bridal shower.
I think everyone else has covered the pros and cons, but I did see a wedding show once (maybe it was Platinum Weddings?) where the had tall, cylindrical centerpiece vases with fish swimming around in them. The vases were topped with large floral bouquets (much like a normal tall arrangement at a wedding) and remember thinking that it was a pretty cool idea. :)
what if you had one at just your table? you could name him and keep him as a pet- that way your fi gets what he wants and it is easy!
How about using goldfish candles instead?
I saw some fish shaped candy that is kinda neat too.
have you ever seen those glass fish that are attached by fishing line to a glass bubble so that they float? those might be perfect. put one or two in some water on each table then you can take them home (or your guest can) for a low maintenance aquarium.
I think this is a really cool idea, but some of the commenters above have good points about the fish dying.
When I read the title, I actually thought you meant bowls full of goldfish crackers! :D
I am one of the brides who is having fish as a center piece. We have already got the bowls and will decide on the fish right before the wedding. I worked at a pet store for a while so I know all about taking care of fish. Honestly, i can se the "creulity" side, but on the same note, most, if not all, of the animals people currently hold as pets were not naturally ment to be a pet. Rats were not ment to live in a small cage, dogs were bread to what we wanted, cats were originally wild.. So if you make that the point then you cannot deny any other living creature....
Ok off my soap box! I just think you should make sure to go to a pet store that is a specialty store, like petsmart, petland, ect. Also, get more fish than you actually need so you have some extra just in case they are sick. The cheapest route would be to get feeder gold fish and they can all be stored together in a big bucket. Pre fill your containers and use some water conditioner, then when you are ready just net the fish into the bowls... they should live for a while as long as they are healthy.
Ok, my first thought...what if you get a bunch of drunk guys and one dares another to eat one of the fish? Or more than one decides it might be "funny". Yuck!! ![]()
I kind of like the glass fish with the little glass bubbles attached by wire...I actually had some of these when I was younger and I loved them!
Could you perhaps use fake fish, or create (and laminate) some fish made out of some pretty paper in your colors, then submerse them in water?
I agree that it could be problematic with live beta fish that kill each other when put together. I think it would be beautiful and unique, but way too hard and cruel to the fish.
I got married in May. It was an awesome day, but overwhelming. One of the things we are upset about is that we didn't get a chance to speak to each and everyone of your guests. So many people want to talk to you, you barely get to eat or drink.
With all that, having a great time, enjoying your day, wrangling your gifts/cards, dealing with last minute issues/details, dancing, getting any leftover food/drink, spending your wedding night with your husband, going on your honeymoon, having a great time with friends and family----
Do you really want to add taking a fish home to all of that?
Forget about it, you'll thank me later.
In the end no one cares about your centerpieces!
I have a macaw. Sure he may have meant to be flying free in Costa Rica, but here he has a damn good life. He's loved. Is silly. Has a blast here and eats amazing fruits and veggies. A good life for a bird.
Answering the statements posed by KDLowery, I would like to respond that yes, many animals were meant to be living in the wild but are DOMESTICATED now meaning that they live among mankind. I was a biology major in college and am also a huge animal lover. While a rat may not be free in a cage, it is used to living in conjunction with mankind. And many of these goldfish might not be able to life a life on their own were it not for us.
What I do know is that there are situations that can definitely lower the quality of life for any animal..or human for that matter. And I'd say the odds are stacked against a goldfish in a centerpiece living as long a domesticated life as it should (when compared to goldfish as pets in an aquarium or in a koi pond) and also odds against it it may meet not only an untimely demise, but a possibly cruel one as well (drunk guys daring to eat the fishie).
I think it isnt a horrid idea...but fish die, EASILY and a dead fish is NOT cute or romantic ;)
I saw this at one or two bar mitzvah's growing up (They did some sort of contest at one for who would get to take them home and I wanted SO BADLY to win!) I think it's just a lot of work. I wouldn't worry about other people finding it unappetizing... some people won't like your centerpeice no matter hwat (the smell, it blocking a view, etc) and you have to do what you want. However, make sure you have someone doing it for you... since that's a headache. I also really like this idea:
have you ever seen those glass fish that are attached by fishing line to a glass bubble so that they float? those might be perfect. put one or two in some water on each table then you can take them home (or your guest can) for a low maintenance aquarium.
Also- what if you alternated?? Some like your idea with the glasses and some with fish?
Ok, so I know of a bride who wanted live fish swimming around for her centerpieces ... she did it and guess what happened?
There were dead fish everywhere. I guess they just died?
Also, have you ever seen fish poop ... it's pretty sick.
I used to be a banquet waitress and saw way too many belly up goldfish at weddings.....it's adorable, until one dies....
And then (if they live) through the reception, someone will have to take it/them home...everyone doesn't always want a new pet!
I think you could use the beta with the plant at the top as food. Follow all the directions to keep them safe. Having the plant will keep them alive through the night so you don't have to worry about feeding them or having them die of not eating. Be sure to have people designated ahead of time who are take them and give them a loving home. Maybe have a pet store deliver them so you can be more sure they will be set up correctly and live through the night. It's really sweet that your FI wants to pitch in ideas, so it's worth trying to make it work. It's a really neat idea, which guests will be talking about for a long time, and if you do it right, in a good way!
great idea, except... as an event designer i was cleaning up for another event while the other people were arriving. they were setting the fish up and they were DEAD. as soon as they put the fish in they died. they had a nemo event with dead fish. it was so sad :(
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