- 4 years ago
My boyfriend & I went out for a nice dinner last night to celebrate a professional milestone for him. We’d been waiting for this milestone to happen for a LONG TIME, so it was a huge relief that it was finally over.
I wasn’t planning on bringing up engagement or timelines, but I had an extra glass of champagne & it just came out. We were talking about some financial matters – whether or not to move, vacations, buying a new car – and I made a little comment about how he better save some money for “other big purchases”. He laughed & told me he had it under control.
When we got home, he kept telling me how happy he was with me, so I thought it might be safe to bring up our engagement timeline, which we’d last talked about 6 months ago. He said it was still on track (he’d initially said he wanted to get engaged around 3 years of dating, which is next March) and that was still the time he was thinking. He was just so calm and happy about the idea, where as other times he seemed a little more stressed out or pressured by the idea of getting engaged. I just said something along the lines of, “I don’t want to pressure you about this. I absolutely love you & I’m incredibly happy, but I also definitely want to get married & have kids & I won’t wait around forever. I’d like to see us moving towards those “next steps” in our relationship in the next 6-12 months”, to which he absolutely agreed. I also asked him to let me know if there’s any changes to our timeline down the road, and he agreed to that as well.
I just fell asleep at peace and so happy with our talk. It was so calm and happy and positive, whereas some of our conversations in the past about getting engaged had been a little more tense.
I told one of my male coworkers about his change in tone and he smiled and said, “It means that he’s been thinking about it and he’s definitely coming around to the idea of it happening relatively soon.”
Now I know that 6-12 months isn’t “soon” for some Waiting Bees, but we’ve got a super crazy next few months, and I’d honestly rather get engaged when the craziness (my sister’s wedding, his busy season at work, FOUR international trips between the two of us) is over. Just knowing that he is thoughtful about our “timeline” and happy with it is enough to make me happy.